Ellette Giselle

@ellette-giselle I agree with @hybridlore ‘s statements! I think that bit about Leon’s reaction might’ve been what I felt was missing from the scene.

@ellette-giselle

Sorry, didn’t get tagged yesterday. I think Linus has a valid concern about the scene with Julian and Dian, but moving the scene where Julian shares the Gospel with him to a day or so later would fix it, in my opinion.

I think it was nice to see Julian argue with God a little bit. It’s slightly a different reaction than you…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Yup. Julian got hit hard….

Also, I have a character named Julian as well! He was once a haughty prince…until he got turned into a unicorn. My story was a twist of the “Frog Prince”.

@ellette-giselle

“For You, God, tested us; You refined us like silver.”

I read that verse today!

 The next day, Roland was ready to go on, but there was no sign of Rolf and Leon.

Wow. He’s healing fast. I had a sprain before and it took 2 whole weeks to heal!

Oooh! I love Dian!

“Dian! Kom hier. Ek het jou hulp nodig.”

I think I know what he’s say…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle If it works better for your story to chuck it, then do that, but save the concept for later cause I found it really interesting, and I’m sure others would too.

@keilah-h @hybridlore @ellette-giselle @the_lost-journal @liberty @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint

Oof, it’s been two weeks. Well, here’s the third chapter, please tell me what you think once you’re done reading it. This is a shorter chapter, so I’ll probably post the fourth tomorrow.

Chapter 3

“That’s lovely.” Elina sat down, an uncom…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle Weirdly enough, I actually kinda liked Julian’s POV. It was interesting to see someone who was technically monotheistic, but it wasn’t the true God, and how Julian reacted to that. I feel like even if you chuck the story for now, you should save the concept for either later in the book or a different one.

@ellette-giselle

Understandable.

I have also just considered making up a world with my friends and doing our own fantasy RPG in it.

@ellette-giselle

btw, do you like RP type games?

I’ve kind of wanted to get into D&D, but with a group of Christians so that we can do a campaign without anything the anyone feels uncomfortable with. My friends has tried to start a Star Wars one a fet times, but that had never worked out.

That War Story: Occupied France sounds kind of neat, but I…[Read more]

@theducktator @ellette-giselle

Okay. Thank you both. I might wait to see what @whalekeeper thinks, but your responses are helpful.  I could add a moment of clarity where he realizes what he is doing when he is too close to the village and gets caught up in the fight, even if he plans to escape.

@ellette-giselle

That makes sense. However again, different people would react differently.

But what about when he wakes up?

@ellette-giselle

I love Mateo 😂😅

@ellette-giselle

This could be interesting to try…. but I’m not sure Julian and Leon feel like that sort of person…….. do either of them feel that way to you?

I guess both of them do seem to be confident individuals. Julian is certainly a blame others type, considering his reaction to Adrian’s death. Leon, I’m not so sure about it.

I’m just re…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Is it bad that it was reversed?

I wounldn’t say so. It just makes this scene feel more like a moment where Joseph/Arron is struggling then Noah/David encourages or seems stronger.

Hmm…. I might possibly chuck that section altogether………..

Up to you.

Well….. I think that might be because that tends to be what happens to me when I’m…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

What if he stops for the night? (Which he will need to do. Nearland can be reached in a day on horseback from Dehn Prisson, but someone walking would have to take a break.) Do you think it would cross his mind then?

@ellette-giselle @theducktator @whalekeeper

Okay, another question for all of you. I’m wondering if Alan would even return to the abandoned village. After he escapes the prison, he starts heading there since he has nowhere else to go in the moment, but then it occurs to him that the Wizards will probably look for him there. His friends are in…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Well that is exactly how you should picture him! Bravo! 👏🏻

Wow. That’s like… a first for me.

I thought about having a POV for him….. but that will start fracturing into lots of POVs and the question will be, “Why Rolf over Aelic and Roland?” and then I’ll have five POVs going.

Yup. Well, no need to go into Rolf’s head.…

@ellette-giselle @theducktator @whalekeeper

All right. Thank you for your thoughts. I might try the first draft with the henchmen, and if I don’t like them, I can pull them out later.

Acctually, the sarcastic henchmen who always wonder how they ended up with their job are some of the henchmen I like, but I don’t think that fits TNPT, so I’ll see…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Leon’s prayer at the beginning was what I was expecting to be going through Rolf’s head instead, then Leon being the one who encourages as he has gone through so much more. I was supprised when it was reversed!

I’m not convinced by Julian telling Dian the gospel in that moment. Both before and after, he is caught in grief over…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

That’s insane, but yeah, at least the class all knew it was wrong. Thanks for the inspiration!