my star wars Fanfic

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  • #173557
    Evelyn collins
    @evelyn-collins
      • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
      • Total Posts: 118

      WEEEEEEEEE, heheheheh, I have 0% idea what I’m doing, sorry if this is wrong, but here is what I currently have for my Starwars FaNfIc!! enjoy, and no feedback is unwelcome!!

      https://docs.google.com/document/d/1r2c47zumnP-UYjhqi7QpAeXYheAWF1fWh5issgWDXwQ/edit?usp=sharing

      tada!!!!!!

      "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

      #173559
      Loopy
      @loopylin
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 2441

        @evelyn-collins

        You’re not doing anything wrong, lol

        I will summon some star wars nerds for you hehe


        @keilah-h
        @theloonyone

        “Nothing says autumn like slurpin’ apples.” -my uncle

        #173561
        Evelyn collins
        @evelyn-collins
          • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
          • Total Posts: 118

          @loopylin thanks!!

          "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

          #173562
          Loopy
          @loopylin
            • Rank: Chosen One
            • Total Posts: 2441

            @evelyn-collins

            Oh, I like it so far! Poor Leo. Is she the main character? (Also, I didn’t realize that could be a girl’s name?)

            “Nothing says autumn like slurpin’ apples.” -my uncle

            #173563
            Evelyn collins
            @evelyn-collins
              • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
              • Total Posts: 118

              @loopylin thanks again! yeas, it can be a girl’s name since the 90s apparently

              "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

              #173568
              Loopy
              @loopylin
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 2441

                @evelyn-collins Cool! I have a boy character named Lois and a girl character named Eddie so I kinda enjoy names like that

                “Nothing says autumn like slurpin’ apples.” -my uncle

                #173570
                Evelyn collins
                @evelyn-collins
                  • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                  • Total Posts: 118

                  @loopylin Same 🙂

                  "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

                  #173599
                  TheLoonyOne
                  @theloonyone
                    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                    • Total Posts: 446

                    @evelyn-collins @loopylin @keilah-h

                    i have been summoned

                    😏

                    (It’s been so long since I’ve been on KP)

                    Aaanywaay… I see a star wars fanfic!!!

                    I’ll get you your feedback 👍

                    #173607
                    Evelyn collins
                    @evelyn-collins
                      • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                      • Total Posts: 118

                      @theloonyone thx!!!

                      "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

                      #173632
                      Keilah H.
                      @keilah-h
                        • Rank: Chosen One
                        • Total Posts: 5035

                        @evelyn-collins I love it so far!!

                        Ugh, Rampart though! I hate him so much lol.

                        and Crosshair???? You included him in this???? All right, I love it even more now.

                        If you stalk any of the roleplays you’ll find I’ve included him as a roleplay character in two or three of them, because he’s that awesome.

                        Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                        #173633
                        Keilah H.
                        @keilah-h
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 5035

                          Once with the rest of his squad–except them as I assume they were like as children–and twice with the charrie-which-will-likely-be-his-wife-at-the-end-of-the-fanfic (which sounds a little strange when you say it like that though)

                           

                           

                           

                          she’s like the exact opposite of him though, which opens up the possibility of comedy, but since “comedy” and “Crosshair” don’t really fit well in the same sentence, I have a feeling the funny bits will be minimal.

                          Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                          #173909
                          Keilah H.
                          @keilah-h
                            • Rank: Chosen One
                            • Total Posts: 5035

                            @evelyn-collins ok so idea for you, since you said you haven’t fully figured out everything between Leo and Crosshair.

                            I was thinking quite a bit about Leo’s circumstances before Varian showed up, and tbh, the actions of Leo’s mother and the fact that she doesn’t seem to know her dad (otherwise she might have thought he looked familiar? Cross’s armor doesnt change that much between republic and imperial) led to one of two logical but equally unpalatable conclusions: Either Cross totally dumped his wife, or Leo is illegitimate. The first idea, I think the rest of the batch would have noticed him hanging around with a girlfriend, and the second conclusion is 1) a bit dark 2) really doesn’t sound like something Crosshair would do.

                             

                            So I came up with a theory: What if Leo were genetically created? Like, someone down the line decided to take Cross’s DNA and make another super-sniper (or maybe they did it to the whole Bad Batch and the other kids are somewhere), but either the project failed or the Republic/Empire shut it down, and they left Leo with her biological mom. That could by why her mom doesn’t care for her–because she wasn’t much more than a genetic donor.

                             

                            Please don’t be offended by anything I said. It’s just theories and it’s your story, and also please correct me if I got any of your story points wrong.

                             

                            Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                            #173917
                            Evelyn collins
                            @evelyn-collins
                              • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                              • Total Posts: 118

                              @keilah-h hey! so, Believe it or not, I have actually considered most of those ideas before (not the second one bc idk if I could deal with that) , and I like them all, but I am wildly indecisive, so I’ve just been saying the pros and cons for like 2 weeks.

                              I am not offended!! I actually like it when other people have ideas to help, especially when I’m in a rut like rn 🙂

                              "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

                              #173918
                              Keilah H.
                              @keilah-h
                                • Rank: Chosen One
                                • Total Posts: 5035

                                @evelyn-collins yeah I couldn’t deal with that idea either, so I was making sure we were on the same page in that regard lol

                                Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                                #173920
                                Evelyn collins
                                @evelyn-collins
                                  • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                                  • Total Posts: 118

                                  @keilah-h lol

                                  "Fives, no!" "Fives, YeS!"

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