Liberty

@ellette-giselle

Leo

He grinned. “First off you’re going to sit on that couch in the basement break room and sort a bucket of bolts and screws that I accidentally dumped together last week. Or maybe that was two weeks ago.” He paused to blink up at the ceiling for a moment, then refocused on Rory. “Anyway, you’ll do that while I check the work…[Read more]

@rae

this was another good section. I feel like you’re really sinking into a good style and voice with this. I had a slight problem with one sentence though.

When Immanuel came, the laws God previously had placed changed.

I don’t see that in the Bible. If anything, the laws were reinforced more strongly. (You have heard it said do not commit adu…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Who is James? (I think I want him to be someone who is laid back and jokes around a lot, but occasionally has a moment where he shows surprising wisdom.

oh. That’s not at all how I pictured him.

idk if this is a good idea, but I pictured him as quieter and much more thoughtful. Someone who is constantly watching and l…[Read more]

@esther-c

It looks a lot better! One thing I noticed is that Antonio does say “fabuloso” twice.

“Then the topic conveniently comes up in a conversation with Easton.”

Also, I feel like this might be better if you just change it to “Then I can ask Easton” or something like that. Otherwise, it looks great! I like the way you made Hallie more rea…[Read more]

*pops head in*

I’m so happy to see this forum still active and well🥹🥲

@kielah-h @ellette-giselle @raxforge @whalekeeper @hybridlore

This is the final part of Story 9.

In my writing document, I named this story temporarily as ‘Delirium’ but I would like some better title ideas if you can give me some. Thx in advance.

Five days had passed since Baron had been taken to the Handel mansion and his symptoms…[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Awwww!!!

But in six months he’s moving to Florida for college…..😭😭

At least I have a little brother <333 I love him to DEATH…I literally love him so muchhhh

That is so funny that your MC is named Hallie because (I know I’ve told you this before but Imma say it again hahaha) my little sister’s name is Hallie!!! so it’s just…

[Read more]

@koshka

I know!! Poor kid. You don’t know whether to laugh or cry.🥺

Rory

Rory leaned against the wall and ran his arm over his forehead. “So, where are we going? Now that I’m your assistant, what should I do?”

(sorry, but Rory and I are equally lost on how to move forward. We don’t know much about the school’s underworld.)

@linus-smallprint

It looks good to me! (But I’m not a huge outliner as previously stated.)

so, does this mean you’re gonna start posting chapters?! 😃

@loopylin

Yeah, I don’t usually respond on here either, but I still try to bring the posts I see to God.

And, oof. Getting a job can be rough. I’ll be praying.

@loopylin

I bet if i made Dante bored enough, he’d sneak into the school and pretend to be a student for the day. That would be fun.

lol

@loopylin

Alpha

Alpha shrugged. “She put a kid in the hospital, and thought she could take care of me too. So I stabbed her. And yes, I do often stab people.” Alpha paused, thinking about what he had just said, for the first time considering how his audience would take that information without context. “Though, it’s not just because I’m bored.…[Read more]

@the_lost-journal

speaking of jews, what are your honest thoughts on them? Like how to you see them?

I believe they are God’s people, and that the promises God made still apply. I don’t believe that the Church is the new Israel.

Other than them being God’s people, I don’t stand behind them. They support the lgbtq+ community last I heard, and I…[Read more]

@the_lost-journal

“those d*** Christians” Did she say dumb? Or something else Idk about… but besides that, I think that would take patience, not snapping back at them.

No- I didn’t type the whole word because most people consider it a cuss word- she said “damn”. I don’t consider it as bad as the f-word but I definitely still don’t use it.

and I have already written some scenes for it btw, but most of them are huge spoilers atm🤭

@godlyfantasy12 forgot to tag you😅🫠

Well, I made the forum, the forum stopped working for me, and I also disappeared off the face of the earth for over two weeks😂💀 well I’ll try to answer questions/responses now😅

@highscribeofaetherium @hybridlore @keilah-h @grcr @savannah_grace2009 @elishavet-pidyon @theshadow @thearcaneaxiom @whalekeeper @ellette-giselle @loopylin @koshka @trailbl…[Read more]

@theshadow

Ooh, I’ve also got to add in the part about the gov trying to pass a new law that allows them to persecute Christians, but I haven’t figured out when yet.

@theshadow

Great! 😁

Okay, I see what you mean. Are you thinking like, within their friend groups? Most of the story so far takes place either at school, the church meetings, or their house. Later, though, there will probably be a lot of scenes at their respective job assignments, so you’ll get to see more of the culture then. Do you have any i…[Read more]