@linus-smallprint
Active 1 hour, 25 minutes ago- Rank: Eccentric Mentor
- Total Posts: 1089
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 hour, 25 minutes ago
Okay, I will try to get you some answers before too long
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 day, 2 hours ago
Thank YOU for all the help. All of you have been so kind and helpful. Never could have rewritten this without help.
Your welcome! Let me know one you have the feedback questions ready please!
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 day, 2 hours ago
Oh wait, what if he’s describing the painting and he was like, “it was from one of the kingdoms that has knights, obviously not here,” or something like that.
Or does that not work.
Still seems kind of ‘as you know’ish.
Something along those lines. What if he says ‘it was a painting from [_____]. Flavia loved the knight in it an…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 day, 5 hours ago
Rowan shook his head. “No, just any soldier younger than twenty-seven.”
I don’t know too much about war or armies, but I know enough to know that is a bad idea. Especially since it is the younger ones. That’s got to be more than half of his army! Is he trying to be the blood god? Yuck.
Good to see Rowan be saved and some hin…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 day, 6 hours ago
is that actually bad though? I haven’t done it often, and I don’t see much of another way to get that info across. Plus, I’ve used “as you know” sentences before in conversation just to help listeners make quick side connections so they can focus on the main line of thought. Idk.
Well the problem is that it is kind of weird. It…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 days, 4 hours ago
There were from some far-off country— we don’t have knights here.
They, not there.
Also, this is ‘As you know’ dialogue. Leon is telling Julian something he already knows in order to inform the reader.
“And then I put it on. There was a helmet that completely covered my face so that no one could ever recognize me or tell…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 5 days, 6 hours ago
@whalekeeper @stephie @theducktator @ellette-giselle @keilah-h
Chapter 30 out!
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Let's Laugh! Writing Memes in the forum Art 6 days, 4 hours ago
is it bad that I can perfectly read that as “potato” now that I know the context?? lol
Yes. But not because of you. It’s because of our weird language where noses run and feet smell and the inconsistent way we spell things.
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 6 days, 4 hours ago
So they are captured now. Well, it was only a matter of time…
“Lord, help us top trust you,”
To trust.
“I don’t know. I guess I’m a little nervous,” Leon replied. “I don’t know what they’re going to decide, and everything seems so confusing. I was ready to give my life for Christ, yet now it seems that has been thrown aside…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Let's Laugh! Writing Memes in the forum Art 1 week ago
Help! My brain hurts! It cannot accept this!
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week ago
I have to to the American dollar, but now I need to do more math.
Can’t you just use an online USD to CAD converter?
Okay, about $689.23 in Canadian dollars…. if I did that right.
Ah. Thank you.
Oh right. Julian and Leon do just about everything together, so sometimes I forget that they aren’t always meeting the same people. &#x…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week ago
25 gold pieces
That’s a lot of money.
Equivalent in the Canadian dollar please.
Julian should be happy since he was complaining that he wasn’t worth more earlier.
That’s enough to buy a pair of fine horses of a good piece of land.
Okay. That helps.
“The Empire killed my brother, that is why we ran,” Julian added.
I would expect…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 1 day ago
@whalekeeper @stephie @theducktator @ellette-giselle @keilah-h
Chapter 29!
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 1 day ago
I guess I doesn’t really matter anyway. It’s just something that throws me off, but after you get into the story, its clear who you are talking about.
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 1 day ago
still very confused…. Washing soap?
With more soap, of course.
I guess I wasn’t washing the soap directly, but at the store I work at, we sell unpack aged bars of different soaps. Bits of them chip off and it can get really messy, so one in a while we have to clean that and the building dust out of there and reorganize the soap b…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 1 day ago
what?!
Like I said, yesterday was ironic.
Anyways. History lesson.
Aggressive people do not mix with stallions.
Okay, those explanations make sense.
I guess I refer to Daniel’s friends that way because that’s the way I always do in my mind. They are actually refereed to more in that way then by their Babylonian names, It’s just…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 1 day ago
Congratulations on your graduation!
I was gonna give people a chance to catch up
Sorry, it was a busy weekend and yesterday was rather ironic. It was a holiday yesterday, so I had to work for most of it and I spent at least an hour cleaning soap. Who thought that soap needed to be cleaned? Anyway, I’ll get into the feedback…[Read more]
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic The Narrow Path Trilogy – Book II: The Sword in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 5 days ago
@whalekeeper @stephie @theducktator @ellette-giselle @keilah-h
Chapter 28 out!
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 week, 6 days ago
My dad actually hasn’t read these ones yet. It’s more the word “sermon” that’s a knee-jerk reaction and less the actual content. I’m completely behind what I write, it’s just more the idea of “writing a sermon”. If that makes sense…….
Got it.
That depends on the word. In this case, this name is said V-ī-ss. Like vice. In fact, th…
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Linus Smallprint replied to the topic Final book in the The Flames of Hope Saga: The Dawn Will Come in the forum Novel Critique Requests 2 weeks ago
Okay, here’s a question for y’all.
No. You’re fine to keep it in. Instead of feeling like it something I needed to get over for the next part, this felt more like setting the stage for the climax.
(I cringe when y’all say sermon because I’m a woman and I wrote it. But I guess Julian is a guy. 🤣)
Do you ever get your dad to look ov…[Read more]
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