TheShadow

@loopylin

It’s okay. Chase has black hair, pale skin. His irises are usually black, but change color. Green means he has earned your trust. He’s wearing currently a white T-shirt and jeans. Oh, and his arms and hands are noticeably scarred.

One note, if Sef is with Chase, he’d step in front of her and act very different, but I guess Sef isn’t…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium

*is so confused*

Um…..that is the UNDERSTATEMENT of the century lol I was questioning 13 year old Sara’s sanity when I read this….

I’m glad you changed directions with your novel lol.

Ummmmmmmmmmmmm YESSS. I actually thought this junk could get published!!!

THIS IS WHY YOU NEED PLOTTING! OR ELSE YOUR WRITING WILL END U…[Read more]

@trailblazer

Yeah….but the problem is that i’ll have to have implants when I turn eighteen because those teeth will never grow back…so there will be holes in my mouth for eternity. Fun times!

Okay so a backstory-they are Andromedan, but they were kidnapped when they were little and taken to Earth. In this convulated version of a novel, I had it that all Andromedans had purple hair and yellow eyes. They lived a normal human life, etc.

But on Earth all Andromedans take the form of humans, and then the mc’s lost their memory. Now they…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium

Because he’s from Earth and they’re not.

I mean I get where I was going…but it is still really, really dumb.

I WANT TO BURN THIS.

“Because,” Liv says. “You are going to use your powers to bring our parents back. Or else.” What powers?

“Or else what?” Jorryn challenges. Oh great. The last thing we need right now is for Jorryn to get cocky.

“Easy there, ‘spitfire’!” Gael mocks.

“It’s gonna be bad,” Liv assures us.

“You don’t know, do you?” Jorryn…

[Read more]

@jonas

I never ever threw my writing away, no matter how bad it was….i have every single horrible story I ever wrote in a huge binder. I remember thinking the stories were good…and I recently read threw it again and wanted to burn it.

Another embarrasing scene for you:

. Jordan grabbed her arm again and yanked her over to him. He handed her…

[Read more]

@jonas

Mr. Gregory 

“So, will you fight? Or do you yield?”

“False dichotomy,” Gregory grumbled.

“What was that, tyrant?”

Several students had stopped dancing and were now watching them, some curious and some nervous.

“The rules are in place so that these students can enjoy their dance as much as possible, I’m sure. You are not only breakin…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

I think you’re writing her pretty well except she probably isn’t completely calm rn. But she would be pretending to be Babs’ sake, so nvm, it’s good.

Felicity

“Like… angsty depressed teens? Or people who pretend they aren’t depressed, but then you look at them and you can clearly see that they… Ohhh wait, I think I see one.”…[Read more]

@thearcaneaxiom

Well, your punctuation is fine…and it is soooo not as cringy as what I wrote a year ago!

About this scene above:

Proud of it, NO!

Still like it because off Krogen, yeah.

You will see what I mean when I finish it…

@savannah_grace2009

oh my gosh….lol I was reading it and I was like, oh it’s really good! and then I read this sentence:

I can’t tell you what Nahim’s face looked like because he never showed it to anyone.
And then I laughed.

Not mean at all. I consider that sentence the thing the sums up my first draft. Awfulness, awfulness, awfulness. Except.…[Read more]

Oh this is great! I still like this scene…

Nahim walked on. Suddenly his boots hit something solid and metal with a clank. Nahim walked about. (Ruee, what kinda of a sentence is that?!) It appeared to be a circular metal something. *Nahim discovers it’s a base, gets inside, blah blah blah* “Hello, Hello!” (Oh, did I mention I had no idea what…

[Read more]

@rae

oh my gosh….lol I was reading it and I was like, oh it’s really good! and then I read this sentence:

I can’t tell you what Nahim’s face looked like because he never showed it to anyone.

And then I laughed.

sorry if that sounds mean…..

And now for the worst thing I have ever written:

“It worked!” Jorryn cries.…

[Read more]

I shall keep the spelling for effect…

Chapter 1 Nahim and Mandin

Nahim sat cofortably near Mandin liking out over the lake Gaylax. He was young, only being 19 years in age, Mandin was 5 years older and had more expierance but they still got along together well. I can’t tell you what Nahim’s face looked like because he never showed it to anyone.…

[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009 @anyone-else

Ready for some pieces of writing from when I had absolutely no idea what I was doing?

@whalekeeper

Okay, I think Chase’s stutter may return…

@trailblazer

idk….two teeth on the bottom in the back. (not wisdom teeth)

I have teeth that are baby teeth, but there aren’t any adult teeth to replace them, so I was just gonna have baby teeth forever. But the dentist thought they were just gonna break apart someday so he pulled them….

@trailblazer

Oh no!! That sounds horrible!!!

4 hours later and I can actually feel my face and talk and eat food!!! YAY!