hybridlore

@ellette-giselle

Hah, yes!

Sure! By the way, I liked the moodboards you already posted. Amber’s was really pretty. *is now remembering that name, and wonders when she is coming into the story*

I see similarities between Joseph’s story and this one. It feels like we’re going to time jump (also, you said that this story is about a young man……[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

KP just ate my post and went really weird…

I like Jim a lot.

I knew his parents were going to die once they hid Jonathan, but before that, no.

Does the story time jump after this, or does the whole book happen when Jonathan is nine?

@ellette-giselle

Poor Jonathan… 😭😭😭

The chapters were really good.

@ellette-giselle

I was not expecting it at all!! 😂🥺

@ellette-giselle

Ahem. Sorry. I meant to say, I don’t know if the glitch is on my side or yours. Probably mine.

and yeah, I could access the chapters, it just took a sec to reload so maybe that’s what I needed to do yesterday.

Now… 314???????!

And Jonathan!!!!

nothing to note in these really. I enjoyed them.

@grcr It would be such a cool comic!

@ellette-giselle

Ohhh, gotcha.

I don’t know, let me check.

@ellette-giselle

I was going to, but it wouldn’t let me sign in with my alt account and I didn’t want my main on there for all to see.

I don’t think I’ve heard of Equilibrium—is that a movie or a book?

@whalekeeper

Which plot twist? The one about Jonas’s dad?

@ellette-giselle

It was right around when Sara burst out at Jonathan.

I don’t know… I like Don. 😅 And Jonathan.

also, have you read the Giver? This book reminds me a lot of that so far.

@ellette-giselle

It worked!

I liked these chapters. You did a great job of increasing the tension. I did notice that you briefly switched into Sara’s POV during the first chapter, then went back to Jonathan. I would fix that.

Great job!

@ellette-giselle

They’re not showing up on the link for me.

@liberty

Gotcha.

@savannah_grace2009 Have fun!! 😁

@liberty

I definitely got that difference, but having you explain it helped even more.

Is Jace younger than the others? You described him as a boy multiple times.

Guy… we didn’t really get much there, but I got the impression he is haunted by his past. Lol.

@theducktator

I do all the time and randomly remember during the day. XD

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aIjmMlC28TT3c9eMUpg1-9ASZ71vtWpJMhcSz_dmI_Y/edit?usp=drivesdk

I’ll send the Word link to your email, if you want that one too.

@linus-smallprint

I think we are almost two thirds in?

Okay, sounds good. If needed, you can always catch up after your break.

@ellette-giselle @whalekeeper @keilah-h @linus-smallprint (Hey, do you still want to be tagged on this since I know you’re taking a break soon?) @theducktator

New chapters are out!

@ellette-giselle

I think the first chapter works pretty well! There was a bit of space in between Jonathan’s time in school and him talking to his brother that sort of felt like filler, but I’m not really sure what else you could put there so it might be fine for a first chapter to introduce the characters and the world.

One note: I was very…[Read more]

@liberty

Wow, I really liked reading this! Are you planning to use the characters in a novel?

The POVs seemed pretty different, I think. Obviously, the longer we spend with the characters, the more we’ll get to know them and see their differences, but I got the impression that Zahn was the peacemaker, Kyler likes to tease and instigate things,…[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Yeah, that’s understandable. I’m sorry 😢 🤗 But hopefully you have a great time at camp! I’ll continue to pray for you guys!

I’ve been doing pretty good! Just started math again so I can finish my class by next year. So… yeah. 😅

@theducktator Praying!