Novel Excerpt (Feedback Welcome)

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  • #30933
    Elizabeth
    @that_writer_girl_99
      • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
      • Total Posts: 1819

      In fact… you could make him the one with the complete thematic truth. That it’s better to face reality than shelter in ignorance. A very unlikely bearer of truth— maybe the reader doesn’t see it at first. But if you give him that, his EiL should be the one that wins.

      Agreed. @kate-flournoy

      Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.

      #30935
      Kate Flournoy
      @kate-flournoy
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 3976

        @That_Writer_Girl_99 *gulp* Um… yes. Apparently I did. I’m sorry… it slips out when I get excited around people I like. 😉

        It doesn’t have to be a physical difference at all. The difference you pointed out is perfect. Thing is, you have to realize the way people act is directly tied to their EiLs. Tam and Kara differ there, and that is the important part, because it will affect the way they act and move the plot. 😉

        Yes. @Daeus does have a thing for good villains. As do I. They can be so powerful.

        And… I wanted to run over the five basic points of story structure with you and what that has to do with theme, but I hafta run. Catch you tomorrow?

        Elizabeth
        @that_writer_girl_99
          • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
          • Total Posts: 1819

          Yep! I have work from morning ’til early afternoon, but feel free to drop your response at your convenience. 🙂 @kate-flournoy

          Cya!

          Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.

          #30948
          Anonymous
            • Rank: Wise Jester
            • Total Posts: 77

            @that_writer_girl_99
            Hi!
            I love your story and think it has lots of potential!! <3 I’m not quite sure what else has been said, but here’s my two cents:
            ~The prologue was a bit of an info dump. Even though hearing the character voice was interesting, by about halfway I was skimming. (I stopped skimming as soon as reaching chap. 1, though, that was fantastic!) I’d suggest skipping the prologue altogether and weaving the details in through the first couple chapters.
            ~Seriously?! I read one chapter and I already love the characters?! That takes some mad skills. *sends cookies* Really, I love the way you managed to portray Kara and Tam in so short a time. Beautiful.
            ~THEIR POWERS CAN BE EXPLAINED BY SCIENCE?! Awesome! I can’t wait to hear that.
            ~the character voice, I love it.
            ~and my favorite part: she doesn’t want to leave?! that is a beautiful twist. At least, that’s what I got from the story, am I wrong? But it kinda seemed like she was okay where she was. Maybe scared of going out…

            I glance at a couple theories and other things you mentioned… all look wonderful! Good luck and I hope to read the whole novel one day! <3

            #30976
            Kate Flournoy
            @kate-flournoy
              • Rank: Chosen One
              • Total Posts: 3976

              @That_Writer_Girl_99 okay so first of all, I read through the posts that I did last night and realized my brain must have been working on a low battery because they were very scattered, so thank you for sticking with me. 😛

              How much do you know about character arcs?

              And while I wait for you to answer that question, we can have a little talk about story structure and what that has to do with the MCs arc, as I mentioned before.

              Actually you know what… I’m just going to copy some of the notes I took from the theme course. No credit to myself. *glances around at forum moderators* @Daeus I assume that’s… legal? 😛

              Five Key Basic Scenes of a Character Arc and their relationship to plot:
              1. Characteristic moment (Inciting Incident. Protagonist’s world is unbalanced, and he seeks to restore that balance.)
              2. First Plot Point— protagonist commits to following his story goal. (Which is driven by his/her EiL.)
              3. Midpoint (Second Plot Point— turning point. Protagonist has revelation, begins acting instead of reacting.)
              4. Third Plot Point— protagonist hits his low point; in essence being punished for seeking the truth and wondering if it’s worth it after all. Darkest moment. Sets up questions for the climax.
              (Climax— thematic development comes to a head).
              5. Resolution (The protagonist receives the reward for his actions.)

              See how the protagonist’s arc affects the plot? That’s the foundation for a truly good story.

              Daeus
              @daeus
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 4238

                @kate-flournoy Yes, it’s legal. Ideas aren’t copyrighted, only the organization of those ideas. So if you were to create your own course basically copying everything we say, that would be a copyright violation, but pretty much anything less than that is totally fine.

                It’s actually good promotion for us. 😛

                Some day I’m going to release you on times square and see how many courses we sell. 😀

                🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

                #30986
                Elizabeth
                @that_writer_girl_99
                  • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                  • Total Posts: 1819

                  @kate-flournoy Haha, funny you mention this, I just finished the lesson on this in the Jumpstart Your Novel course @daeus did. What you were saying last night makes much more sense now.

                  Um…character arcs. I know what they are, but I couldn’t tell you how to actually write one…It isn’t something that I think about actively. Er, something I’m not used to thinking about actively, that is.

                  Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.

                  #31003
                  Elizabeth
                  @that_writer_girl_99
                    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                    • Total Posts: 1819

                    @aysia-serene Hello, it’s nice to meet you!

                    Haha, yeah. I’ve cleaned up the prologue a bit–shortened it to give me a bit of breathing room. Would’t want to give away all the important details right of the bat, I suppose…

                    Anyways, thanks for the kind words!

                    Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.

                    #31008
                    Kate Flournoy
                    @kate-flournoy
                      • Rank: Chosen One
                      • Total Posts: 3976

                      @Daeus DO IT. I may hate salespeople and be horrified of selling things myself but for this… I’d do it.


                      @That_Writer_Girl_99
                      I’ll explain character arcs this evening. For now I have to run. 😉

                      Elizabeth
                      @that_writer_girl_99
                        • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                        • Total Posts: 1819

                        Alright. @kate-flournoy

                        Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.

                        #31010
                        Snapper
                        @dragon-snapper
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 3515

                          @kate-flournoy Sometimes, I think that you should write a book on writing books.

                          ☀ ☀ ☀ ENFP ☀ ☀ ☀

                          #31013
                          Anonymous
                            • Rank: Wise Jester
                            • Total Posts: 77

                            @that_writer_girl_99
                            Okay cool! No problem 😉

                            #31015
                            Kate Flournoy
                            @kate-flournoy
                              • Rank: Chosen One
                              • Total Posts: 3976

                              @Dragon-Snapper *freaks out* I wouldn’t know where to start! 😛 Besides… writing a book about it isn’t the same as helping individual people through it. And recently I discovered something about myself— I really like coaching people. Like, really like it. I like watching them grow and seeing things click and then stepping back and watching them start off on their own all crazy to learn more… it’s extremely rewarding. 😀

                              All right @That_Writer_Girl_99. Character arcs are pretty simple. A character arc is the change any given character makes over the course of a story. Basically, the shift in their EiL as their views grow and are challenged and need to be reshaped. There are four basic kinds of arc. I’m going to copy and paste a brainstorming session I did a while back.


                              .Positive Change Arc #1:

                              Begins with a Passive Lie. Straight line from Lie to Truth, pushed on by pain in the plot resulting from Lie-informed decisions. A reaction arc— character changes worldview as physical circumstances demand and illustrate wrong perspective. Ends in rejection of the Lie in favor of the Truth.

                              .Positive Change Arc #2 (Or Transformation Arc)
                              Begins with an Aggressive Lie caused by wrong reaction to an Ugly Truth. Aggressive Lie drives character to take action against said Ugly Truth, but because it is a Lie, actions are warped and do not provide solution. In search for the solution, the character must eventually confront his Lie and overcome it, where he emerges with a full understanding of the Truth.

                              .Negative Change Arc #1
                              Begins with a Passive Truth; straight line from Truth to Lie, pushed on by pain in the plot and the character’s inability to deal with Ugly Truths. A reaction arc— character changes worldview as perception of physical circumstances demands, and ultimately falls because of inability to handle Ugly Truth, and/or temptation of Beautiful Lies.

                              .Negative Change Arc #2 (Or Corruption Arc)

                              Begins with Aggressive Truth caused by unchallenged right understanding of the nature of Truth, pushed on by pain/failure in the plot to question Truth, and ultimately rejects it because of inability to handle/explain Ugly Truth, and/or resist temptation of Beautiful Lies.

                              Also there is a flat arc, which is where the character doesn’t change himself, but instead changes the world around him.

                              I actually have pages and pages of this stuff I’m still working on because I think it’s fascinating and it can get a lot more complicated than what I just gave you, but that’s the necessary foundation. 🙂

                              And… I have to ask. Does the 99 at the end of your tag stand for 1999? If so what month? I was born March 24th, 1999. 😉

                              Snapper
                              @dragon-snapper
                                • Rank: Chosen One
                                • Total Posts: 3515

                                @kate-flournoy Well, you’re very knowledgeable on the subject. *uses the force* she is the Chosen One… Seriously, though. You are great at explaining things!

                                ☀ ☀ ☀ ENFP ☀ ☀ ☀

                                #31021
                                Kate Flournoy
                                @kate-flournoy
                                  • Rank: Chosen One
                                  • Total Posts: 3976

                                  @Dragon-Snapper considering the history of the Chosen One up to this point I’m not sure I like that idea… XD But thank you for the compliment. 😉

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