Smiley

@jonas

Well, Sef wasn’t at her house when Neveah and Hanna were kidnapped. They were leaving the slums, and were walking down the path. It was a whole “group” thing, if that makes sense.

Sef saw them being taken when she was on her way back from the well.

@jonas

Cassian is Lilitu’s older brother. (I’m pretty sure it’s in there somewhere? idk, now I’m second guessing myself, haha)

I don’t know, I probably should know, but I don’t know where Cassian is, lol. I guess he just wasn’t in the scene? He’s old enough to work, so probably doing that or stealing something to feed his family. Characters are…[Read more]

@rainmaker

Hi Divinity, I’m Sara 🙂 I’m a freshman in high school. You’re going to love KP!

I am working on my WIP, and am trying to fix some problems with it, but I am making some progress (I think???).

I have 2 horses, too many chickens (you can NEVER have too many chickens!!!!), 1 dog, 4 cats, and a herd of cows. We farm and ranch in…[Read more]

@jonas

One thing to consider might be to actually not show what happens to Neveah until later in the story, instead of following her. That way you could linearly follow Sef and Lillitu up through this chapter. Cutting to Neveah and Ottoline after Sef and Lillitu jump off the cliff could be a great way to add tension. Always cut when your audience…

[Read more]

@thearcaneaxiom

Here’s Sef’s reaction:

Chapter 4: Stolen

***revisal, the new segment at the end****

“Hush,” Cassian squeezed her tighter. Sef sobbed into his shoulder.

“I hate you!” she yelled in his ear. At that moment, she really believed it.

“Yes, I know,” he smiled sadly, knowingly. Sef soon got tired of crying and struggling and so she…[Read more]

@thearcaneaxiom

Think of it like your giving your readers a plate with a cheeseburger, but when they reach out to grab it, you pull it away, and throw a burrito at them. Sure burrito’s are great, but the readers were excited for that cheeseburger, and maybe a burrito is better served pushed towards them on a plate, instead of thrown at their f…

[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Haha! Really? I have friends who used to do that, I think it lasted for a couple of years, 😀 My brother is 13, and is the typical 13 year old (gross jokes and humor, things like that XD ) When he was 7 I think he was just obsessed with Legos, but I dont quite remember 🙂

@grcr

Got it!

@acancello

Haha! I’m glad! Hugo is so funny, (I based him off my brother so I have plenty of ideas, lol!)

Oh I bet!

My brother’s more annoying than funny. He’s 7 and likes to pretend he’s a cat and meow ALL THE TIME.

@whalekeeper

Sometimes I bring some taffy or chocolate to school and throw it into a crowd to see what happens.

Oh my gosh that’s hilarious

I should try that! Though my school doesn’t have “crowds”, we’re too small for that, lol. (There’s 120 kids in the whole school, K-12)

@whalekeeper

😂 And I guarantee you will watch it again!

@fernweh_grace

Hi, nice to meet you!

We do have one role play going on that you can join (I know because I made it, lol) if you want. We’re pretty far along, but you can hop in anytime! It’s the one titled “Character Party” on the General Writing Discussions session. If you happen to join, you might want to read all the previous RP’s so you…[Read more]

@hybridlore

Thanks! I also followed you 🙂 The one I did was private with a few pins, is that the right one?

@rainmaker

Hi Divinity ! I’m Acancello, also known as Allison! I’m homeschooled and  I love guinea pigs, dogs, traveling, acting, trying weird food, writing, reading, talking and a lot more 😁! I write Dystopian and post-apocalyptic books. Oooh! A historical fantasy muder mystery sounds exciting! I’m so glad you could come to Kingdom Pen! OK, no…[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Girl I legit started laughing!!!

Haha! I’m glad! Hugo is so funny, (I based him off my brother so I have plenty of ideas, lol!)

@ferwhen_grace

Oh, I just read that, a few things about me?? Hmmm..

I just moved cross country

I have 26 pets (One dog, two Guinea pigs, two parakeets, three ducks, five guinea hens and the rest chickens)

I have been home schooled since first grade.

I do blog, (heres the link if you want to check it out 🙂 )      acancello.blogspot.com

I lo…[Read more]

@trailblazer @acancello @freedomwriter76 @esther-c @grcr @mineralizedwritings

Ottoline

Her hands shook as she fingered the delicate blue fabric. This is for me?  She wondered. What kind of person do they think I am? She could never wear that, she decided. This was too beautiful a dress for someone like her. She ran a hand through her tangled ha…[Read more]

@hybridlore

I’m good, thanks! How are you doing?

@fernweh_grace

Hi! Of course you can be here, everyones welcome 🙂 lets see…. I dont really have the patience to look at moss, my mom and brother love to do it, but I cant really get into it. I do loooove to look at paintings though! I haven’t read any of those books you listed either, but I am…[Read more]

@thearcaneaxiom

Oh, sorry, it is chapter 6!

Well, two years have passed, and Sef has been abused, so that changes her personality a little bit. They both get older and more mature. What do you mean by different, like personality?