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I am on Wattpad. But I do realize that it’s not the best of sites for a Christian so I jumped at the chance when I learned of Kingdom Pen.
As for my purpose in life, the easy answer would be to live for Christ. But I find myself asking what that exactly means at times. As far as I know, I’m destined for great things as God has spared my life despite all the dumb things I’ve done, heh.. heh..
@jess_penroseLife's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.
What’s the point of the game? @xonos-darkgrate
Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.
@xonos-darkgrate Ah, right. Well, you’ve probably gathered that they are nothing alike, but another site that is a bit better than Wattpad is Sweek? It isn’t Christian, but is not as, well, dodgy as Wattpad. I’m on both as J.A.Penrose. So, if you need a Christian around, I’m there.
*Nods* A good answer. But is living for Christ what he desired? I mean, Peter was clearly for Christ when he cut off a soldier’s ear, but didn’t Jesus rebuke him? What do you think it means when you say ‘live for Christ’? (Do not take any form of offence; this is all being written with 100% belief that you are a Christian, I’m more giving a few things to think about. *fingerguns*)
Writer | Freelance Editor
Inspiration<@that_writer_girl_99, the game is closely tied to the Bible story in general. Using their own characters as in stories from the Bible. Think Pilgrim’s Progress with a steampunk makeover.
Oh, most definitely. You could possibly say that the reason we EXIST is because we were meant to live for Christ. Sure, Peter did that “for Christ”, but that didn’t mean that he lived correctly? I’m not sure how to put it, but Peter took things into his own hands. Not letting God’s plan unfold.
And when I said “live for Christ”. I meant exactly that. I live because Christ had the grace to let me. I’ve chosen to follow him as a Christian and that’s what I will and already do. But if you were asking what I do as a Christian, I go to church every Sunday, read my Bible every night, and believe that Jesus Christ came as both God and man to die for our sins. And of course the biggest part, that he rose on the third day afterwards.
I hope this answers your questions. @jess-penrose
Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.
@xonos-darkgrate so, des that in your mind mean that God loves us one on one? Does that mean that He is a kind ruler? Or does that mean He is our friend and constant companion?
*Nods* However, that answer was good, I will stop my probing for a while now.
Writer | Freelance Editor
Inspiration<@xonos-darkgrate Oh sorry, yup, that’s basically what I meant. Are you male or female. 😛 So you’re the first INTJ/Architect (dominantly at least) guy on this forum as far as I know. That’s real cool.
Aha, gotcha.
@xonos-darkgrate I really, really like the excerpt you posted. The voice is very strong. The one criticism I have is that the summary of his early life never really clearly transitioned into the present. He was looking back, and I never quite caught where he stopped and began living the current story.
And I’m already curious about Brandon. 😉@xonos-darkgrate I agree, that was really well done. Very good at drawing the reader in, too. And I love the beginning quote by the Jake of Jacks guy.
I have a few things to point out, but they’re mostly just structural/punctuation stuff. The first paragraph, after it says The City of Cards, is mixing past and present tense. I can see how it might have been done on purpose, but I’m still not sure if it’s supposed to be that way or not.
In the part The would claw , the=they
In I never knew her name, when I read the inscription the comma should rather be a semi-colon.
Same with this one— my name wrong, for some reason
And this Down the gutter, ironically, I now sleep in a gutter. Should probably be Down the gutter. Ironically, I now sleep in a gutter.
With this, I asked her what, she told me in a low voice there should probably be an ‘and’ after the comma.
With this sentence and several others—likely a couple of those I said should have semi-colons instead of commas— Dad soon pawned off all the artifacts so he could afford more booze, he was sad too. —I think semi-colons would be better in those cases as a general rule. There’s a place for commas there instead, as it gives that particular feel to the Point of View, even though it’s not really grammatically correct. But it was used quite a bit throughout the whole thing—commas instead of semi-colons or instead of just periods and then a new sentence—so it should probably be changed up more. If it’s that way that much, it starts to feel more like it’s just structurally incorrect.
And the statement that he doesn’t have any family that he knows of isn’t techincally correct, because he knows his sister is still alive. Even though he doesn’t have any family living with him.
Other than those though, I don’t really have anything else to say! Just that it was well written and intriguing. *thumbs up*
@xonos-darkgrate Yep, the narrative voice is sweet.
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Hey guys, just got my some more time here. So I guess I’ll just reply to you guys one by one.
@jess-penrose, my answer to your question (God loves us one on one? Does that mean that He is a kind ruler? Or does that mean He is our friend and constant companion?)is this:Why not BOTH? God is all and omnipotent and we can not possibly hope to understand all His ways, but my most basic answer would be to believe that he is God and good. Best not to question how it works lest you go insane? Heh, heh… jk.
In regards to @kate-flournoy, okay then. I’ll look into that and see if I can edit it to make it a better in that part. Thanks!
@emma-flournoy,
Whoah! Thanks for pointing all those out! I’m not the best grammatical student in the world and I often tend to substitute commas for everything else when I get overly excited in writing a story. I’ll try to fix those. Again, thanks for telling me! And also the story holes, those need to be fixed too! Ha.. thanks!
@daeus, thanks for thinking so!Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.
@xonos-darkgrate *flys in through window* Hello and welcome. I am Catwing, Abassador of the catwings of Allore (a kingdom in my book).
If you are feeling alone, I can not (and do not wish to) read any of the Harry Potter books (or movies). *starts humming* I will read your except later. But I am trying to write… *nervous laughter* edit.IMMA KAPEEFER! Til we're old and gray!
@catwing, Salutations, Catwing. Incidentally (my favorite word), I’m allergic to cats… so I suppose I won’t be visiting Allore for fear of sneezing its very foundations down. Ha…
@jess-penrose, I am glad to see my answers satisfy you. I’ll check out your link now..Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.
@xonos-darkgrate Heh, you’re welcome! By some sort of blessing or curse, I can’t help noticing all the punctuation-ish things, so it wasn’t a problem. 🙂 The comma is slightly mis/overused sometimes, but I totally understand how easy it is to just go with it when you’re on a roll. Best wishes for the rest of the book!
@xonos-darkgrate It isn’t filled with catwings. We live there with Griffins, mermaids, jackelopes, humans, and other things.
*throws choclate since you are probably allergic to feathers too.* *adds chocolate notes to Catwing handbook*IMMA KAPEEFER! Til we're old and gray!
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