ryry

@jonas

Yeah, the sleepless are interesting. That reminds me: I was surprised to see a sleepless in Edgedancer. That was one of the few things that surprised me.

I liked how he continued the trend of Lopen accidentally swearing his oaths after the action is over XD.

Yeah 😂

@jonas

It does make a lot of sense. I just wonder what the Dawnshards are in relation to the shards in terms of what they can do in the first place. The shards are wells of investiture, whereas the Dawnshards are only spoken of as “commands” as you’ve said, and the sleepless seemed terrified of the prospect of them getting out into the world, so…[Read more]

@jonas

Just looking at Fusion, destruction, amplification, and dynamism, I feel like there’s much potential interaction. I think there’s a whole lot of interesting you could do mechanically. Using destruction to precisely carve any kind of shape out of any kind of substance is nice, and that in tandem with pure fusion, connecting objects at a…[Read more]

@jonas

Yeah, I’ve read both as well. The sleepless have been really interesting to learn about. And the Dawnshard was really intriguing, and having the background from what you’ve talked about before really helped.

@jonas

So I’ve been really bad at following up on this thread for quite a while now, as well as KP in general lately. I’ve sort of skimmed through, but you’ve probably done a lot since you last posted. Is there still anything specific you would like my thoughts on still?

@jonas

Yeah those theories definitely make sense!

I agree on the fact that the Dawnshard was the most interesting aspect. I also thought it was interesting seeing how the Sleepless communicated, and more of what their goals are.

The rest was more simply entertaining in the Lopen-is-great sense

@jonas

I’ve read them both, and enjoyed both, what were your other thoughts?

@hybridlore

Yeah it is, actually. 😂 I didn’t want to write about someone getting married so I chose adoption instead. XDD

Oh and for those of you wondering, Ami’s type 2.

@freedomwriter76 @lightoverdarkness6 @hybridlore @whalekeeper @mineralizedwritings @smiley @savannah_grace2009 @rae @grcr @anyone-else

Sooo… I was working on some “character-building” the past day or so, and I’ve fixed my MCs’ character arcs/internal conflicts to tie into the theme more and so I can write them better/more accurately. (With a l…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

Nooo Marcel the poor boy! He needs to see someone for that head injury

(But also yay cuz I might finally have an excuse to light Felicity’s short fuse)

@smiley

Ack! Sorry I’m late, but I finally found time to read this. M’kay…

So the one big thing that I noticed was a lot of telling and info-dumping. I could handle the information, but it’s not always enjoyable to read a bunch of backstory. Stuff like that should be sprinkled throughout. Besides that, there were a few places where things…[Read more]

@hybridlore

Of course! (:

@savannah_grace2009 @hybridlore @highscribeofaetherium @jonas @anyone

Ok, so I have bad writing, but my worst writing I deleted years ago!!! 😭 There was three chapters of a book I wrote on my parents computer when I was like 7, I tried to start a few books when I was 9/10/11, I had an almost completed book around 11, but I still have a book I…[Read more]

@rae

but I guess Sef isn’t there so… Whatever.

Oop, sorry, I assumed they started to switch partners like everyone else

@savannah_grace2009

I think so! You can go ahead and RP first if you want. 🙃

@whalekeeper

I love itttt. Marcel is the best

@jonas

Mr. Gregory 

“So, will you fight? Or do you yield?”

“False dichotomy,” Gregory grumbled.

“What was that, tyrant?”

Several students had stopped dancing and were now watching them, some curious and some nervous.

“The rules are in place so that these students can enjoy their dance as much as possible, I’m sure. You are not only breakin…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

I think you’re writing her pretty well except she probably isn’t completely calm rn. But she would be pretending to be Babs’ sake, so nvm, it’s good.

Felicity

“Like… angsty depressed teens? Or people who pretend they aren’t depressed, but then you look at them and you can clearly see that they… Ohhh wait, I think I see one.”…[Read more]

@rae

The writing you shared was a little depressing, but the characters weren’t melodramatic at least. I don’t pay much attention to punctuation as a writing problem. The art of melodrama is at an all time high here though. Like “He grabbed Nejin by the collar of his shirt, his eyes radiating hate, and rage.” After Nejin, a little boy he never…[Read more]