HighScribe

@koshka @esther-c

I gotta work out exactly how Erich got into the US Army tbh😂🫣 I’m thinking it could’ve been a part of the offer for giving him a shorter sentence or something, but I gotta put more research into it

Or he just joined the Army after he had his sentence.

idk exactly yet. 😅 if I have to change things a bit I…

@godlyfantasy12 I’m on nowwwww 🤭

I’d be down to find/create/start a new KP community thing too… 😃😃

only thing is I don’t think I’d be allowed back on Discord because we had a… scary predatory… moment happen on there… so I don’t know… I’d have to ask… 🙂

I’d be open to creating our own community. Slack would probably work for me, I’d have to check with my parents about Discord since I don’t have it yet. There’s also Group Me… which I don’t know much about, but plenty of youth groups seem to use it for announcements (not sure if you can create mini channels or anything like that.)

@godlyfantasy12

I ammmm

but idk for how much longer, lol

@linus-smallprint

😭😢

It’s okay…. I understand.

@ellette-giselle

Got another busy start to this week, so I won’t be able to give you feedback until later. Sorry.

@loopylin @keilah-h
I’ve never used Discord, but I’m open to it!! I wasn’t aware you could have separate channels and such.

Keilah, Slack is mostly used for businesses, but I’ve also been a part of a writing camp that uses it and it works pretty well. The only problem is that if we use the free version, the message history is only 90 days.

@ellette-giselle

Yep! I noticed that! 😆 “Teacher.” I like it.

@hybridlore

Awesome!! I’m so glad you liked it!!!

Yeah….. Rolf had a rough time of it, but he got out sooner, whereas Leon was in the bad situation longer… things just didn’t escalate so high.

btw, was it you who asked about him changing his name? Well, if it was, you now have an answer!

@ellette-giselle

I love the way you put us inside Rolf’s story instead of having him just tell it. It worked so much better. Also, the transitions were great.

Good section. The part about Conrad was sad, though. I don’t really have any big critiques. Great job!

@theshadow

It looks good! I don’t have any major critiques. It is a very short chapter, but it does a good job of building on the tension. Also, I like the way you described the trees.

It seems a little weird that Olivia and Adeline and Dylan don’t seem to care about their families… well, maybe Dylan a little bit.

@freed_and_redeemed

Love it!!

Also was not expecting Erich! I need to know how he joined the American army!!!

@hybridlore  @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @liberty

NEXT SECTION!!!

Interesting POV switch. A new technique I tried out for telling long stories rather then having a ton of first-person dialogue. Let me know what y’all think.

The sixteenth year of Emperor Haidronias’s reign
September 9th
The Empire<…

[Read more]

@theshadow

Oooo!! I like this!! This is getting good!

And, what if, what if we don’t make it?

This is a little cluncky because of the punctuation. If you did: “And what if–– what if we don’t make it?” or “And what if. . . what if we don’t make it?” either of those would work well. Use the dash if you want it to read as a sudden horrif…[Read more]

@keilah-h

@hybridlore

Thanks you two.

As for online, I don’t trust it. I’ve heard and seen too many online things get hacked for my liking. 😅

Thanks for the suggestion though!

Or if we can’t do Slack find another free platform where we can have separate channels/forums to keep everything organized

I’m half-tempted just to create our own Slack community at this point. Since (i think) we all trust each other. And then only people we know can get in (no more stalkers XP).

Because if KP was just abandoned, then we’ve got our own little writing community that will live on

Idk 🤷🏻‍♀️ Just an idea…

@dekreel

Aw, thank you!! That made my day!! 🥹☺️💛

@keilah-h

That one.