Linus Smallprint

@linus-smallprint

yes, this fixes everything.

am I the oldest?
guess!

😂

@linus-smallprint

Next time don’t tell me there is supposed to be a big plot twist in a chapter so I don’t be stoopid and search for more fish.

I only said it because I’ve been reading WAY too much Alcatraz, thanks to you.

BTW, I can’t get over the way you spelled “Stupid”.

@linus-smallprint

Ohhh, that hurts!! Ohhh, poor Martha! You can feel her pain! This is one of THE BEST chapters you have ever written, which is kinda funny since you wrote about a girl in this one. You could just really feel her and really relate to her thoughts. Man, it was just so good. Like, super, super good. Cracking job old boy! (lol)

As…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint I’m getting caught up!

Eric, I feel ya about how you’d rather be drawing than be sporty. LOL.

You should give a glossary of Rorian words at the end or something! It might help the jokes stick better. The explanations actually make it funnier than the jokes would be alone, but I still feel like something’s missing. I like it…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Okay! I will try to have a description by tonight.

@linus-smallprint

In some stories, such as the Chronicles of Narnia, it took me a while to figure out that Aslan represented Jesus. In others, Christian allegories and ideas were far harder to spot, such is in The Lord of the Rings, where I didn’t find much until I read the Silmarillion (a sort of prequel). Within your series, I found it very…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Yeah I probably should have specified more. I’m super into fashion so most of my characters dress semi formal and I forget other people don’t do that lol.

@linus-smallprint

*goes in corner and sulks*

comes back out again.

But that’s the WRONG bombshell!!! I meant about Aaron being able to get out and him leaving them all!! Not the wall. The wall affects the fact that no one is coming to rescue them now. If there was anyone coming.
should I still have them trying to escape?

btw, do you think A…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Thank you!! 😊😊

@ellette-giselle

Thank you, and thanks for helping with the historical accuracy (I will definitely need help with that lol)

@linus-smallprint

Okay, agreed, the beginning is not great imo, I will definitely change it, and the formatting. Thanks!

@keilah-h

Okay, that way looks a lot better, and I see what you mean, it is kind of confusing. Thank you!

@keilah-h @linus-smallprint

Okay, next section!!!

Get ready for it…………

With trust in their heavenly Father, Aaron and his companions waited for the dreaded pounding on the door. But by God’s grace, it never came. After a full week of no more nightly orders, the people who remained in the capital felt safe once again.

Then came the w…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle @linus-smallprint @keilah-h @grcr

Thank you guys! It was a lot of fun getting to see all the submissions! 🥰

Don’t worry about it @rae !

Ok! Here’s my comments on each one. I’ll post my drawing below.

Linus-smallprint

You got his facial features pretty well, and I really like how the hat has a bit of droop to it lol. It looks…[Read more]

@theshadow so….we have traded places…..

now you’re telling me to read your story that you’re afraid is a dumpster fire! (Don’t worry, I think yours is great.)

I would go with what @linus-smallprint says about the new paragraphs whenever a character is talking. Look at my fanfic–the google doc separates the paragraphs out a lot, so I’ll…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

im so glad you’re still interested and willing to help me! Once I’m finished with it on here I’ll be passing it on to my editor. So this is SUPER helpful.

hmmm, I think I did foreshadow but maybe not clearly enough. Thats easy to fix.

Aaron has grown!! I’m glad you’re picking up on it! I was worried it was too subtle, b…[Read more]

@keilah-h @linus-smallprint

Okay, I have decided to continue to keep trying with this.

Hope y’all are still interested. lol.

I still plan to have a scene where Aaron talks to Sabina about courtship, but I haven’t been able to work it out yet, so for now we’re just going on.

Another month was drawing to a close, and still no change had been…

[Read more]

@grcr @ellette-giselle @keilah-h

Thank you guys for the submissions! Can’t wait to give my feedback tomorrow! 😁😁

@linus-smallprint

Don’t worry about it, it doesn’t need to be perfect, we’ll have fun seeing it either way!

@freed_and_redeemed

of course you can ask for a character!! You’ll just have to see who all’s in line. 😉

@linus-smallprint

By the way do you remember mentioning that you had a friend who tried to make an account but couldn’t end up getting on here? The same thing happened to me, and after waiting around for two months, I finally conta…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle ooh nice art!

and haha @linus-smallprint Alan and Keefe don’t look much alike, do they? lol

(gets flashbacks of imagining Oliver with a slouch hat despite the fact that you said there was to be NO HATS IN THE LYEN ARMY)

hehe glad you didn’t go full out on me

@linus-smallprint

Most of that was just for fun to get you back for your reaction to the way I imagined Turin

*gasp* How could you!? At least I didn’t imagine Alan with a BEARD and I got his AGE right! That’s what really matters. *sniffs in sophisticated British manner*

I guessed you were joking. lol.

@linus-smallprint

That was so scathing yet grateful that I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. lolololol.

Good grief. You are hard to please.

I was board. That’s what you get.

Maybe if I was actually trying I would do it better.

mid-late 19th-century styles

Good grief! That’s a left fielder.