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Ah, maybe that’s where we differ. I don’t find it hard to write using I because my characters are often quite similar to me. I just fill in with imagination in the bits where they are different 😀
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
@seekjustice I know right? What are our books thinking?
How did I ever decide on that name? XP
@valtmy Indeed it is.
Yes, fun villains could be fun to write sometimes. ;3Okay I have to go to bed now. I got a lot done. YAY!
Perhaps I shall see some of you tomorrow. Good night.IMMA KAPEEFER! Til we're old and gray!
@seekjustice I’m starting chapter 20 now, and in the opening of that Justice is telling Chessy she is supposed to be at home, as usual. 😛 Then Jonas looks at Justice to make him shut up, also as usual. 😛
However, I was wondering, of course Jonas would tell Justice not to be so harsh, but Justice is just trying to protect Chessy, so why is he only criticized for his harshness, and why does nobody pay attention to the fact that Chessy is only seventeen, not even old enough to be in the military in a real war, but nobody even protests when she says she wants to fight except her father, and he doesn’t really either. He just says do what she thinks is right. Jonas is such an older brother type of guy, and Iras is solid and thoughtful, seems like they would both be a little bit more protective of Chessy, don’t you think? I never thought of it before, but it just hit me that they all think they’re going to die, but they just let her waltz right out there with them, even though they’re all several years older than her and actual military age. Did I miss something, or do they really not care at all?
@catwing I love romance. I always have. 😛 I’m one of those romantic, dreamy girls who wants to be rescued by a prince and carried away on a white horse, and have been since I was probably two years old. So…having a romance subplot would automatically make the book much more interesting to me. 😉 But I do understand that if your characters want to do something you don’t want them to do, that’s annoying.
@valtmy Since it’s a parody, I don’t think that’s a problem, however, in order for it to work you want to make it over the top. That’s actually what I was getting to when I asked you about your definition of parody the other day, but didn’t have a chance to finish the conversation. What I was going to say was your book sounds really nice and cute and cliche, but it’s hard to tell that you’re making fun of the genre. It just seems like you’re making fun of your heroine’s ideals a bit, but it’s not quite over the top enough to make it obvious that you thought the cliches through. Does that make sense?Take what I say with a grain of salt, of course, since I believe several other people have read your story more extensively than I have and they liked it, right? 😉
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
@catwing Goodbye!
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
Hmm I guess that makes sense. I’m calling it a parody because that’s the closest thing I can think of for now. I’m trying to strike a delicate balance between drama and comedy. In some ways being over the top is good but I’m also deconstructing some of the cliches and sometimes that calls for being more subdued and anticlimatic.
Just curious, but how far did you read into it? Because there are several parts in the first chapters which I felt ran the risk of being too over the top.
Ah, yes. That makes sense. For me, I need to maintain creative distance from my characters.
Bye!
I truly think that Justice doesn’t care. Not necessarily that he doesn’t care about her, but that he doesn’t care she’s underaged. Revolutions aren’t usually made of people of military age after all, especially people’s revolutions and since most of them are students, even the people they’re riling up are going to be quite young.
Besides they’ve got Waif with them. And Kendall.
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
@valtmy I’m not sure…I think it was the part about the party where she was talking to all her brother’s friends and embarrassing herself by not knowing the meaning of the poetry. 😉
Anyway, we’ve already established that we enjoy different types of humor, right? 😛 You need to have your humor carefully explained and diagramed, while I prefer the absurd and over-the-top in general. (At least, that’s what I recall from our discussion about my comedic short story. I could be wrong.)
@seekjustice Well, I wasn’t talking about Justice. No, he probably wouldn’t care. 😛 What I thought was weird was the fact that he was the one trying to keep her at home, while the rest of the older people like Jonas and Iras who actually cared for Chessy didn’t seem to think twice about whether she should be allowed to the front lines. Oh, and Quillon, too. I mean, they’re all complaining to Justice about how he’s being harsh to Chessy, but they’re not looking at the other side and considering that she’s just a little girl, several years younger than most of them.No one can control Waif, as is established later, 😉 and who cares about Kendall? 😛 Besides, he’s not underaged. You told me he’s nineteen, and Rain is eighteen. They’re both legally adults.
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
True.
It has to work with the story, okay? Eponine is fifteen/sixteen when she goes to the barricade, so there we go. 😛
Poor Kendall. No one cares about him.
I’ll try to fix it up. In another draft. Not now.
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
Oh yeah. That part I was really struggling with because I already consider it beyond my usual humour. That scene was meant to poke fun at poetic language and at obnoxious heroines who think they are too ‘smart’ and ‘deep’ compared to other girls. I felt I was making it too obvious.
Carefully explained and diagrammed? I’m not that bad! 🤣
Oh if you enjoy the absurd, there is a certain scene in Part II which I think you will like 😉
Actually, I’m surprised by the inconsistencies and problems you guys have pointed out to me, when it seems that you missed the two that have bothered me the most.
a). Jean leaves his daughter all alone in the trench in order to rescue Justice who he doesn’t even like.
b) Justice was originally seven years older than Chessy.
And these two things have tortured me and apparently no one else? It’s very strange. 😛 😀
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
@valtmy No, you weren’t making it too obvious, it worked fine for me. 😉
Oh, oh! Haha, I’m so sorry! I just realized how that sounded. I didn’t mean that you don’t understand jokes unless they’re explained to you. I meant that you prefer more realistic circumstances, as you were pointing out how the nurses and doctor didn’t act professionally, but that was the whole point of my story. 😛
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
@seekjustice Um, yeah, but children’s rights hadn’t been discussed yet in the 1700s…
Setting your story in the present day/future means that the cultural things won’t all match up with the circumstances in Les Mis. Such as the thing I talked to you a long time a go about, with Sapphire being looked down upon, which is not so much a thing anymore.
Hey, I’ll answer your other questions in a bit. Family worship, got to run.
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
The 1830s. 😛 My inner history nerd must correct you.
Very true, but our culture is hypocritical in the extreme. We still see prostitution as a bad thing in the present day, and a shameful thing, even if we don’t have any morals regarding pregnancy and children out of wedlock like we did back then.
I can see that Jonas, Quillon and Jean would have a problem with Chessy fighting (0r rather, working as a nurse, because she doesn’t actually fight) due to their personality and their beliefs though.
INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.
@seekjustice Haha, okay. I thought that it was set during the French Revolution. I don’t know a lot of French history, mostly where French history interconnected with the history of other countries. What exactly happened in the 1830s that Les Mis was set during that period?
Okay, so about Jean leaving Chessy in the trench, yeah, he should probably have looked for her first. I don’t know how that should be solved, except he could say he saw her escape or something and decided to save Justice afterward because he knew Chessy loved him, just like everyone in the entire world knew… 😛
And as for Justice being seven years older than Chessy, I have absolutely no problem with that. One of my favorite couples, Laura and Almanzo, were ten years apart, and they were married for…well, he died when he was past ninety, I think, so that would be over sixty years. I’m nineteen, and I wouldn’t mind marrying a guy who’s anywhere between nineteen and twenty-six or twenty-seven. The only problem I’d have is if the guy is younger than the girl, but since girls mature faster than guys in their teens and early twenties, it usually makes sense for a girl to marry a guy who’s a few years older than she is in order for their maturity levels to be similar.
I agree that seven years is a lot when she’s only seventeen, but in Stars it’s only a crush, and girls can have crushes on anyone at any age. So, that’s not a problem. However, since you plan for them to get together, (poor Zac, 🙁 ) it might make people more comfortable if you made him only three or four years older than she is.
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
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