Rylie Goodwin

@felicity

I am wondering though, Ludwika and Michał, are they just being obnoxious brother and sister, or is there conflict in this family? Because it may just be me, but they felt rather strained.

And what draft is this?

@felicity

Wow. I like your set up. You did a very good job of an intro.

I did feel like some things were a little too stated, and perhaps not quite smooth. You did a very good job though. I enjoyed it, and will be hoping for more!

And I should probably read more contemporary fiction. It was a little bit funny on my side to be reading about cell…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76 @elishavet-pidyon  @godlyfantasy12

Eira

The sidewalk was hard and my feet yearned for the soft dirt around the orphanage. Still, I kept up a vigorous pace. I’d be late if I didn’t hustle. My backpack kept shifting with each step, numbly jarring my back, but I had a rythum, and it worked. In a few more seconds I was within sight…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76 @wilder-w @koshka @godlyfantasy12

I’m on and about to RP. Sorry it’s taken a bit.

@freedomwriter76

Great chapter!

Um, here’s a thought from another side of things. Maybe don’t use it here, but it could be useful later? I don’t know.

There are other perfectly accurate ways to cover what Ruler has done, one of which I believe would work quite well. Instead of trying to hide it, have him say something like, “there are many ways…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

NOOOO!!!!!

@godlyfantasy12

Okay, I’ve been a bit worried for our little lad. As long as Ara can keep with him he’ll be fine. (I really love those two)

@freedomwriter76

AHHHH! I love it!

So, the normal human being part of me is horrified, but the history nerd author? She grinned through most of those chapters whispering “she got it right. She got it right!”

Although I am still a tad bit confused over their whole ‘still living in the same house as their father even though their Jews…’. this…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76 @elishavet-pidyon  @godlyfantasy12

I’ve been waiting for his elven flame since I first learned about it!!!! It was AWESOME!

Okay, so maybe I’m being a tad dramatic, but I did say I’ve been waiting a long time.

I can try to RP, only I don’t really know what to have anyone say or do, so I a little lost.

@freedomwriter76

Well then, Erich, Almarrin, maybe you two should run into each other. Although, is Erich going to the club? If so Almarrin can wait, but if not…who’s going to keep the ‘winged brats’ distracted enough not to notice their brother’s gone?

@freedomwriter76  @godlyfantasy12

I’m with you! *Cracks knuckles* Let’s go track them down.

Almarrin

The hall was quiet like a testing field right before the bomb blew. Or maybe more like the silence of the aftermath.

Avoiding notice, Almarrin slipped down the hall and vanished behind the office door. All was quiet on the other side.…[Read more]

Oops, poor fellow. I’d better hunt him down.

@godlyfantasy12

Ahh, gotcha. I just was suddenly wondering, “where are my characters again?” XD

@godlyfantasy12

Oh, and is Inglor still with Luna?

@godlyfantasy12

Okay, that will make more sense for her arc…and be even more wonderfully confusing for characters. XD

I think Elishavet set it up so you could show up whenever. =)

Wow. Look what happens when I step off for a day. These were really fun to read through!

@godlyfantasy12

Eira is an Alve, although she has Forester blood too. Without an idea of who she is, she has been raised in an orphanage that doesn’t believe the Light exists, and that the Alven are mere fairy tales. She is taught first of all the Light, t…

[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12 @koshka @freedomwriter76 @keilah-h @wilder-w

Winton

He set a box of plastic cutlery beside the space where the pizza would go. The fruit and vegetable tray was in the little fridge in the corner of his office. Everything was basically ready.

Chairs for the club members were set around a long table in the center of the room. The…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

@freedomwriter76

Sounds good to me! We will be having dinner soon, however, and church soon after that. (There’s a missionary friend of our family coming ; I’m sooo excited!)

So, I’ll go ahead and do a little one of Winton preparing for it.

@freedomwriter76

That’s a good part too. I did say it was ONE of my favorites…

I just like blowing stuff up. *Face palm* XD

But the one to one conversations are priceless!

Also, in that last one, I love the mildly creepy way you described Felix. *Shudder* 🙂

@freedomwriter76

Ah, perfect! That was such a pleasure to read. I love these characters!

And their dynamic and descriptions are superb! I love seeing them interact.

The whole thing was really good, especially for a first draft. One of my favorites is the opening, but I have a soft spot for guerrilla warfare and resistance groups (should I have…[Read more]