Ruth

@rae

Anything works with me! It may take a lot to convince Winston to do anything out of his little bubble but I will do the best I can.

@rae

Oki, I read it!

Overall, I think it’s well-paced and has a great amount of description. I could understand the basic setting and tech even though it isn’t my own world or story. The ship’s name, The Nightmare, automatically makes me want to root for it XD

I especially liked Mandin’s appearance! You used body language, but almost more im…[Read more]

@loopylin @rae

Let’s try this again for the millionth time y’all

Sebzter

Seb stood in between Eddie and Dante, and put his hands on his hips. “I said mingle, not strangle. What’s the beef?”

@rae I love how you’ve just decided Mayfly will be her name for the rest of the RP lol

also what the toothpicks is a skinwalker and why is it terrifying????

Jaylen

“Of course you’re a dragon! I’m not stupid, despite popular opinion. And no, no other dragons-” The small creature looked around. “Well, minus the one outside. He doesn’t a…[Read more]

@loopylin @whalekeeper @rae @koshka @esther-c @elishavet-pidyon @lightoverdarkness6 @anyone-else-idk-lol-XD

Ok, soooooo I’ve been trying to brainstorm for another novel idea of mine that I’ve had for a while and would like to hear some inputs/thoughts

So, thanks to my Mom’s creativity, I finally figured out why Erich, a side character (and…[Read more]

@rae

The reason for this scene is to show struggle. Nahim has kept to himself a piece of his life that comes back to haunt him every other night for four years. I doubt anyone would suddenly spill it all out. And the disappointment is also kinda purposeful, but since this is the second chapter, it’s not too great.

Yeah, that makes sense, but I w…[Read more]

@rae

1. No, not really.

2. If this is the end of a chapter, then no.

3. Yes. I could tell he was reluctant to share anything.

4. A violin or viola.

5. I kind of didn’t trust him. If he continued to be this kind I would come to love him though. I just have trust issues with nice characters. XD. They’re so often evil.

@rae

I’m going to pop in and give my tidbit (because that’s so much more fun than homework).

1. Some scenes need to be short, some long, depending on what’s being delt with. This one may be short, but it’s a good length for the subject.

2. No? It just felt like a wrap up description of Mandin/a scene conclusion/transition to whatever was coming…[Read more]

@whalekeeper @rae

oh yay, it’s time for Dante and the twins drama. I need to put their older versions in a rp at some point so I can actually write them as friends lol

Ellie

As soon as the three boys entered the room, Eddie’s face darkened.

“Dante.” She growled.

“Uh oh.” Ellie breathed.

Dante gave a crooked smile. “Hey, Eddie. Ellie. Glad t…[Read more]

@rae Hiiiiiiiii!!!

First off, your descriptions are absolutely FABULOUS, girl!! Like, I can see this scene so much <3

and now for your questions…

1. Not at all! I think it’s a good length for a scene!
2. nope, I don’t think so!
3. Yessssss, very much so! I really loved the body language and it really conveyed Nahim’s feelings/emotions/fears…

[Read more]

@rae

1. I don’t think the scene is too short. I do have to wonder if it is necessary though. It’s hard to say without context, but it doesn’t seem to move the plot forward really. I also would consider that the reader is likely expecting to hear Nahim’s backstory and feel like they’re being cheated out of it.

2. No, I think it’s fine.

3. Yes. I…[Read more]

@rae

Helloooo, I’m heeeeere

1. Feels like average length to me! Then again it isn’t in book format on KP, and is one continuous page, so I may be gauging it incorrectly. I think if it’s 2-3 pages long on your document, that feels adequate.

2. If it’s the end of a chapter, it works as a summary. If not, I don’t think it’s too abrupt to have in…[Read more]

@rae

Maybe they have to find a special macguffin in the middle of this fairy tale land, that will effectively send them back home? Like Oz? And creatures keep attacking them to protect the special artifact? Just spitting ideas here lol.

@loopylin @rae

There are at least five good teachers tho! There’s Mr. Gregory ofc. Then there’s the art teacher with the red and yellow scarf, Miss Soleil, and the two dance instructors with a romance subplot.

…Granted, I created all of these characters XD But nice adults are underrated in fiction and deserve screentime.
Sebzter
The twins and…[Read more]

@rae

AHHHHHH NOT SKINWALKERS!!!!

*hides in corner*

@rae does he use “bullets” as an exclamation? That’s hilarious.

Jaylen

Someone barged in as she tried to figure out what exactly was going on.

“Freeze! Wait…are you a Fettian?! I thought I was the only one around here! Bullets, another Fettian ruining my fun. Well, don’t say I’m breaking any rules at any point in time cuz I’m not despite p…[Read more]

@esther-c @whalekeeper @koshka @elishavet-pidyon @rae @joy-calle @keilah-h @anyone-else-idk-lol

Sooooo I’m currently working on a scene for one of my novels…and I need some advice😅

The two MCs of this novel have both been imprisoned by Soviet Forces (this is 1950s East Germany, btw) for being involved in the underground church.

It’s…[Read more]

@rae @whalekeeper Agreed. Or we could practice writing morally good adult characters which is a lot harder than I thought it would be.

Dante

“Fine with me.”

@loopylin @rae

I think this school needs help. Like a student council or somethin.

Sebzter

Chase, the detention boy, appeared once more. He was out of breath and quite out of his mind.

As the teacher came towards them, with less enthusiasm than exhaustion, Seb noted the slight vibration coming from their barricade. It would fall down…[Read more]