Anatra

@godlyfantasy12

Ooo, wonderful tension! The things authors love to create yet struggle to write.

It sounds good so far; the emotions seem balanced to me.

How would Ara respond to November being hurt? How did she want to respond to Riven?

At this point it looks like she’s about to explode, which could manifest itself in various ways depending…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

I’ll need to check this, but it sounds like the wounds close up, but be scar tissue grows. Anyway I’ll be back on here once I’ve done some research.

@lydia-s

Ooo, here’s one I found recently.

@freedomwriter76 @elishavet-pidyon @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Vulkasin

Loud voices. The beginning of an argument. Shuffling feet on cold stone.

The barrack…

Something was digging into his side. Vulkasin tried rolling over, but the thing followed his movement. He finally forced open one eye.

The cross piece and pommel on his sword.

Why did I…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

Awwwww.

My heart has melted.

@freedomwriter76 @koshka @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Yes, I’d say this has escalated. XD

Alyona

Screeches and hisses filled Alyona’s ears, driving rest from her mind. She flew to her feet, heart pounding, looking for a broom – anything really.

Two animals were locked together in feirce combat. Around them hovered two children, faced stricken…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76 @koshka @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Aww, Naja is adorable. And she even looks a little like Riker!

I’ll go ahead and respond.

Viktor

Morning was here. Viktor lay perfectly still, watching the sunlight soak the walls.

His back ached, but his head had escaped injury.

He’d woken once in the… Earlier morning, just as he was…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76

(sorry for my late response. I don’t check KP as much as I should. XD)

But YESSS!!!!! You should!!! I hope you enjoy them. A NIGHT DIVIDED WAS AMAZING!!!!!! *high fives* I think it’s a must-read for any historical fiction lover!!!

@freedomwriter76 @elishavet-pidyon @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Mikkel

Rat-tat-tat

Screams, loud garbled voices. Zeroing in on his target, safety off.

Another kick shatters the door. Three more steps.

His feet pound down the stairs, racing against time. Flames snatch at his legs, slowing him down.

Another door swings open sending a stream of…[Read more]

@godlyfantasy12

I concur! That sounds like a good plan to me.

@daisy-torres @r-m-archer thank you both

yeah i know amazon isn’t great to support but if it works… gotta pick the lesser of the evils and difficulties i guess lol

I’ll check out LuLu though

@godlyfantasy12

Grimmy? Oh my, that’s… adorable. I can see how Lyn is with nicknames.

(Of course they stay snarky. Brothers are snarky.)

@godlyfantasy12

But I won’t be for long, because I actually have to get up tomorrow before nine. (Or eight for that matter. Yikes! 😉 )

@godlyfantasy12

I’m on.

And I love your response, by the way! Nyx is hilarious, and the rest were just, oh my heart.

@freedomwriter76 @elishavet-pidyon @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Mikkel

This room wasn’t a very defensible position, but if the window was filled with sand bags- non-existent sand bags…

Hours upon hours of filling thousands of sandbags…

Mikkel lay down with his back to the door, his rifle beside him where he could keep his hand on it. With his…[Read more]

Of course, Naja probably didn’t like getting separated from her daddy, but I guess she likes Eva. Or doesn’t mind if Nyx is there to cuddle. XD I don’t know, I’ll let her author figure that out. 😉

@freedomwriter76 @koshka @keilah-h @godlyfantasy12

Okay, so I’ll try to get things moving along.

Alyona

“Good night.” Alyona called after Viktor as he and the rest of the boy-men left the room the girls had moved to. It was right above the one with the window and Alyona couldn’t help but think that this was how a sheep must feel when her…[Read more]

@queen_of_alvastia

You’re fine! =) It is an interesting tool though, but a hard one all the same.

@freedomwriter76

Good! (It was.)

Thank you, that makes me so happy. Although, not that I’m happy that you’re crying, which I wouldn’t be, but you know. 😉

That should mean it’s touching; that it moved my audience. XD

@godlyfantasy12

Ah, I love it!

*Sobs*

It’s so, so… Satisfying? Nit that she does, but that’s such a good way to build…[Read more]

@queen_of_alvastia

ONLY DO IT IF IT WILL HELP THE STORY! If the book’s good as is I wouldn’t add one just to deepen it.

It may cause trauma you don’t need.

*Weeps*