Linus Smallprint

@theducktator

Are you the eldest child? (The reason I ask is that some of Martha’s frustrations come from me being the eldest child, and I am wondering if people who are not eldest children also find her relatable.)

Also, it sounds like you have read everything I have posted so far. I take it you do much to say, but I am curious to know what…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Yes, I am also the eldest sibling.

@theducktator

Thank you for the description! I will get to this if I have time.

@ellette-giselle

yes, this fixes everything.

Good

Considering that I have only scene you talk about younger brothers and that you found Martha relatable, I guess yes, you are the eldest.

@mineralizedwritings

Well, now you’ve learned a little more about describing characters and how that impacts how your reader imagines them!

@stephie

How far are you into the story?

@keilah-h

Ah good. Someone relates to Eric.

You should give a glossary of Rorian words at the end or something! It might help the jokes stick better. The explanations actually make it funnier than the jokes would be alone, but I still feel like something’s missing. I like it though, don’t remove it.…

[Read more]

@theducktator @loopylin @stephie @theshadow @ellette-giselle @keilah-h

I changed my mind. There is one more scene I want to write before The Rebel. Chapter the 17th is now The Role Model.

With this chapter, I have now reached 50,000 words! Whew!

Question for you all. While this series is primarily directed towards believers, I want un…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

*goes back in corner to sulk because not only did the bomb not explode in your face but you picked up the wrong one altogether*

I’m sorry. I have a too-healthy sense of self-preservation to pick up explosive things. I guess I really did go after the fish instead of the shoes. (Next time don’t tell me there is supposed to be a big…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I think something is keeping this plot twist from being effective. As far as I can remember, there has been no talk from any of their characters about fleeing from the land. You’ve already told us that the characters were trapped in the city for over a year. I was under the impression that they had accepted this fate and all…[Read more]

@grcr

Congratulations on your third win!

@mineralizedwritings

Jonathan’s clothing looks more professional than what I picked up from his description. I imagined him dressed casually in a tee-shirt.

@theductator

A request for when you submit your description. When I created this challenge, I intended it to help authors develop their ability to…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Yes, still interested. Keep it coming, and I will keep on trying to find time to give you at least some feedback.

This became a time of deep anxiety, for it was rumored that the governor would not only bring tighter rule, but he would separate the people and send some away to the villages and towns left deserted by the war.

The…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

By the way do you remember mentioning that you had a friend who tried to make an account but couldn’t end up getting on here? The same thing happened to me, and after waiting around for two months, I finally contacted them through Facebook and they figured out that there was a glitch in their system and were able to look at it a…

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@theducktator @freed_and_redeemed

Yes, Ducktator is the only one currently in line. Freedom, you can go next after her.

@mineralizedwritings

Here is my version of Jonathan. He looks younger than I intended. Sorry, it is not coloured, not cleaned up, and some of the lines are a little crude.

@ellette-giselle

That was so scathing yet grateful that I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. lolololol.

Most of that was just for fun to get you back for your reaction to the way I imagined Turin. If I had told you in person, I would have probably been grinning mischievously the whole time, so don’t worry about it.

I was board. That’s what you…

[Read more]

@theshadow

Just read your chapter. I have a couple of things for you.

Firstly, some things about your introduction. I think your intro paragraph to the chapter may be unnecessary. Why? Because soon after, you show us many of these problems in the hushed whispers of the peasants.

Blossom Town’s suffering had only grown worse. The farmers b…

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@ellette-giselle

As my imagination for Turin was off, your illustration of Alan is off. The clothing is wrong. I base my clothing on the mid-late 19th-century styles and add some fantasy elements. This Alan looks like he came out of Lord of the Rings! Alan wears a scarf, not a cape! Also, the hair! This does not look black and feathery! It does…[Read more]

@mineralizedwritings

Just a heads up, the drawing I submit may not be as finished as some of the others I have done. I procrastinated and then got busy with school and work. I will post what I do manage to get done on here tomorrow.

@ellette-giselle

Remember that time I imagined Turin with a beard?