Liberty

@koshka

Wow!! You did catch it!

That’s impressive.

that would be about the time. He had this almost horrifying relief that he hadn’t been killed, he didn’t know what on earth to do with Leon’s sacrifice and felt bound to help him in some sort of payment, but once Leon was on the road to recovery there was nothing left for him.

@ellette-giselle

I was wondering how early on you saw it coming? I did a teeny, tiny bit of foreshadowing, but I’ll be very surprised if it was really picked up on as much as it just felt realistic when the scene actually came head on.

Hmm. Well, by the time Leo was getting conscious again and Ian wouldn’t make contact with him but kept slipping o…[Read more]

@loopylin

Chase

Chase watched Felicity open the can, his eyes slowly turning purple as the soda came pouring out the top.

“So, yeah. You just flip up the tab. Like I did, except more… carefully.”

Chase made eye contact with her, his eyes a purple the shade of a violets’ petals. He nodded, less shyly than he previously had, more sure of himse…[Read more]

@koshka

No prob!!

Rory

Rory watched in stunned silence as the woman raced about, Leo trailing her and trying to catch things she knocked over in her haste. She was rattling on about something, but Rory was having a hard time tracking. It wasn’t that he was unable to take in her words… he most certainly was, along with every object and…[Read more]

@keilah-h

Haha, well, you and everyone else. (except Linus. He says he saw it coming, and I’m wondering if he caught on to something, or has read enough of my stuff that he guessed it was something I would do. 😂)

 

Is Leon going to heal now that this new slave master is kinder to them and won’t make him work as hard as he did?

🤷🏼‍♀️

There i…[Read more]

@koshka

I also liked the way Leon realizes he’s dying, and that he doesn’t have much time left to work here. The urgency that comes over his actions was real to me.

Oh yeah, I see that. There definitely is an urgency.

And then the whole “you’re crazy but I still kinda admire your attitude” thing was funny, but unfortunately real.

🤣 I like Albe…[Read more]

@liberty

I really like him, and he’s very intriguing. He sounds like a character that could demand an entire book of his own! He reminds me of the monks who bought Squanto.

I was literally thinking, “This guy needs his own book!” while I was editing! 🤣

Oh wow, that’s brutal. But those are the stories I love best!! Stories of REAL s…[Read more]

@koshka

Wow!!!

*sits there and reads with mouth open* I had no idea I did all that!!

BUT ACTUALLY

*clears throat and nods* of course of course… it’s all with the flows of literary design and technique. 😂

It’s actually really cool seeing you lay it out like that, because I had no idea I had done that.

@linus-smallprint

You know what, I was thinking that while I was editing yesterday morning!! 😂

When I hear this name, I think of an old, kindly grandfather.

Um…… you’re off by like 40 years.

I would peg this guy in his late 30s. Maybe early 40s.

It wasn’t too long ago that he was still physically fighting the slave trade, and he was a…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

No soup…….?

*paces around room. Tries to understand why that’s funny. Knows that once it is explained I will remember why it was funny*

@freed_and_redeemed

YAY!!! SCENE!!!

Oh dear. Poor Riker…….. This is a bit of a fix.

@freed_and_redeemed ^^

@freedomwriter76 Great scene! *sniffles* 💔😭

@the_lost-journal That’s exciting! Hopefully it works!

@ellette-giselle

Sorry this one is long. I just had too much fun.

Leo

A grin rugged at his lips. He turned to encompass the entire hall with it’s gold name plates and carved enamel in a wave of his hand. “Welcome to Destina Elite Lounge Rooms, also known as the administration offices. Here’s where the head of the school departments come to work…[Read more]

@freed_and_redeemed

*Visible anguish*

You just…leave us…with that?!?

Cruelty of an author. Misuse of cliffhangers. Undeniable suspense.

Ahhhhhhhh…

…

Great job! I don’t like any of these guys. Except Riker of course. And Leon, wherever he is right now…

And though I’ve felt sorry for Franz,  he abused a child.

So yeah. Anxiously…[Read more]

@the_lost-journal

Sorry for taking so LONNNGGGG to reply!

Well now we’re even because I took FOREVER to reply as well!! 🤣 So sorry!!! 😭

Oh, yeah I should’ve mentioned that! About how mega churches are almost always portrayed badly. (Ofc there are some awful mega churches.) But what I mean about “giving them a good church experience” is truly b…

[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Yes, of course girl!! <333

@savannah_grace2009

Thanks!! <33

one thing I’ll suggest, is that I feel like you don’t really introduce the family to us in the first few chapters. At first I wasn’t even sure if Blake was their sibling or not XDXD

They do have a HUGE family, so setting a solid foundation and making all the siblings and the parents unique and established in ou…

[Read more]

@freed_and_redeemed

Wyoh apparently doesn’t like to notify me when you tag me 😑 Anywayyyy Loved the scene! But also feel so bad for Riker!! 😥

@the_lost-journal

Oh cool! Awesome!!

@godlyfantasy12 Poor November and Ara😭

BUT I LOVE THE SCENES

Callan is…💀 and I ADORE Ara’s uncle already🤭

and I think you portrayed that scene very well without going into explaining it completely and rather leaving it vague.

Job very well done👏👏👏