@filewriterbase13x
Active 6 years, 7 months ago- Rank: Loyal Sidekick
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Ok, guys. So, the computer tells me that I posted my next part, but I can not see it. Can you guys see it? Did you get tagged?
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
Oh, I am sorry @jenwriter17. I have not been on lately, because I have been super busy. I will give you access as soon as I find out how. 😉
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@supermonkey42, no you weren’t too critical, I asked for honesty and I got it. Thank you so much for that!
Okay, good thanks for helping me with that. 🙂
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@skredder, haha. No I don’t know that reference. At least I don’t think so. It does sound familiar, though. Of course, I included you. You asked me too didn’t you? 🙂
@kaya-young, thank you and you’re welcome. Yes, I suppose it does. 🙂Oh, welcome back @dekreel, oh and she’s gone again. Yes, I would live to add you. I am definitely overstocked on characters, yet. I am glad you have enjoyed them so far.
@ariel-ashira, thank you so much! Yes, B-bot. ☺ B-bot is just something from the world of my imagination. I made him up just to be my personal assistant. And now he is my friend. 😉 Don’t worry you are still in it. I am just trying to figure out the perfect place to put both you and @rochellaine in at the same time. It might be a while though, because of what I have planed.
@alia, of course I can add you. Although, it could be a while. Or not. It all depends.
@sam-kowal. That’s the second time that has been quoted to me, which is funny. It’s funny because when I wrote it I was like, “that sound kinda weird.” I guess it’s a good thing I decided to put it in anyways.
@jenwriter17 No, problem. It’s taking me awhile to put up Part 5 anyways.Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
Agh! I mean @skredder.
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
Oops, @catwing and @skreeder
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
A Kingdom Pen Adventure: Truly Lost our Minds
By
The File Writer of Base13x (@filewriterbase13x)
Part Four: The Losing of Minds
“How? How could I have lost it? It must have been during or after the storm. The storm. Why did I remember that but not who my neighbors were?
I was walking through a forest that I didn’t remember the name of, thinking of all the things I was unable to think about. Suddenly I felt something light fall on my head.
I raised my hand to find a feather in my hair. Then dozens of white feathers came floating down. I looked up see a floating grin continuing to toss them down. The grin got wider and a cat with wings began to appear, perched on a high branch of a large tree. As I was staring at the winged creature, it started to bombard me with little chocolates.
“Hey, what-“I started, but the feline’s voice cut me off.
“Welcome. Welcome to the bestisisest kingdom there is in the world of cyberspace.” said the cat.
“Oh, um. Thank you?” I said, not really sure of what to say.
“Is something wrong?” asked the she-feather-cat.
“No, it’s just that I’ve never been greeted my a cat before.” I said hesitantly.
“A Catwing. Not a cat. A Catwing. There is a very big difference. You can not simply call a Catwing a cat. Just as much as you can call a cat a Catwing. ‘Cause calling a Catwing a cat and a cat a Catwing would be very confusing. Don’t you think? Especially if that cat doesn’t have wings and you call it a Catwing, and the silly creature believes you with all certainty. Then who knows what could happen to the poor beast, I mean cat.” she said almost stubbornly.
“Um…” I was unsure of what to say to this talkative cat- catwing.
She laughed as she glided down to the ground. “I love word jumbles. Don’t you? Anyways, I bid you welcome all the same.
“Thank you. But I don’t think I am new here. As a matter of fact, I believe I’ve been here for quite some time.” I said without taking my eyes off of the mysterious catwing.
“Of course you are new. I’ve never met you. What do mean by, ‘I don’t think’?” she asked.
“Well,” I looked at B-bot, as I usually did when I was not sure how to say something. “I believe. At least, I think that… I think I’ve lost my mind.”
I was expecting the catwing to role over laughing, as if it was some sort of joke, but the creature just stared back at me with concern in her eyes.
“Lost it?” she said. “Oh dear. This is very worrisome indeed.”
She brought a paw up to her chin. “Do you know where you saw it last?”
I pondered the question before answering it. I was pretty certain that I did not know, but I wanted to make extra sure.
“No. I do not remember.” I finally answered.
“Oh dear. I think that this is a job for the king.” the feathered feline said with a concerned look.
“Oh, yes. I remember that we have a king.”
“Do not all kingdoms have kings?” asked B-bot randomly.
“I guess so. But I mean I actually remember. I just can’t remember what the king’s name was.”
Catwing spoke up, “Oh, that’s and easy one.” She smiled. “It’s King… um… er…”
She put a paw to her face and said, “Well, isn’t that funny. Now even I can’t seem to remember his name.” she let out what sounded like a cross between a nervous laugh and an exaggerated meow.
“It doesn’t seem that funny to me.” I was concerned.
B-bot agreed with me. “I do not see anything comical about that statement.”
“Oh dear.” Catwing gasped. “I believe that my mind has disappeared also. I can’t seem to remember much of anything now. I thought that something was off after…”
“The storm?”
“Yes. After the storm. I suppose we both should go to the king now.”
I agreed and we starting out of the woods that we were still in.
“Do you remember where it is? I don’t.” I asked after we had walked for only a few minutes.
“I do. Vaguely.” she said, trying do sound reassuring. I was not reassured.
“Who, or… um… What is that?” asked Catwing suddenly when we had walked yet even farther.
“I believe it’s a giraffe.” I answered after staring at the creature for a while.
“But a purple giraffe? That’s painting?”
We walked up to the giraffe who was painting quite beautifully with a paint prush inbetween her lips.
“Hello.” we said in unison.
“Greetings.” saluted B-bot.
It took a while for the purple giraffe to carefully set down her brush, But she finally said, “Oh, hello! And welcome to the bestisisest place ever! I’m Kaya. I love to hula-hoop and paint. What do you guys like to do?”
Me and Catwing exchanged a look. Oh, no. What was happening?
I was going to try to explain to the friendly giraffe that we had lost our minds and believed that she had too, but before I could say anything I heard someone barking and yelping.
I turned to see a beautiful golden retriever running towards us. When the dog got to us we all yelled in unison, “Welcome.” I bit my cheek immediatly afterward, remembering that this creature was probably not new, I just couldn’t remember who they were.
“We all need to come to the castle Regnis. I just came from there and an emergency meeting has been called.” she said.
“Why what’s wrong?” I asked. What a day!
“Something is terribly wrong everybody seems to have lost their minds.”
“Everybody?”
Starring:
File Writer ( @filewriterbase13x ) and B-bot
Catwing (@catwing )
Kaya ( @kaya-young )
Skreeder ( @skreeder )
Tagging: @rochellaine, @sam-kowal, @supermonkey42, @daeus, @jenwriter17, @that_writer_girl_99, @ariel-ashira, @notawriter, and @livgiordano
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@livgiordano, Okay Great! I can’t wait to have you in my KPA. I might in this next part. If not then the next (part 5). Is it ok if you are from a certain fantasy kingdom that a certain you came up with for a certain story? I just think that that would be awesome if you were a TD. do you know what I am talking about?
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
Yay! @supermonkey42 Thank you for critiquing this for me. It will be super helpful when I write my third draft. Too detailed? I was thinking it was not detailed enough. But I think I know what you mean. The thing is that we jump into the action at like chapter 3. So, I guess I could try to even it out between 2 and three a little more. I think that the thing is that I did not originally have a prologue. So I ended up making chapter 1 kind of like my prologue accidentally. I think what you are saying is kind of like put a little less info dumps. Yes, I definitely get that. Okay, so let me get this down. You like him? Like you think he’s a fun character or a fun guy because, well… Oh ok good. About the emotion I mean. Although I think I need to figure out how to describe emotion a little better. Hmm. I don’t really know how to make it more complex in this part. I was trying to make her sadness ALL about him going, because if that would happen to be then I would not be able to think about anything else. Of course, when you continue reading, a lot more happens and you find out a little more about her emotion. Yeah, the prologue has a lot of intriguing stuff I think, although… The rest is from Madelyn’s POV mostly. So if you liked Frederick but not Madelyn then you probably would not enjoy it so much. You know what I mean right? Yes, The mystery. More mystery? Well, it’s not supposed to be a mystery as much as a suspense adventure. Although the mystery does get more complex, I don’t know of any parts that are super mysterious, sadly. I am glad you think it’s a good start. There is a lot more to the plot and all that stuff, but I think this little critique will help me as I keep writing. So, info more spread out, work on emotion, and work on description. That last one was from another critique. Ah, why do I love that word?
Oh, and thank you for putting part three on the compendium so quickly. If you see a place where I am missing a word or misspell something, you can feel free to correct it as long as you (please) tell me about it. Because I sometimes realize some typos right after I post it. But if they aren’t a bother you can of course not worry about them, just letting you know that in case you thought that they were very annoying and wished you could just correct it but didn’t think you could. Okay, okay I’m done.
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@livgiordano, of course. Aw, thanks. Um, one question. Can you have like actually Rapunzel length hair? Or do you want it to be your true length? Do you want me to write you as yourself, write you as your self with additional quirks, or add something in particular to your character.
@skredder, Haha, don’t worry. I am sure my mind is somewhere. I am glad you think it’s getting better.
@jenwriter17, Sorry B-bot scared you. 🙂 I am sure that he would feel bad about that. You know if he remembered who you were.
@supermonkey42, Yes. I guess you could say that, but keep this in mind: Truly lost our minds. Mwahahaha…
@rochellaine, Oh, yay. I am glad you think so.
@notawriter, So do I. 🙂 😉
@catwing, Of course I did. That’s why I’m on my way to the Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Come on Toto…er… I mean B-bot.Yes, I got it. Ah, classics.
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@ariel-ashira. I loved her poem too! Thanks for answering those questions. I have noticed that I need a lot more description in my writing. Agh I really need to work on that. It is good to have a second opinion. Thank you!
Yes, @livgiordano does really good poetry. She did an awesome poem for a story we are coauthoring. It was more like a story, but just as awesome! I hope you don’t mind me saying that Liv.
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
Oh, @ariel-ashira, sorry I didn’t answer your question. It is in the future. I imagine it in the late 2000s or maybe even later, but I don’t really have a set date.
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@ariel-ashira, thanks! I don’t want to be a pest, but can you answer any of my questions?
Hmm, what do you think @livgiordano ? Do we know each other? Just kidding, yes we do. Quite well actually. At least I think so. Liv is one of my best friends in the world. She’s pretty awesome. *high fives*
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)
@livgiordano. Aw, that’s nice of you to say. Yeah, I would have tagged you too, but you have already read this part and know like the whole plot already. 😁
Currently writing the Hostanica Files with the assistance of B-bot, my PAIA (Personal AI Assistant.)