snickerdoodle

@ellette-giselle

Hey, he can’t hear me. 🤭

Okay, cool. Looking forward to the next section!

@ellette-giselle

Gotcha. Yeah, no problem. He did faint, so there obviously was enough blood lost for that. You’re good! So, does this mean you’ll have to rewrite a lot of what you already have, or not much since you’re about to have Joseph leave?

@ellette-giselle

Overall, it was pretty good. Some of the dialogue towards the end felt a tiny bit clunky, though.

Very well,”” Eric sighed. “I shall bare the displays of emotion for tonight, but by tomorrow hugs will be limited to once a month.”

This is funny, but it sounds old-fashioned all of a sudden. Is Eric just teasing? Does he lapse i…[Read more]

@rae @raxforge I was kind of shipping you guys in my head already, but I didn’t want to say anything in case it was completely wrong. That’s cute though. 🥲💕

@ellette-giselle

1. It gives the reader more hope in a happy ending.

2. It’s more interesting because you play on the past events of the book to make readers think Asher and Eric will die, but then defy the stereotype, keeping them on their toes.

3. It saves Asher and Eric. 🤗

@ellette-giselle

YES! Much better. Thanks so so much!

@ellette-giselle

YESSSSSS!!! We convinced you!!! 🙌🙌

Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I can’t wait to see the new scene! 😁

having hybridlore on the protection squad is scary! Why did I ever tell her about it?

Because you wanted me to kidnap all your characters. MWAHAHAH.

@koshka

*graciously accepts confetti and medal* Thank you, thank you very much.

@koshka YES. Thank you.

@ellette-giselle

I’m the dangerous one? You’re the one with like, a 50% character mortality rate. 🤪 I feel sorry for your characters.

@ellette-giselle

WHOOHOO!!!!! 🥳🎉

@whalekeeper Glad you’re enjoying it. (I’m this close! 🤏)

@ellette-giselle

Lol. I am? 🥲

@ellette-giselle

Yeah. That makes sense.

Like the Imperial officers would just stand by and let him.

I know, but he could at least try. I think it would make his death more meaningful and give a bigger impact. But it’s up to you.

@ellette-giselle

Yeah, good point. Is there a way you could adjust his age, or is that set in stone?

Hmm… yeah, it could still work as a wake-up call, even if Asher’s not that young. To be honest, nineteen is pretty young to be executed though, especially if he (a.) wasn’t a soldier that betrayed their country, like Adrian, and (b.) has a young…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Hey, all the reasons people wanted to save Eric could apply to Asher too. He’s also young. He looks innocent… lol. Make them react more to both of them instead of just the younger one, maybe?

OR highlight how hurt Eric is by Asher’s death in front of the crowd. That’ll make them see how much it’s affecting families and hurting c…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

He can go with Joseph to that city!!! And be a missionary!!

Or he just continues as normal, except grieving for Asher… what does he even do right now? Go to school? Work? He could stay living with Sabina and the guys for a while.

@ellette-giselle

IT’S OKAY! We’ll pretend it never happened. It will get lost in the KP forums forever…

@ellette-giselle

HA! I actually have a chance?

Please, please, please…. 🙏 🥺 Think of all the scenes you could write!

Lolol

@ellette-giselle

That would make it more interesting, instead of just having more characters die off we’d get to see Eric struggling with his brother’s death.

@ellette-giselle

No no no no no!!!!!! 😭😭😭 Why are you doing this to me, Ellette? 😢

Can’t you just… save Eric?? 😭 They said he could go free…