-
Keilah H. replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
@ellette-giselle Ooooh! I didn’t expect Qayid and Rolf to be the same person, but I’m happy he and Leon were reunited. I wonder what’ll happen to Albee, although I’m glad Leon and Ian weren’t separated at least.
Is Leon going to heal now that this new slave master is kinder to them and won’t make him work as hard as he did?
Also, I think this…[Read more]
-
Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
By the way, in The War to End All Wars, the guy actually gave his life to the other man. It was so sad…the story is about these American soldiers who are captured by the Japanese.
I don’t remember all the details, but one of the prisoners was caught doing something…and he and two other men were going to be executed. But the…[Read more]
-
Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
So, this is really cazy because I never thought this scene was one of my best!! 😂
It’s a stunning scene! I LOVE it!!
I’m so happy! I posted it and I was like, “Liberty’s gonna love this!!!”
You were so right!
So, what do you think of Kareem and his story???!
I really like him, and he’s very intriguing. He sounds like a charact…[Read more]
-
Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Okay. XD
- It directly applied to today. Ian was hopeless. Utterly hopeless. And there really wasn’t anything better than Heaven itself to offer him. Most people today are already living in hell. They need to know heaven is real.
- We saw that suicide attempt coming, even though you didn’t spell that out. And then you thwarted a…
-
Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Did you get snow???
Yes. Up here in Canada, we’ve gotten snow as late as May.
Maybe I’ve been writing too many Nazi POVs.
Probably. No soup for you.
-
Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Seems like Leon takes some pride in his strength. I wounder if he is not just working for the glory of God anymore, but also to prove he still can.
“Oh yes,” Caleb replied. “As good a master as any slave could want! He is just and kind. We are almost free here. We do the work required–– which is a fair amount–– and then we are f…
-
Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
ROLF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh my gosh, Ellette!! I literally cried happy tears when I read that!!!
WOW oh WOW!!!!!!
I’m SO happy! This entire section was phenomenal!!! The part when Leon saves Ian…when Leon…[Read more]
-
Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Where did you come from?!?! 😂
*Wiggles fingers mysteriously* Narnia…
I wonder what is hooking everyone so much about this section?! Why do y’all like it so much?
I guess it felt well balanced to me, better than some of the others. You did more show than tell; your characters were interacting with each other and their own st…[Read more]
-
Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
@ellette-giselle @theducktator @keilah-h @stephie @whalekeeper
Okay, the prologue is out now. I’m a bit missy with the point of view in there, but I am trying not to care right now.
If you encounter ${ } in my writing, this just means that I am using a placeholder.
Now I need to go shovel.
-
hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
I just find the whole idea of his story interesting, and the different ways he has gone about fighting the slave-trade.
Definitely.
I wonder what is hooking everyone so much about this section?! Why do y’all like it so much? 😂
I don’t know! Maybe it was really well written or something. Also, just the events were super i…[Read more]
-
Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
It’s Rolf! XD I was expecting someone from Vandalia or somewhere like that, not Rolf.
And yeah. I actually read the chapters in my email to avoid spoiling, although it does mean I often forget to comment.
But oooooo, I liked this chapter. Definitely ready for the next one.
(And I still don’t think this book is darker than the…[Read more]
-
hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
It’s a weird system, okay. 😂 I try not to cheat, but . . . it’s hard. I need to know what button to press. 😝
Well, like, the podium for this book, which includes Leon, Julian, and Ian. I think. xD
He seems like a good guy. His backstory sorta reminded me of Julian’s, just cause they both lost their little brother.
-
hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Well . . . ahem . . .
I sort of kind of saw that “It was Rolf.” before I read the section, since I had to scroll down to the bottom of the email to get to Kingdom Pen.But, no, I don’t think I would have. I was still a little surprised, because I didn’t realize Quayid was going to be Rolf. But I knew someone was going to be…[Read more]
-
hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Rolf!!! 😁
Wow, I really liked that section. That might have been my favorite part so far. I love Ian. He’s the best.
(And poor Albee, but I have a feeling he’s going to seek God out now that Leon’s gone…?)
-
Koshka replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 1 month ago
Leo
The elevator rattled on its assent, nearly drowning out the kid’s quiet words. Leo leaned back against the smooth metal wall an, enjoying the rythmic click of well built machinery even if it was a bit rough. His thumbs hooked into his belt.
“Ah, me too, kid. A title’d probably make it that much harder to be inconspicuous.”…[Read more]
-
Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
@theducktator @ellette-giselle
Yeah, but the other reason to do it is to refresh the reader’s memory of the previous book. Notice that while Alcatraz complains about it, he still does it. The trick is to include it naturally instead of going out of your way to do it. So I hope to find a way to do that.
I think I will just stick with people who…[Read more]
-
Keilah H. replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
@ellette-giselle I can get behind having a gun and a shield inside the pulpit. He’s well prepared.
I don’t think my church has ever had a shooting in our area, but we still have people guarding around. I work in the pre-k Sunday school, and sometimes, if the weather’s nice, we take the kids over to the playground we have just outside the…[Read more]
-
Linus Smallprint started the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
All right, I’ve done enough outlining now that I feel ready to start officially writing draft one of The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword! Whew!
So this means that soon, I will be posting chapters! I think for this one, instead of using Reedsy, I will use Google docs. (I will probably use Reedsy for a later draft). It will be under…[Read more]
-
hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
Leon!!! I didn’t think you would kill him!!
I didn’t feel like the overseers punishing Leon instead of Ian was unrealistic. However, I’m starting to wonder what Ian did to deserve it. I know they’d had their eyes on him, but all he did was trip, right?
Julian’s scene was good too. I liked how it started raining and they were…[Read more]
-
Keilah H. replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 1 month ago
@ellette-giselle So Leon’s life was spared! I’m interested to see where this is going, then.
And Julian’s fire incident was a sad thing, but it’s true that such a thing happens. Even here in America we have the occasional church shootout or similar incident. Haven’t heard of church arson much (here in the US anyway) but it’s entirely possible.
- Load More
