AveryTheExplodey

@jonas

Does invested art mean any of the local magic systems? Like Allomancy? I didn’t realize that Harmony was having trouble, is that in Lost Metal? Yeah, the scale and importance of Roshar would lead me to think it likely.

@jonas

Destruction tends to be a bit…messy, but you probably could get it precise enough to do that. These powers are going to be just being discovered in the story this is for, so I will get to explore the technological effects of them. I think these are going to give you nearly perfect technology in a lot of areas.

Yeah, that makes sense.

More l…

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Welcome to KP!

I’m the Arcane Axiom. I like math, searching for divine fundamental truth, and exploring that in my writing. I read/write sci-fi/fantasy, and currently am working on a universe with my sister we call the Septrum.

Questions:

Do you lean towards hard or soft worldbuilding? (hard meaning more concrete rules for the reader to u…[Read more]

@walkbyfaith

Welcome to KP!

I’m the Arcane Axiom. I like math, searching for divine fundamental truth, and exploring that in my writing. I read/write sci-fi/fantasy, and currently am working on a universe with my sister we call the Septrum.

Questions:

If your more into the romance, do you find yourself more interested in the classic tropes,…[Read more]

@jonas

It does make a lot of sense. I just wonder what the Dawnshards are in relation to the shards in terms of what they can do in the first place. The shards are wells of investiture, whereas the Dawnshards are only spoken of as “commands” as you’ve said, and the sleepless seemed terrified of the prospect of them getting out into the world, so…[Read more]

@jonas

Just looking at Fusion, destruction, amplification, and dynamism, I feel like there’s much potential interaction. I think there’s a whole lot of interesting you could do mechanically. Using destruction to precisely carve any kind of shape out of any kind of substance is nice, and that in tandem with pure fusion, connecting objects at a…[Read more]

@jonas

Yeah, I’ve read both as well. The sleepless have been really interesting to learn about. And the Dawnshard was really intriguing, and having the background from what you’ve talked about before really helped.

@jonas

So I’ve been really bad at following up on this thread for quite a while now, as well as KP in general lately. I’ve sort of skimmed through, but you’ve probably done a lot since you last posted. Is there still anything specific you would like my thoughts on still?

@hybridlore

Aww it’s cute! I actually like it! For some reason it reminds me of “A Series of Unfortunate Events” books. Idk why XD

@highscribeofaetherium

I was laughing so hard!!! The plunger gun…ahhh that was great! hahaha!

Mr Mwahaha…that’s hilarious!!

@highscribeofaetherium

*is so confused*

Um…..that is the UNDERSTATEMENT of the century lol I was questioning 13 year old Sara’s sanity when I read this….

I’m glad you changed directions with your novel lol.

Ummmmmmmmmmmmm YESSS. I actually thought this junk could get published!!!

THIS IS WHY YOU NEED PLOTTING! OR ELSE YOUR WRITING WILL END U…[Read more]

@trailblazer

Yeah….but the problem is that i’ll have to have implants when I turn eighteen because those teeth will never grow back…so there will be holes in my mouth for eternity. Fun times!

Okay so a backstory-they are Andromedan, but they were kidnapped when they were little and taken to Earth. In this convulated version of a novel, I had it that all Andromedans had purple hair and yellow eyes. They lived a normal human life, etc.

But on Earth all Andromedans take the form of humans, and then the mc’s lost their memory. Now they…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium

Because he’s from Earth and they’re not.

I mean I get where I was going…but it is still really, really dumb.

I WANT TO BURN THIS.

“Because,” Liv says. “You are going to use your powers to bring our parents back. Or else.” What powers?

“Or else what?” Jorryn challenges. Oh great. The last thing we need right now is for Jorryn to get cocky.

“Easy there, ‘spitfire’!” Gael mocks.

“It’s gonna be bad,” Liv assures us.

“You don’t know, do you?” Jorryn…

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@jonas

I never ever threw my writing away, no matter how bad it was….i have every single horrible story I ever wrote in a huge binder. I remember thinking the stories were good…and I recently read threw it again and wanted to burn it.

Another embarrasing scene for you:

. Jordan grabbed her arm again and yanked her over to him. He handed her…

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@rae

The writing you shared was a little depressing, but the characters weren’t melodramatic at least. I don’t pay much attention to punctuation as a writing problem. The art of melodrama is at an all time high here though. Like “He grabbed Nejin by the collar of his shirt, his eyes radiating hate, and rage.” After Nejin, a little boy he never…[Read more]

Oh, and this garbage:

“Shele” he said, turning around, immediately bumping into a tall, yet frail man.

 

He grabbed Nejin by the collar of his shirt, his eyes radiating hate, and rage.

Adrenaline rushed through Nejin’s system, but it gave no resolve to run or fight. Guards charged in, clearing the area, tackling the Man to the ground, losin…

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@savannah_grace2009

This is some of my writing I want to burn, bury the remnants in a dark cave, then collapse the cave to never see the light of day again, but here it is for you to enjoy…

“Mailes?… Do you think me a good Jan?” Laijas asked. Surprise stunned Mailes, what kind of question was that? It didn’t sound like something Laijas would…

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@rae

oh my gosh….lol I was reading it and I was like, oh it’s really good! and then I read this sentence:

I can’t tell you what Nahim’s face looked like because he never showed it to anyone.

And then I laughed.

sorry if that sounds mean…..

And now for the worst thing I have ever written:

“It worked!” Jorryn cries.…

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