The Adonial Saga

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  • #165044
    Cloaked Mystery
    @jonas
      • Rank: Chosen One
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      This is my main WIP, an epic fantasy trilogy (at least that’s the plan) set on one of the planets in Celestiar, Adonial. “The Adonial Saga” is just the working name.

      Anyway, I don’t have any of this written yet, except for some old drafts. I created this forum so that you can help force me to make progress. It might be a while before I actually start posting chapters for critiques, but I have a lot of things I could use feedback and help on, such as worldbuilding and plot.

      I might not have much to share at first, but to make sure I don’t neglect to do this, feel free to ask about my progress every week or so.

      So…yeah… I can’t think of anything to share right now, but I wanted to create this now so that I wouldn’t forget later.

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      @highscribeofaetherium
      @thearcaneaxiom @savannah_grace2009 @rae @anyone else

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      #165046
      Cloaked Mystery
      @jonas
        • Rank: Chosen One
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        If anyone wants a link to the google doc that has my basic summary (although some of it is outdated), let me know, and I can share it with you in a status update.

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        #165049
        RAE
        @rae
          • Rank: Chosen One
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          You have one subscriber

          "You need French Toast."
          #AnduthForever (hopefully 💕)

          #165052
          -GRCR-
          @grcr
            • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
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            @jonas

            *presses subscribe*

            INTP.

            #165053
            HighScribe
            @highscribeofaetherium
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              @jonas

              GET TO WORK, BUDDY!!!!! XD

              A disturbingly short time ago, in a land uncomfortably close by...

              #165054
              Cloaked Mystery
              @jonas
                • Rank: Chosen One
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                @highscribeofaetherium

                Thanks, that’s very helpful. *Sarcasm*

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                #165055
                HighScribe
                @highscribeofaetherium
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                  @jonas

                  You’re very welcome. I am a very helpful person.

                  *ignores sarcasm*

                  XD

                  A disturbingly short time ago, in a land uncomfortably close by...

                  #165066
                  Sara
                  @savannah_grace2009
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                    @jonas

                    JONAS GO WRITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR ELSE WYOH WILL HAUNT YOU!!!!!! fOrEvEr!!!

                    does that help?

                    • This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by Sara.

                    Lukas&Livia
                    #Lalbert
                    Sef&Chase
                    #HOTTOLINE
                    LEFSE FOREVER!!!!!! <333

                    #165072
                    Cloaked Mystery
                    @jonas
                      • Rank: Chosen One
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                      @savannah_grace2009

                      That’s a weird threat.

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                      #165079
                      Sara
                      @savannah_grace2009
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                        @jonas

                        WHAT? It’s actually very serious!!! Now you just offended Wyoh. She’s coming for you…….

                        Lukas&Livia
                        #Lalbert
                        Sef&Chase
                        #HOTTOLINE
                        LEFSE FOREVER!!!!!! <333

                        #165169
                        Cloaked Mystery
                        @jonas
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                          @everyone

                          Okay, here’s a question I can ask (although if you haven’t seen my overview yet, you won’t have any context for this. I’m working on a new overview, so that should hopefully be done soon):

                          So, my current plan is to have it be three books, each with a different focus character. Book one’s focus character would be Ellis, book two’s Grayton, and book three’s Kate.

                          However, I have been reconsidering using Grayton as a focus character. There are several reasons I don’t really want to:

                          • While he is an emotionally intense and interesting character, to a large extent, he isn’t aware of his own true feelings and motives, which means that we won’t understand him much better from inside his head than outside.
                          • From the beginning of the story, he will be with Ellis, so he’ll get a lot of “screen”time regardless of whether he is a focus character or not.

                          There is one reason he might be a good focus character: he will probably appear annoying and antagonistic from other characters’ perspective, so if I want the reader to sympathize with him, we have to go into his head sometimes. I can do that without making him a focus character though.

                          So my question is really two questions: should I replace him as a focus character? And if so, who should I replace him with?

                          I have a few cantidates. (Note: my long-term plan is to have three main trilogies set on Adonial, and to have each of the nine orders of Eivir represented by a focus character in a book. Example: Ellis represents the line of Percaro, Kate represents the line of Atmor. So the third focus character of the series will definitely be one of the Eivir.)

                          Selius Secrivis: he will be a somewhat important character already, so I would just have to expand his role.

                          Denemar Eidershon: he is a very important character already, but maybe not the most interesting POV, at least not as he is developed so far.

                          And…I guess those are the main two. The other Eivir would be Everent Eojold, Douglas Kaulo, Eldiar Paligen, and Richard Thulac, but none of them are currently planned to be major characters.

                          This was a very rambling post, but hopefully it’s clear enough. Possibly none of you know enough to be able to answer, but as I said, I’m working on a new overview.

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                          #165321
                          RAE
                          @rae
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                            @jonas

                            I’m going to take a wild chance and give you advice when I have no context…

                            Unless you think you can pull Grayton off in an interesting way, that makes readers want to read about him, don’t make him the MC. I doubt that helps any.

                            "You need French Toast."
                            #AnduthForever (hopefully 💕)

                            #165323
                            Cloaked Mystery
                            @jonas
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                              @rae

                              Yeah, that’s helpful. I think partially what I could use help figuring out is if he there is someone more interesting.

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                              #165629
                              TheArcaneAxiom
                              @thearcaneaxiom
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                                @jonas

                                Sorry, I’ve been inactive all week.

                                Personally, I think that a character that won’t be well understood inside or outside may still be an interesting main character to see the prospective of. Despite not being able to understand the character’s motives, as the character doesn’t understand them himself, that can still be a relatable quality, and a unique pov, because you can use it to generate continuous intrigue throughout the whole story. It will also give a potential arc for him to progress in, trying to discover himself, how he feels and what he wants.

                                Ultimately, I think any prospective is worth telling however, so maybe I’m simply biased by that, but I don’t know.

                                He is perfect in Justice, yet He is perfect in Mercy, even when we fail Him. For this, He is good.

                                #165630
                                Cloaked Mystery
                                @jonas
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                                  @thearcaneaxiom

                                  Okay, thanks for the advice!

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