@loopylin
Active 8 hours, 12 minutes ago- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 3959
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
Oh good, I’m glad Cass isn’t playing her. That was just horrible before.
So, since Cass is the perfect child (in Lilitu’s mind, I’d really like to see him fail in areas. Maybe in a way that Lilitu doesn’t even notice but the reader does. Ya know? Just my thoughts)
I liked this chapter a lot. Good job. One thing:
Liv had…[Read more]
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
YESSSSS!!!
Okay sounds good!!!!! Are you still writing your story? you should resend me the link, I’ve always loved your story! <3
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
OH! Ellette, you’re gonna be so happy… ( @theducktator and @grcr might also want to know this)
I have a recent development…
Cass is no longer going to be playing with Sef’s feelings.
He’s officially a nice guy again hahaha
Since Lilitu and Sef are separated for a good chunk of the book, there’s no opportunity for this to happen. Cass is…[Read more]
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
@ellette-giselle @anyone-else
Next chapter!!!
What am I doing?
Frustration built up in Lilitu’s chest until he wanted to scream.
But he couldn’t scream….or else Adar would find him.
Cass isn’t going to come bail you out this time, he pressed his lips together in a thin line. You have to figure it out yourself.
He tried to find a comfort…
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Keilah H. replied to the topic Free will in the forum Mission, Calling & Ethics 1 year, 9 months ago
@theshadow okay! I’ll be sure to share that with my family tonight.
Honestly, they probably are helping because they’re more light hearted and fun.
haha thanks.
(Not me trying to look up encouraging quotes from the squad but all I get is them insulting each other as always….lol)
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TheShadow replied to the topic Free will in the forum Mission, Calling & Ethics 1 year, 9 months ago
I’m so sorry you had to go through that.
It’s okay, thank you.
A real name, or a pseudonym if you’re uncomfortable with that.
Sure, I’ll share my middle name, Petra, if that’s fine. Thank you again, by the way.
Or, if somehow my goofy stories of pointless wars and animal people are helping you get through this, then I’m a little surpris…
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Enid replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy Book I: The Cost in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
I’m a third of the way through and I already have a lot of thoughts, so that’s good! I really like Tyn, by the way, favorite character.
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
I will!!!
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
Wonderful! Tag me when you do!
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
Okay great!!! hahaha!
Really??? That makes me really happy!!!! Thank you!!!! <3
Speaking of Eloy, I just wrote a funny Eloy scene (it’s kind of cheesy I think, but I’m going to edit it later.) I’ll post it in a little bit!!!
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Keilah H. replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 9 months ago
@anyone y’all want a villain rant?
also no context whatsoever hehe
“….I would’ve killed your little flightless twins, of course. Suffocated them in my coils before they knew what was happening.” she said, continuing from some time before we’d come in. She didn’t notice us there. “I would’ve loved to watch the look on your face when I came to…
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 9 months ago
I know. Can’t we just settle nicely in the middle instead of falling off the road on one side or the other? lol.
Anyhow, I think this movie is a fairly well done example of a strong girl who isn’t a long haired guy. I don’t agree with all her lines of thought/reasoning but still it’s a good example of staying more in the…[Read more]
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MineralizedWritings replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 9 months ago
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
Not at all. Tag me whenever you want.
This is a really good chapter. Well balanced dialogue, not cheesy on the emotions, but enough to make you feel them. Well done.
(I’m really hoping for more Eloy in this draft. *hint hint*)
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Ellette Giselle replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy Book I: The Cost in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
Now THAT might have just been your best chapter ever. I could feel Alan, I could sense that he was completely trust the Saviour, yet there was also pain with it, but his grief was quiet by now. If you could make the grief in the chapter before this more forceful then it would beautiful contrast to the calm in this one.
Very…[Read more]
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MineralizedWritings replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 9 months ago
I’m glad you liked it! And I’m glad it seemed more realistic than you thought it was going to be, that’s great. Yeah, not a fan of the outfit but I’m glad it was mostly in the trailer.
Yeah the whole tough girl thing is really interesting. It’s weird, but I have a theory to why it happens. For multiple issues, I think…[Read more]
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
@ellette-giselle @jonas (let me know if I’m tagging you too much, I know you’re probably busy!!!!) this goes for anyone else too, please let me know if you’d like me to stop tagging you lol @highscribeofaetherium @grcr @anyone-else
Here’s a second half of the Lilitu chapter:
(Again, this is unedited so this won’t be the finished product, this is…[Read more]
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 9 months ago
First of all, I don’t know if you had planned for Lilitu to have any more lasting injuries than some cuts and bruises, but from the level of beating he’s just received, he’s likely to have some cracked or broken ribs (which could damage internal organs), and/or a concussion. And if he was knocked out/unconscious for long…
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Keilah H. replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 9 months ago
@ellette-giselle yeah, “girl power” and whatnot is kinda way overblown these days.
Although in the past in many cultures, women were not exactly treated nicely (or sometimes even like people) either, so I think as a society we just kinda vacillate between “too much power” or “too little power” given to them.
not that that’s right, but it’s just…[Read more]
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Keilah H. replied to the topic Let's Laugh! Writing Memes in the forum Art 1 year, 9 months ago
@ellette-giselle lol
I mean, I don’t get the “it’s not Christmasy” thing, If it occurs during Christmas and has themes of Christmas, it is a Christmas movie. I’ve never seen it, but I just looked it up, and if you’re gonna call it “not a Christmas movie” then you might say the same for Home Alone or The Sound of Music, which are also popular…[Read more]
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