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@arien

Arien@arien
Rank: Loyal Sidekick
Total Posts: 125

@mineralizedwritings

Previous to that, my sister and I would make up stories with out stuffies and toys.
Yes, us too! So much fun, right? I would make literally anything I was doing into a story when I was younger–mostly playing outside, but also cooking, cleaning my room, doing laundry, a…

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@sarafini

That sounds really cool!! I’ve never known anybody who has written an autobiography before.

The only advice I can offer, is this:

Read other auto/biographies. Then you can see how they wrote it. Secondly, when you’re starting at your childhood, you don’t have to document everything. Think of some really important moments that happen…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

Corie

I looked at the fennec fox curiously. Maybe he was a Lyabrinnian… or at least like one. His mouth didn’t move when he spoke.

Jocelyn smiled and I smiled back at her. She seemed like a nice girl. I started down the hall as the others followed.

I rubbed my arms and shivered as I felt a cold draft blow by. Ty seemed to not…[Read more]

@orielle21

Oh! I really liked that. I wouldn’t change a thing! It seems like the kind of story you read when you need a pick me up. Low stakes, but still lots of fun, and the time travel thing makes it extra interesting!

I think that was what I was kind of thinking in my head, I just couldn’t put words to it. 😅

@arien @esther-c @lewilliams @keilah-h @felicity @mineralizedwritings @sarafini

Wow, all of y’all’s stories are so inspiring 😊😍!!
So, I’ve always loved reading. Even when I was little enough to not know how to read, I would sit in the floor with a picture book and try to read to myself and my mama.
When I was about eleven, I was on a zoom call…[Read more]

@orielle21

Yeah! If the stakes are low, that means there’s not much at stake.

High stakes would be if somebody was at risk of dyeing or permanent damage.

Doesn’t seem like anyone going to die here XD

@orielle21

Oh, and I like the pic you chose for Joel XD

@orielle21

Oh! I really liked that. I wouldn’t change a thing! It seems like the kind of story you read when you need a pick me up. Low stakes, but still lots of fun, and the time travel thing makes it extra interesting! I felt like you did a really good job moving between the dialogue and the narrated sections.

Thanks for the great read!

@felicity

It was rather cheesy, but…we laughed. That’s all that matters, right? 😀 😀 Sweet!

Lol, yes, that’s all that matters! Speaking of sibling laughs, my little brother is always talking about how many books I read, and he was singing the song from Tangled, the part where Repunzel’s singing “And then I’ll read a book, or maybe two or three.” B…[Read more]

@felicity

Wait, are you sure he wasn’t teasing you? 🤣 It was pretty obvious to me!

Oh, no, I know when he’s teasing, and he wasn’t teasing 🤣. Okay, good!! 😂

@esther-c

Took me a while to reply, but now I am! 😁

Yay! Thank you for taking the time to respond 😊!

First of all, I could really feel the sibling dynamic! Great job on that! Sibling dynam…

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@felicity

Oh my word!!! That’s super cold.

I think it’s cold in a lot of the US because of the arctic front. Yesterday was terrible. It didn’t go over 3 degrees Fahrenheit!! Today is a little better. Funny thing is, a week from now it will be 58. 😆

I expect we’ll see a polar bear soon

I wouldn’t doubt it. Lol 😂

@lightoverdarkness6

Took me a while to reply, but now I am! 😁

First of all, I could really feel the sibling dynamic! Great job on that! Sibling dynamics are my favorite!! I could also feel the tone: Sure, they were in a bad situation, but it didn’t get them down all the way, bc they had each other.

I’m already really liking your cha…[Read more]

@orielle21

I enjoyed it!! It was cute and simple!!

But for some critiques, here’s what I thought:

So, I noticed that the kids are going to school. But it’s Christmastime. So that would be weird if they were going to school that close to Christmas Day.

Secondly, I felt as if the dialogue was unnatural. So to help with the flow of dialogue, I s…[Read more]

@felicity

*clears throat* Yeah it’s true.

Um, we were having a bit of a joke. We were in the same room, both on KP, and when she said in her intro, “I’m a baby barista”, I put, “hey, my sister works at a coffee shop too!” and…well, we lost it.

Omg, that’s hilarious!!! I love it!! That sounds like something me and my cousin would do (We’re like s…[Read more]

@arien

One thing about writing style: sometimes using more descriptive words for “said” can be distracting and sound contrived.

Yeah, I use said too much. I’ve actually started having my grandma’s I-Pad next to me while I write, and the I-Pad has a list of words to use other than “Said.”

I know, it can be hard not to use “said” all the time, b…

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So, this is kind of what Dao looks like:

Well… 🤔 I think “deus es machina” is the right term. 😅

@felicity

I know!!

I really like Dao! I know that the fact that he suddenly showed up and saved them is kind of deus es machina, but it had to happen. 😁

I could probably ramble more on why I write… but… we’ll just keep it at that. 😜