Andrew

@linus-smallprint ooof Ender’s Game.

Good example for a dystopian writer, horribly graphic writing (and also the occasional curse words? I remember there being Marvel-level cursing but not much worse).

Luckily I’m not the kind who’s perturbed by violence in writing. Watching it would be a different story, but reading that kind of thing really…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

That works! Just swap wife and son for parents.

@stephie

The one thing I’m going to criticize is what Charles says when his son is saved: 

Okay, I will see what I can do about that. Though I may put this one off for a bit. Thank you for pointing this out. I’m not the most emotional person, so sometimes I struggle with writing em…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Lol, I was wondering when you would start wanting the backstory.

This is a good opportunity to see how someone who has not read Book I can understand this book. Like it or not, some people will start to read your series with Book II, III, or IV. Remember to provide the context for these readers so that they will be able to…[Read more]

You’re not wantonly throwing bloody battle scenes in. You’re writing a realistic impression of a story.

Remember the missionaries to that one South American tribe that were brutally murdered, but the survivors came back to that tribe to continue the mission? Stories like that are what your writing reminds me of. This sounds really weird, but…[Read more]

do the songs have to be lyrical or can some of them be instrumentals?

@ellette-giselle Believe me, these stories are marketed for 8-year-olds:

• Wings of Fire (dragon series I read once with a good deal of violence. One character’s death is so graphic the writer didn’t even describe it, although that was in a side story that I didn’t read though cause it didn’t grab me.)
• Warrior cats series (LOTS of war and…

[Read more]

@freed_and_redeemed yessss I will totally do that!!

now to find some songs.

@freed_and_redeemed just saw this and AWW LEON WHYYYY

it’s such a good piece though

@jonas @loopylin @hybridlore

Marcel – Elderstrand (w/ Ellis, Felicity, Sara)

The group shivered, plastered against the side of the wall. Ellis gave Marcel a warning gesture towards the left street, and stared up at where the soldiers’ feet pattered above.

“Hey!” Their silence didn’t help. One of the soldiers in the street patrol pointed in thei…[Read more]

@grcr

We all make mistakes when making something, it’s okay 🙃

@ellette-giselle

I’m fine with it, but Baron is gonna lose his mind if you do that. lol

Oh you have no idea. Not only is it storming which increases his power, he’s also gonna have to go into fight mode.

@jonas

I’m good with it

and @grcr, oops!

@jonas

I’m fine with it, but Baron is gonna lose his mind if you do that. lol

@rae @raxforge @grcr

@whalekeeper @loopylin @hybridlore

Ellis —— Elderstrand (w/ Marcel, Felicity, and Sara)

“I don’t like this place,” Ellis muttered. “Where do we go now?”

Just then, there was a sound of shouting. Ellis turned and saw soldiers scurrying along the wall above. They were trapped.

There was the sound of a patrol coming down a street to the…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium

I love that idea! Wet and nervous! Perfect!

@jonas

Bring it on!

@jonas @loopylin @hybridlore

Thanks both of you :]

Marcel — Edge of Everstrand

Marcel nodded and grabbed Felicity’s hand. “Hold on tight.”

He lunged for the wall and skipped up, the world turning on its side, and the rain flying into their faces. As he stepped, something white spread outward from the soles of his feet, covering the wall li…[Read more]

@whalekeeper @loopylin @hybridlore

Ellis ——— Elderstrand (outside)

As Marcel spoke, there was a crashbof thunder, and water came pouring down.

”I don’t,” said Ellis. “But I think we’ll be better off inside anyway.”

@whalekeeper

Sure thing. Gimme a minute.

@the_lost-journal

Rina ——— Elderstrand (w/ Jirah and Rosemary)

”Call me Fleet,” said the leader of the group. “There’s no time to expkain everything, but we are here to help you. If you stay, they will kill you. We need to leave. Now.”

Fleet turned and started down the alley, beckoning them on. The others followed. Rina glanced at Jirah and Ro…[Read more]

@jonas

Jonas, please make sure the night scenes don’t completely end before our group can get inside the city 🙏😭 Maybe you can reply to ours, since you have Ellis, and I’ll send everyone in?