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@freedomwriter76
Lol did you mean to post those new characters? I don’t see anything XD
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
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@mineralizedwritings I will…but I realized that they, ahem, *cough cough* need a lot of work *cough cough*
just now that I WILL try to share them…and they’re 7 brothers, so I think they’ll be fun 😉
@freedomwriter76
Wow.
I love underground church stories, and that was with your beloved characters! A little quick of a turning, but still,
Wow.
I like this Peter. Thank you for sharing!
You have listened to fears, child. Come, let me breathe on you... Are you brave again? -Aslan
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UGHHHH, IT WON’T POST!!!!!! 😭😭
@euodia-vision lol yep that’s my family!
@freedomwriter76 love that scene!! ooh and I like the board.
TBH I’m wondering if I should join your little protection squad, lol.
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
I saw you guys talking about it in the art group.
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
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@keilah-h Awww, tysm!!! 💖💖
ohh, yes, you can 100% join the #BuckyProtectionSquad😎😘
poor boi needs our protection 😭😭
XXD
@koshka I read that book!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
@freedomwriter76
I read both chapters you posted…😢 😭 I love them!🥹
"Would you kindly...?"
@esther-c @mineralizedwritings @freedomwriter76 @everyone!!
I wrote some more for my WIP! I would love your guys’s feedback on it!
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The sun moved higher and higher up in the sky, while the scenery stayed the same.
Hugo was in the lead, I was in the middle and Sam held up the back.
“I wish we had a machete.” Hugo sighed, brushing aside a bush of thorns.
“Me too,” Sam agreed. “Then we could fight off all the monkeys that live in the jungle.”
“Monkeys?” I asked, curiously. It was funny to hear the strange stories the boys came up with.
“Sure!” He said eagerly. “You know the ones that swing through the trees with their tails? They are said to live in swamps by big cities. And they love to scare children,”
I smiled but let him continue.
“They are very loud and their screams…” Sam shuddered. “Can frighten the bravest people.”
“Sounds scary.” I commented, gently brushing aside rotten leaves that were floating on the surface. The last thing I wanted was to run into an alligator.Hugo muffled a laugh in his arm and Sam began to continue. But something out of the ordinary caught my eye.
‘Hold on,” I hissed, stopping in my tracks. Both boys also stopped and turned towards me. “Look.” I pointed to the trees above.
“Monkeys?” Sam asked.
The trees were all broken, knocked over and bent, as if a construction project was left unfinished.
“What did this?” Hugo asked, walking toward the trees to feel the splintered wood. “Red paint?”
“On the tree?” I asked, stepping forward. He was correct. Red paint was covering the splintered parts of the tree. I picked at a piece with my fingernail. It wasn’t just paint. It was painted metal.
Sam came over and examined the trail there was. “Look there’s something big over there!” He exclaimed, running as fast as he could in the muddy water. Hugo and I ran after him, being careful not to slip on the rotten leaves that lined the bottom.
“Woah!” Sam yelled. “A downed plane!” But Sam’s voice wasn’t the only voice that rang out in the silence.
“Hello? Don’t leave me! I’m up here!” A girl was standing on top of the plane, waving her arms wildly.
Sam just stared at her, mouth agape. She looked down at me and waved. “Hi! I’m Vikii! What are you guys doing here?”
She skillfully slid down the side of the plane, as if she had been practicing for a long time.
As she came closer I could see bloodstains covering her yellow shirt, arms and face. Her long black hair was tangled and knotted. She had painted butterflies all over her black jeans which gave her a more happy appearance, as her face had the permanent scar of anger and sadness. Her bronze skin was scratched and bleeding but she looked happy. Very happy for a person stuck in a swamp.
“What happened to you?” Sam asked in an awed tone. Not realizing how rude the question sounded.
Instead of being angry, the girl, Vikii smiled. “A lot. So much that you might not believe me.”
“Don’t worry, we will believe you.” Hugo said, staring wide-eyed at the plane.
“Great!” She took a few more steps towards us. “Before I explain, what are you guys doing here? City kids in the middle of a swamp?”
Sam looked miffed “We are searching for our parents and friends who were kidnapped by C.H.I.M.E and taken to Bermill.”
“Really? We- me and my uncle were on our way to Bermill also. The survivors continued there, but I stayed put. No idea what happened or where I am. They didn’t know either. I tried to make them stay here at the wreck. There was food and water and protection, but nooo, they wanted to go to Bermill. I did too, since my aunt lives there but the safest place is definitely here. Are you guys lost? Do you have a phone? I would love to call my aunt, but nothing works.”
“Umm, Vikii?” I said carefully. “An EMP happened. The power is out… well… forever.”
Vikii reeled back in shock. “Forever? The power?”
We all nodded.
She sat down smack in the filthy water. Not even seeming to care about her clothes.
“When did it go out?”
I scrunched my eyes. How long had it been? “Three days ago.” I said firmly.
“That’s when we crashed.” She whispered. “Stupid power. Stupid plane.” Without another word, she jumped up as quickly as she sat down and ran over to the plane. She shimmied through a big split on the side and we could hear her moving heavy things, but stood outside unsure what to do.
In a few minutes she emerged, backpack on back and hair tied up in a ponytail.
“I’m coming too.”
Hugo and Sam exchanged looks of confusion. I however was on board with having another girl come along.
Vikii saw Hugo and Sams faces and turned to face me.
“That is of course, if you don’t mind,” She said softly, “I can stay here.”
“No no, of course you’re welcome!” I said, ignoring the boys. “It will be nice to have you help us.”
She grinned. “I guess we better get going then right? We have a long way to go,” she turned to face the boys, “and don’t you let me mess up your stupid time scampering around the woods.” She changed her tone when she spoke to me. “I’m sorry, but there is hardly any supplies left. The people took most of it when they left, I used a ton and packed the remaining stuff.”
“Don’t worry.” I said, trying to sound comforting although the thought of running out of supplies was already in my mind. “We will have enough.”
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"Would you kindly...?"
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@acancello love it!! making me curious about this girl…🤔
- Rank: Chosen One
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@acancello aww, tysm!! glad you liked them 💕💕
I like it a lot!! (I don’t think I’ve read any of your previous writing but I know enough about your story that I’m not totally confused)
One thing I would mention, the lack of contractions feels a little unnatural to me.
Also, out of curiosity, what does C.H.I.M.E. stand for??
Any noun can become a verb if you don't care enough.
@whalekeeper @freedomwriter76
Thank you! Yes, Vikii is already one of my most favorite also!
"Would you kindly...?"
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