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TheShadow replied to the topic The Woods of Rosen in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 2 days ago
@keilah-h @hybridlore @ellette-giselle @the_lost-journal @liberty @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint
New chapter, please tear into this.
Chapter 4
Dylan stopped abruptly, “Where’s the path?”
“What do you mean ‘where’s the path’?” Olivia shoved past Elina and Jack, gazing out ahead. A seemingly endless sea of trees met her.“Oh, great, nic…[Read more]
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 3 days ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
my loyal subjects, I beg pardon.
Tragedy has struck.
The dragon laptop ate LOS for breakfast! 😱
I was able to recover most of it, but alas I must be away to other duties.
No new sections until Monday. 😭
🐲
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 3 days ago
I really like him, and he’s very intriguing. He sounds like a character that could demand an entire book of his own! He reminds me of the monks who bought Squanto.
I was literally thinking, “This guy needs his own book!” while I was editing! 🤣
Oh wow, that’s brutal. But those are the stories I love best!! Stories of REAL s…[Read more]
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Potato reporter replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 2 weeks, 4 days ago
@linus-smallprint @ellette-giselle @hybridlore @raxforge @keilah-h @rae @whalekeeper@loopylin @theshadow @arcticanimals @theducktator and @liberty @esther-c @highscribeofaetherium @jonas @grcr
Everyone I can think of! I just got a random person I met on YouTube to join Kingdom pen!!!!! She is a Christian writer! Just like us!!!!! We met in the…[Read more]
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 4 days ago
I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO READ THIS SECTION!!!!!!!!!
I’m so happy! I posted it and I was like, “Liberty’s gonna love this!!!”
Haha!!! I’m so glad I threw you a loop!!
Good! I’m glad you were scared for him! 😂
I’m so HAPPY!!!!!!!
So, this is really cazy because I never thought this scene was one of my best!!…[Read more]
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 4 days ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION!!
Time passed, and Leon’s wounds began to heal, leaving deep scaring in many places. However, his strength was harder to regain. Without good food, and surviving on only two meals a day, he had already begun to weaken. After the beating and…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 5 days ago
Ooo! No I haven’t!!
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 5 days ago
*grin* Yup. That never works for an excuse!
Yup. lololol.
Actually, that scene with Leon was inspired by a true account I read! Wonder if it’s the same one?
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 5 days ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION!!
The first thing he knew was the pain. He couldn’t remember having ever been in such terrible pain. Then he felt that he was lying on something softer than the ground, and someone was bathing his back with cool water.
“Will he be alright?” a…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks, 6 days ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION!!
One evening, Julian was walking home alone from visiting a family and bringing a basket of food Adeline had prepared for them. It was growing dusk, and he was almost out of the alleys when a voice hailed him. “You, stranger, it looks like y…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks ago
Do you have an actual game this is based off?
There were several games like this medieval children played, and later on they evolved to Jacks and Marbles. So in a way, yes.
Aww!!!😍 I love this part!
Me too! So glad!!
I’m pretty sure Aelic is remembering the priest from his town when he says this…and how that guy wanted to sac…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks ago
Oh, sorry for devastating you.
Hmmm. We’ll have to wait and see.
Did you see the section I posted today?
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION!!
The days passed, and Leon threw himself whole heartedly into the work. At first, the idea of completing at task well for someone who owned him was revolting. But after one long evening of prayer, Leon felt in his heart what was right, and…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks ago
My friend, clearly, you wouldn’t say that to his face. Julian is a very noble creature. He is a warrior, but is also has all the manners of a gentleman. Or gentlehorse I should say. He is what you would call a warrior poet, though in equine form. He has the utmost decorum around ladies, human and equine alike.
Okay, okay. It just was n…[Read more]
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 1 day ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
For anyone interested in the song that I showed part of, here it is:
(It’s a medieval song from the Underground Church.)
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 1 day ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION
Leon looked at the shafts of sunlight moving across the floor of the hold as the ship rocked up and down in the waves. He and Rolf had been held captive down here for over two weeks. The ship had come to a stop at two other places, and they h…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 2 days ago
oh man. I have had some of the WORST sprains ever!! One took almost two months to heal!
Roland’s is not as severe, and he has been off of it for four days and as you can see he starts limping when they travel again.Oooh! I love Dian!
you just love sailor characters. 😝
Is that why you like him? Or for other reasons too?
As for what w…[Read more]
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TheShadow replied to the topic The Woods of Rosen in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 3 days ago
@keilah-h @hybridlore @ellette-giselle @the_lost-journal @liberty @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint
Oof, it’s been two weeks. Well, here’s the third chapter, please tell me what you think once you’re done reading it. This is a shorter chapter, so I’ll probably post the fourth tomorrow.
Chapter 3
“That’s lovely.” Elina sat down, an uncom…[Read more]
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 3 days ago
@hybridlore @linus-smallprint @koshka @keilah-h @elishavet-pidyon @liberty
NEXT SECTION
Leon woke in the darkness. He heard Rolf breathing and felt the rocking of the ship below him. He sat up, wondering where they were going and what fate lay ahead. Leon leaned against the side of the ship’s hold and drew his knees to his chest,…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 3 weeks, 3 days ago
I think so! Send it!
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