Koshka

@raxforge

Haha! That’s awesome!

@savannah_grace2009

Okay, well, I am reading! *Shoves all the motivation your way* I will give you some comments and some in-depth thoughts! Hopefully these are what you’re looking for.

Comments (as I’m going through) –

– Characters are very easy to picture, and not very easy to forget. XD So you’re good in that area.

– Prose flows smoothly…[Read more]

@keilah-h

It’s in the update on her profile. 🙃

@ellette-giselle

but i prefer this method

As someone who does Jiujitsu, that meme made my day, lol

@theducktator

LOL

@loopylin

Hey! Another 21 pilots fan! I would say they are my favorite band

@keilah-h

what?!? google is dumb. lololololol.

That’s OLD British slang. (came about in WWI)

It means “awesome.”

Cracking Ace!

@whalekeeper

That’s alright, no worries. I get that a lot.

It;s not a bad thing! I love interesting people.

(I hope you didn’t take that wrong. when people say that to me it’s always in a not nice way. Sorry if I came across like that!)

@keilah-h

I love the word cricky, and it was the first thing that came to mind. I was going to substitute it with a more American option, but then realized you would be someone who could appreciate a good British/Australian exclamation, so I left it.

A little if both I would say.

@liberty

Ah, so it is.

I forgot they had the same name! lol.

@ellette-giselle

Great! That’s a great trope to break.

Ernst is the name of Josef’s son in CR, right?

@liberty

Yeah, it must be the fact that I’m breaking a story trope where the wild animals always attack.

Yep! This is a German/Roman hybrid. The German just hasn’t come out much until now.

And…you created another Ernst?

Sorry?

@ellette-giselle

I just read your latest section. I was struck by how German their names are!😂 And…you created another Ernst?

Haha! I’ve had others complain that the wolves DIDN’T attack! XD.

Then, I’m extremely glad I told you my input. The animals do not have to attack every single time! *shaking head* So unrealistic.

@liberty

I think Leon should be the one to try explaining things. It would seem to fit his character…and give him something to say since he doesn’t say anything until “Julian, run!”

Leon is still trying to gather his thoughts and figure out what Julian just jumped into…. lol.

Got that about the river.

Haha! I’ve had others complai…[Read more]

@keilah-h

Hmm, I will remember to choose a fork for a weapon next time someone throws me into a tournament.

@ellette-giselle

My thoughts on Section 2:

“We don’t believe in the gods of the Empire,” Julian cut in.

There was a stunned silence.

“We worship the One true God,” Julian explained.

I think Leon should be the one to try explaining things. It would seem to fit his character…and give him something to say since he doesn’t say anything until “Ju…[Read more]

@koshka

All people are weird in their own way, some more dramatically than others. It’s the “normal” ones that usually scare me.

Those are the kinds of people who are average and forgettable enough to be spies, you see.

@loopylin

Why thank you. Glad to be your local online conundrum ✨

<3

@ellette-giselle

Loopy never seemed weird to me.

Oh she’s…[Read more]

@keilah-h

Oh I thought it was funny. No worries!

@whalekeeper   @loopylin

wHaT!??

Loopy never seemed weird to me.

Funny thing, Whaley, I couldn’t make head or tale of YOU for forever!! Still not sure if i have.  XD