WalkByFaith

@rae

I second @ellette-giselle, but I would probably make the larger portion of it Mandin’s, and then a shorter scene/s from Nahim’s point of view. Being inside the mind of a character who’s depressed and delirious can be disorienting (wow, alliteration there lol.) Except if the rest of the book is from Nahim’s POV–then, it might be better just…[Read more]

@freed_and_redeemed

I LOVE THAT SO MUCH

poor Riker <333

@theshadow

If they’re genuine enemies…I’d say just make them constantly arguing or trying to show each other up, and constantly trying to do something better than the other.

Also Pinterest can help a lot with this and give you some ideas!

@theshadow

Anything specific details you want help with?

@lightoverdarkness6

Aww girl I am so sorry, I can’t even imagine how hard that must be!!! You’re so strong for going through that and I promise, everything will turn out the way it’s meant to!! Our Heavenly Father has a wonderful plan of happiness for us, and the trials and challenges we face now will seem like nothing when we return to Him and h…

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@ellette-giselle

Aw I’m sorry! I am the same way so you’re not alone!!!!!!!!!

BUT YOUR SHORT STORY ON YOUR MAGAZINE WAS SO GOOD I GOT CHILLS!!!!

I’ll ask one of my guy friends tonight for ya! XD XD

I get that it would be awkward so I got you girl

@ellette-giselle

Aw I’m sorry :/

I get that! Just let us know if you’re ever sick of critiques and just want to hear the positive stuff to get encouraged!

I’d say…just interview some of your guy friends and ask them to give you a cheat sheet XD XD but I think Whaley’s right, they really do just vibe lol

@keilah-h

Thank you!

And so cool!

@ellette-giselle

Um, yeah. His fear of the unknown already came up a little bit in the barn, and though he got over it there, it is still under the surface and it will come again. I promise.

Maybe you could make his fear a lot stronger, like showing us his thoughts instead of telling us them?

“Well then I don’t see how much help you’ll be,”…

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@rae

lolll facts

@rae

I never thought I’d see the day when Ruth stops collecting DRAGON pics lol

I think the universe glitched out

@RAE
NOOO NOT THE TIGER PICS AGAIN

https://editor.reedsy.com/s/p8SdhuQ

I can still break the record with you guys! Just give me a specific date and I’ll come back for that time!

@linus-smallprint

Thanks!!!! (:

 I like being a sneaky time-traveller. (Huh, apparently we Canadians spell this word with two ‘l’s. Good to know.)

Ohhh that’s interesting!!!

Since I’ll be leaving KP for a bit, I won’t be asking for any more critiques but I’ll leave you the link in case you or anyone else wants to read it for funzies. XD

@whalekeeper

Funny you should mention it because I just had a complete mental breakdown…

A social situation didn’t go very well and I got some super bad thoughts about myself and was beating myself up BIG TIME cuz I feel like I blew one of my only chances to get into a friend group. UGH.

*wipes away the last of the tears and tries to stop…[Read more]

@whalekeeper @ellette-giselle

It might be that you are so used to picturing Aaron’s personality, that your sub-conscience assumes Aaron is known, and thus forgets to describe him.

YES THAT’S WHAT I WAS WONDERING TOO OH MY GOODNESS! I also relate to that XD

The fiercely loyal bit is what I find unnatural. He only met Aaron a week ago, and up till t…

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@ellette-giselle @whalekeeper

My goodness Whaley!!! You put into coherent thoughts what I’ve been trying to say this whole time XD XD I wish I could convey my thoughts as well as you lol!

I have written 63 full length novels and countless short stories… so that’s saying a lot

HOW. LITERALLY HOW. I haven’t even written ONE full novel. I’ve onl…[Read more]