@princesachronicle22
Active 2 months, 3 weeks ago- Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
- Total Posts: 841
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
Now, you mentioned your characters not knowing God. And I liked how you put that—“without God there is no hope.” But…you have to think that these characters are probably looking for hope, right? Even just an occasional thought of wishing there was a way out of this darkness they’re living in.
So I know with where they’re at right now,…
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Esther replied to the topic Worth All the World in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
LOL I love these parts. 💛💛
Aww, thanks! 🥰 Me too 🤪
Would you want to write this differently… ? before I saw the “she drew out her name” part, my mind read it that she spelled it out. (Maybe I’m just crazy…?)
I don’t knowww 😭 I’ve seen it written like that in books before, but I feel like if I changed it to italics it would carry a differe…[Read more]
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Loopy replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
@ellette-giselle Do you really kill off that many characters? XD
I would’ve gone for the photo. Nothing like a good photo to hold hostage. 😉
I guess my brain just doesn’t work like that. How could that be helpful?
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Esther replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
Bro, I was literally like smashing the submit button and it took forever for that response to post 🤦🏻♀️🤣
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Esther replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
My story is not a lighthearted, hopeful story, at least in the beginning. Right now it’s supposed to be “depressing” and dark. Honestly, to add sprinkles of hope in wouldn’t work for what’s going to happen in the next few chapters. Because right now, none of my characters know God, and so without God there is no hope. I want to…
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
I also hope I didn’t come across as rude or brushing you off…I really do appreciate your thoughts because that means I need to work on foreshadowing! And explaining my book to others helps me flesh out my thoughts a little more! Thank you so much! <3
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SLAYING SARAAAA ✨✨ replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
Ok, so the biggest thing I noticed was the lack of hope throughout the story. The characters seemed to think about death a lot and were put through a lot of physical pain. There’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but it needs to be balanced out with hope. When I got to read those Lilitu/Sef memories from when they were little, that w…
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HighScribe posted an update 1 year, 5 months ago
“I was around small children, so I got small children-ed. It’s when you’re around small children and they give you all their diseases.” – Illustration teacher.
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Loopy replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
a picture from a couple years back of him and Nar having a flour fight (he lost)
Aww cute <3
Hopefully Dante isn’t too upset.
Hehe, no, upset isn’t quite the right word. My boy’s got issues.
Dante
Dante slumped to the ground, holding his throat and coughing. He sat there a while in the dimly lit hall, shoulders shaking as he tried to reg…[Read more]
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Loopy replied to the topic The Chat Chat in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
@whalekeeper Hey, I noticed a thing. Did you change Seb’s last name?
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Loopy replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
My favorite type of magic is finding something that’s already true of the world and making it literal
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Loopy replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
@whalekeeper Thanks <3
I like messing with the idea of a world where almost everything you interact with is alive and has its own character. It’s fun.
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Loopy replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
… May I ask what’s in Alpha’s pockets?
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HighScribe posted an update 1 year, 5 months ago
Goodreads keeps telling me that since I read Pride and Prejudice I should therefore read Twilight and I’ve never been so insulted in my life.
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Loopy replied to the topic Fantasy/Modern School AU RP in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
Liko
Liko gratefully took the two cookies, feeling very spoiled. He had already been offered sweets by two different students, and he hadn’t even eaten breakfast yet. He thanked her again and then answered her question.
“I think it’s nice here. I like my coworkers. Bit unpredictable though. Lots of different people from lots of…[Read more]
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Loopy replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
Oh and I guess I need to throw some too.
@rae @hybridlore @freed_and_redeemed @hypridlore @theducktator @elishavet-pidyon
Throwing 3 snowballs at each of you
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Loopy replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
Here’s what I wrote if anyone wants to see:
In the late morning of one wet April day, the rain had cleared enough that Brea Thorne, age six, could go for a walk with her nanny. And she was beyond ready for it. She jumped and skipped along, looping back every once in a while to her slower paced guardian.
It was about fifteen minutes into t…[Read more]
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Loopy replied to the topic Snowball Fight! in the forum General Writing Discussions 1 year, 5 months ago
@hybridlore Thanks XD I needed the motivation. I got a part of a scene that’s been stuck in my head out finally.
If I had any other older snowballs, I’m just going to forget about them lol
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Esther replied to the topic Worth All the World in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
*gasp* It’s a date!
Yes!! 🤭 In my first draft I actually never wrote a scene of their first study sesh together…do you think I should add that in for the second draft??
When what, Tyler? 👀 I want to know…
I would like to know as well… 🤣
Definitely left that open for the imagination or a future short story ὄ…[Read more]
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Esther replied to the topic NEW and IMPROVED WIP!!!!! in the forum Novel Critique Requests 1 year, 5 months ago
Ok, so I told you I’d finish reading your book by the end of February, and I did! But I only started like two days ago. 🤣 Here are my thoughts! (Excuse any typos, I was doing this in the car, lol!)
Ok, so the biggest thing I noticed was the lack of hope throughout the story. The characters seemed to think about death a lot…[Read more]
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