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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Um…… you’re off by like 40 years.
Well, maybe he will be a grandpa some day.
Speaking of…… any thoughts on his back story?
Umm… Perehapes he was a slave, or at least treated like one, earlier in his life, along with his brothers and cousins. They escaped, and tired to help other slaves.
So, how did you ‘know it’?…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
It’s 18 degrees Celcius outside and the warmest thing I wore today was a sweatshirt.
*chuckles because I get to say I’m Canadian whilst living in a Southern area of Canada*
Cheater.
Spoken like someone who doesn’t get 7 months of winter a year. I would happily swap my weather for yours, but this is the way it is. Oh wel…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Thank you, thank you. *Curtsey* XD
That’s what I thought. It also looked like he blamed himself a bit for what happened to Leon. Poor kid.
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Koshka replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 6 months ago
Leo
At last, space to work. The Plant Doctor lady was out in the hall guarding her pots and computer — emphasis on the pots — leaving him and Rory alone in the soggy office.
Now if they could just isolate the leak…
Rory made a strange sound behind him, like when Quincy had stuck an entire earaser in his mouth thinking it…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
I was wondering how early on you saw it coming? I did a teeny, tiny bit of foreshadowing, but I’ll be very surprised if it was really picked up on as much as it just felt realistic when the scene actually came head on.
Hmm. Well, by the time Leo was getting conscious again and Ian wouldn’t make contact with him but kept slipping o…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 6 months ago
Sorry this one is long. I just had too much fun.
Leo
A grin rugged at his lips. He turned to encompass the entire hall with it’s gold name plates and carved enamel in a wave of his hand. “Welcome to Destina Elite Lounge Rooms, also known as the administration offices. Here’s where the head of the school departments come to work…[Read more]
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freedom replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 6 months ago
@esther-c @keilah-h @ellette-giselle @koshka @elishavet-pidyon @godlyfantasy12 (btw, I’ve been LOVING the scenes you’ve been posting, girl🤩) @rae @theducktator @grcr @anyone-else-idk-lol
Y’all want a Riker scene for Book #3? 🫣
well here it is anyway (part of it at least)
What did Leon know?
As far as Riker knew, Leon had a good, loving…
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Keilah H. replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
@ellette-giselle Ooooh! I didn’t expect Qayid and Rolf to be the same person, but I’m happy he and Leon were reunited. I wonder what’ll happen to Albee, although I’m glad Leon and Ian weren’t separated at least.
Is Leon going to heal now that this new slave master is kinder to them and won’t make him work as hard as he did?
Also, I think this…[Read more]
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Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
By the way, in The War to End All Wars, the guy actually gave his life to the other man. It was so sad…the story is about these American soldiers who are captured by the Japanese.
I don’t remember all the details, but one of the prisoners was caught doing something…and he and two other men were going to be executed. But the…[Read more]
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Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
So, this is really cazy because I never thought this scene was one of my best!! 😂
It’s a stunning scene! I LOVE it!!
I’m so happy! I posted it and I was like, “Liberty’s gonna love this!!!”
You were so right!
So, what do you think of Kareem and his story???!
I really like him, and he’s very intriguing. He sounds like a charact…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Okay. XD
- It directly applied to today. Ian was hopeless. Utterly hopeless. And there really wasn’t anything better than Heaven itself to offer him. Most people today are already living in hell. They need to know heaven is real.
- We saw that suicide attempt coming, even though you didn’t spell that out. And then you thwarted a…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Did you get snow???
Yes. Up here in Canada, we’ve gotten snow as late as May.
Maybe I’ve been writing too many Nazi POVs.
Probably. No soup for you.
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Seems like Leon takes some pride in his strength. I wounder if he is not just working for the glory of God anymore, but also to prove he still can.
“Oh yes,” Caleb replied. “As good a master as any slave could want! He is just and kind. We are almost free here. We do the work required–– which is a fair amount–– and then we are f…
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Liberty replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
ROLF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh my gosh, Ellette!! I literally cried happy tears when I read that!!!
WOW oh WOW!!!!!!
I’m SO happy! This entire section was phenomenal!!! The part when Leon saves Ian…when Leon…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Where did you come from?!?! 😂
*Wiggles fingers mysteriously* Narnia…
I wonder what is hooking everyone so much about this section?! Why do y’all like it so much?
I guess it felt well balanced to me, better than some of the others. You did more show than tell; your characters were interacting with each other and their own st…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
@ellette-giselle @theducktator @keilah-h @stephie @whalekeeper
Okay, the prologue is out now. I’m a bit missy with the point of view in there, but I am trying not to care right now.
If you encounter ${ } in my writing, this just means that I am using a placeholder.
Now I need to go shovel.
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hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
I just find the whole idea of his story interesting, and the different ways he has gone about fighting the slave-trade.
Definitely.
I wonder what is hooking everyone so much about this section?! Why do y’all like it so much? 😂
I don’t know! Maybe it was really well written or something. Also, just the events were super i…[Read more]
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Koshka replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
It’s Rolf! XD I was expecting someone from Vandalia or somewhere like that, not Rolf.
And yeah. I actually read the chapters in my email to avoid spoiling, although it does mean I often forget to comment.
But oooooo, I liked this chapter. Definitely ready for the next one.
(And I still don’t think this book is darker than the…[Read more]
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hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
It’s a weird system, okay. 😂 I try not to cheat, but . . . it’s hard. I need to know what button to press. 😝
Well, like, the podium for this book, which includes Leon, Julian, and Ian. I think. xD
He seems like a good guy. His backstory sorta reminded me of Julian’s, just cause they both lost their little brother.
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hybridlore replied to the topic The Flames of Hope Saga Book 3: Land of Shadows in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 6 months ago
Well . . . ahem . . .
I sort of kind of saw that “It was Rolf.” before I read the section, since I had to scroll down to the bottom of the email to get to Kingdom Pen.But, no, I don’t think I would have. I was still a little surprised, because I didn’t realize Quayid was going to be Rolf. But I knew someone was going to be…[Read more]
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