Liberty

@savannah_grace2009

Aw, that was so sad! I really liked it though, tag me if you post more.

@grcr

Oohhh, I like it!

@jonas

Yeah, it was mentioned in the dialogue, but I guess it might be easy to miss that.

@rae

Thanks! I fixed the stall part in my document, but it won’t let me edit my post anymore.

@jonas

So, the king has been traveling for a while. He wasn’t aware of the rules put on the people by his regents, who he’d appointed to take care of the country while he was gone.

When I wrote it, I was trying to create sort of an allegory. I know it’s not perfect, but that’s what I was thinking when I came up with it. The king is meant to…[Read more]

@hybridlore

Much better!

@jonas @rae

I added a few sentences that hopefully resolve it a little better? I’m not sure. Do you still think it’s missing something?

… I can’t believe I didn’t see it before—who he was. The suspicion has grown inside of me for weeks, strengthening with each day that passed. When the guards disappeared from the marketplace. When the curfe…

[Read more]

@jonas

Look up, I botched your simple tag.

@jomas @highscribeofaetherium

A menthol is what a cough drop is called. It’s on the couch drop bags in the stores.

@jonas

Paper isn’t allowed, but non-gun weapons are.

Well, at my Dad’s work, menthols aren’t allowed places, yet he always has a razor knife in his pocket.

@rae

Alright! XD Thanks, I appreciate it.

@loopylin

I think Gregory would definiately interrogate Junior, since Junior has an unregistered pet and boots already! This could get interesting!

@hybridlore

My thoughts are the same as Jonas, but a horse “pen” is correctly called a stall. If the horse is in a field outside, or a fenced in area, it’s called a paddock. If you need horsey terms, just tag me.

@grcr

Got it!

@jonas

Yeah, I knew it was pretty obvious. I’m not sure how else to write it (where it’s not obvious) in such a short word count.
So, yeah. As soon as I posted it I was like, oh, I need to add something that talks about how the rules/guards have been changed. Really when I wrote it I was thinking it’d have a few more scenes, but then when I got…[Read more]

@grcr

Ugh, I know, that’s the worst. Maybe try Nameberry? I usually go there for names.

@smiley

Peter gave a look of confusion which Pietro replied with a narrowing of his eyes. “They’re my chocolates.”

“Pietro.” Hannah gave the “look” that Pietro had known forever. “Let the kid have a chocolate.”

“These are rare Sokoivan chocolates, do you know how hard they are to find?”

“They’re hersheys just written in Sokovian,” Wanda argue…

[Read more]

@grcr

I like it! Blair and Blaine are really similar names, though. That might get confusing, unless it’s intentional?

@jonas

Is it more like the word “real”, but with the ‘l’ cut off and “eln” stuck on?

yes, I believe you could say that.

I’m probably always going to read it in my head as “realm” with an n (nothing sounds wrong about that to me) just cause that’s how it looks.

That makes sense. It just sounds wrong to me because my most successful way of m…[Read more]