Beth

@loopylin

I’m listening to it now XD XD

@theshadow

hey, I know you read the first couple chapters! I’d love to hear your thoughts/critiques on the recent chapters if you have any! But if you’re busy I totally get it, summer can be soooo hectic!

Instead of digging through all these posts, you can use this link to view the whole novel (what I’ve revised so…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Do you have any other thoughts on the chapters you’ve read?

Chapter 12

A Law

The sight that greeted Lilitu was like a cold slap in the face.

In front of the church stood three Pythonos, each with a dark horse by their side.

Jraldath, Selena, and Rrath.

A chill went down Lilitu’s spine. Unfortunately, the trio’s reputation preceded them—and it was covered with the blood of innocent victims.

The bells…[Read more]

@theducktator

Why do you always have the BEST memes?!?! Those are great XD

@whalekeeper

Girlll for a second I was scared you were gonna talk about my story and I was scared XD

yeah that’s hard.

I would just encourage her to talk to her parents about it. Maybe just gently talk to her about your concerns? She might (and will probably) get defensive, but still it’s worth a shot if you care about her that much.

I’m not…[Read more]

@keilah-h

Yeah I’ll think about doing something like that.

Again, sorry if that scene made you uncomfortable (or anyone else!)! <3

And thanks for reading my stuff!

@rae

Aww, I loved it!!

The only thing I’d recommend is to really deepen Chase’s pov, especially after he gives up his sight. Because it still felt like he could see with the way things were described. I think if you describe it in the way in which Chase was experiencing it, then it will have a much bigger impact.

Other than that it was good! (:

@theducktator

Haha I love em!

@rae

Aww that scene was sooo cute! <3

@whalekeeper

I feel like the blindness bit was too much? I mean for Chase to give up his sight as well as his mobility. It’s too on-the-nose for Chase’s character, since he often gets marked with physical things like scars, stuttering, and the mobility thing. I felt less sorry for him, and more “oh okay that happened.”Idk, it felt like waaaaay…

[Read more]

@freed_and_redeemed @savannah_grace2009 I have a Chase scene for you

@whalekeeper @loopylin @grcr @theducktator @esther-c @kielah-h @theshadow @ellette-giselle @anyone

I have a really sweet but sad Chase scene. For context, this is after Chase’s last battle with Narsa Jeptune.

oh, and beware, I’ve barely edited this. Criticism welcome 🙂

Chase…

[Read more]

@theducktar

I am the #1 banana hater, so none :p

@theducktator

6 or 7

@ellette-giselle

If you want to share your plot outline and story details, I could try to help you with a blurb!

@ellette-giselle

6 or 7!

@keilah-h

No no no! You didn’t offend me! I just felt bad for posting it XD

And you’re good I wasn’t upset or offended at all…I just you know, felt bad, and I’m sorry if that scene made you uncomfortable :/

I’m just saying that if I had picked up your fully written, published book and read it through, I might’ve felt a little iffy about the…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I think 7 looks the best.