Home Page › Forums › Fiction Writing › General Writing Discussions › A Place to share/write whatever we’re working on: Worldbuilding, plot, etc
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March 13, 2024 at 5:01 pm #177803
Aww, I love that!! Siblings dynamics are the best. XD
Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende
March 15, 2024 at 8:38 am #177850That was deep. I kinda want to read the rest of the story to see her journey. I love how you describe just enough, but not so much that I was drowning in it. That makes the character’s actions the centre point of the story. Not that I have anything against description, I just appreciate your style. 🙂
"Courage, dear heart." -Aslan
March 15, 2024 at 9:20 am #177854Ahhh I think Wyoh ate my post!
Thanks! I appreciate that! I hope to share some more of the story at some point, but right now most it is still not written out. I feel like I’ve been discovering what happens as I’m writing it, because I didn’t initially sit down with a plot in mind, but it’s just fallen together as I write. So there’s still a lot of holes and gaps in the story, but once I have some more of that filled in, I’ll share more!
"Real love is for your good, not for your comfort." -Justin Whitmel Earley
March 15, 2024 at 12:00 pm #177858Okay so I’ve been working on a lovely story which isn’t lovely but whatever which (both annoyingly and thrillingly) keeps evolving to the point where I’ve changed the plot at least twenty times. I would definitely not share a lot of what happens here, because there is killing and abuse in it. However, I think a snippet of this one scene would be alright.
So, now for tags: @trailblazer @theducktator @grcr @hybridlore @esther-c @whalekeeper
@savannah_grace2009 @whoeverImissedBefore I begin, just a bit of backstory: In my world, there are magical people. (Sorry for my lack of detailed vocab — I still need to find a better word for them.) There are two kinds of magic: light and dark. My main character, Aurora, is a dark magical. She is the Mistress of Night, which means she leads all the dark magicals sort of like a queen. She wants to rule Yintaria, my fictional country, and she has committed a LOT of *bad stuff* to do it. So she is both my protagonist, and my antagonist. Which I personally love writing. However, due to a lot of events I don’t want to go into, she’s sort of kind of changed. Here we go:
I drew a long breath and watched as he closed his eyes. His knuckles were white from gripping the arms of his throne, the throne which would soon be mine.
“Do it,” he said. “I want it over.”
I raised my sword and held it close against his neck. The black point drew a small trickle of blood, and I watched it run down his skin and stain his shirt. It had always been so easy: before, when my victims begged for mercy, pleaded for their lives, I had simply laughed and partaken in the thrill of their deaths. Why couldn’t I make myself feel what I had then? Why couldn’t I be what I ought to be — a cold blooded, murderous Mistress of Night? Prison did not do this to one’s heart.
I stepped shakily backwards, still pointing my blade at him, one foot on the top step of the dais. Darkness swirled around my view like a cloud of gnats. King Ephraim opened his eyes, revealing widened green-blue spheres. He began saying something, but my magic blocked out the noise and turned everything shadowy grey and black.
The last thing I saw before I turned to run was his mouth forming words I did not understand, words I could never decipher no matter how many times I played them out in my mind.
So there you have it. I know it’s short but I don’t feel like using up more of my hard earned screen time copying it down (and besides, the rest of that scene isn’t perfected yet).
"Courage, dear heart." -Aslan
March 15, 2024 at 12:08 pm #177859I’m intrigued… I don’t think I personally could write from the perspective of a villain of sorts, and I don’t know where your plot is going, but I can already see this turning into a redemption story. Even just that brief glimpse draws me in. Great job!
"Real love is for your good, not for your comfort." -Justin Whitmel Earley
March 15, 2024 at 12:36 pm #177862March 15, 2024 at 12:37 pm #177863I don’t think my last post showed up — sorry if you get this twice.
Thanks! I’ll have to work on it more so that I can eventually publish it *smiles dreamily at the ceiling* but it’s honestly hard to write from her perspective — kind of like trying to paint a wall black and white at the same time.
"Courage, dear heart." -Aslan
March 15, 2024 at 1:33 pm #177867Is it kind of an allegorical type of story?
"Real love is for your good, not for your comfort." -Justin Whitmel Earley
March 15, 2024 at 2:41 pm #177870Oooh! I like it!! I really love the concept of writing from an antagonistic protagonist’s POV. Because every “villain” thinks they’re doing the “right thing” or at least they justify their actions to make them seem okay. I’m already very intrigued!!
Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende
March 15, 2024 at 6:55 pm #177880Very intriguing! (I tried to find a synonym, since everyone else has used that word, but it’s a good word.) I like your character (as much as one could like a character who’s trying to murder someone), and I’m hoping for a redemption arc. I’d love to read more!
The squirrels are collecting more nuts than usual this winter. I've already lost 3 relatives.
March 16, 2024 at 9:49 am #177893Ooh, I like it! Aurora seems like a cool (and kinda scary) character. I really loved this snippet!
Any noun can become a verb if you don't care enough.
March 17, 2024 at 7:03 pm #178015@stephie oooh your scene sounds like we just got to the point where it’s really getting interesting.
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
March 21, 2024 at 11:30 am #178153I absolutely love it when I take a short break from creative endeavors, and when I come back, everything clicks together, I get a half dozen new character ideas, a new plot device occurs to me… I highly recommend taking week-long breaks, because this is awesome.
“Everything is a mountain”
March 21, 2024 at 12:55 pm #178159@loopylin @godlyfantasy12 @rae @whoever
Y’all GUESS WHAT. Marcel has a best friend now and I am in love with this character concept. Like I actually cannot. It’s so good. I can’t talk about it because I like to leave new characters to simmer for a week or so before I mess with them… but he needed a best friend and NOW HE HAS ONE
I will say she is cute <3
“Everything is a mountain”
March 21, 2024 at 3:59 pm #178163@whalekeeper awesome! She sounds like a cool character if she’s best friends with Marcel lol
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
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