Mallory O'Bier

@rochellaine  @aislinn-mollisong  @skredder  @clairec  @seekjustice  @anyone

Sorry! Had to run and do a chemistry lab XP  But I’m back! Anyone still here?

Oh, and Rochellaine, congrats on becoming a Knight in Shining Armor! You earned it fast! 😉

@sierra-r  Inadvertently (sort of) brought you in! Haha, thanks! Perhaps I should tag you more often

Ignore me, I’m conducting a test post

@skredder  KPA again. I’m getting to a part about Jane the Pizza Ninja. It’s not helping that I’m starving XD

What genre is Clouded Fury?

@skredder  Eyy! What are you working on?

@aislinn-mollisong  I was just on your Ember doc and…

…during the reign of King West and Queen Alia.”

Like that? 😉

@skredder  @rochellaine  @clairec  @aislinn-mollisong

The Beast is back!! Hi, guys! I’m writing

@sam-kowal Good revisions. (And good synopsis in general, btw. These things are hard.)

Possibly, these three revisions could help.

Feastings end – feasting ends.

Only humans farm in the city of Kurr. Dwarfs would rather win glory in the exosuit arena. When food got low in the winter of 1276, the dwarves robbed us of our crops.

The dwarfs are…[Read more]

@rochellaine, I like it! It’s a great analogy.

I’m writing alternative historical fiction about the Pacific (mainly Australia and Papua New Guinea) in WWII. When I first mentioned that here on the forum everyone’s reactions were “You’re changing history? You can’t do that!” But. Think Captain America (which I haven’t seen, but know the entire…[Read more]

@rochellaine, ah-hah! Another person who isn’t really into fantasy. Isn’t it funny how everyone on here seems to be writing about elves? 😛 I might write some fantasy in the future, but for now my writing tries to stay relatively realistic. Do you read fantasy, or do you just not like it very much?

@Sam-Kowal perfect. 😀

@rochellaine  Hmm…. *smirks*  I like that! It’s unique!

… Wait, so how do you feel about me? Please don’t make me disappear! *prepares to hide under table*

@rochellaine  Absolutely! *whips out character notes* What’s your suggestion?

@rochellaine  Okay I’m back, but only for about twenty more minutes XD

The KPA is actually going to be a whole series of holiday-themed stories. So if you aren’t in this one, you will undoubtedly be in another one. And don’t worry — I won’t make you a creature 😉

@rochellaine  Ahh, I gotta go! Sorry I couldn’t stay longer! I shall return later!

@sam-kowal The idea is definitely intriguing.

As far as the synopsis goes, I agree with Kate that the voice is slightly inconsistent. My main advice though is cut anything you can. Like, “believe me, that tends to curb one’s appetite could be cut. There are a few words you cut elsewhere or phrases you could rephrase to sue less word.

Also, I…[Read more]

@rochellaine  Exactly! And it’s working out!

Cool! BTW I read what you had on the doc, and I really liked it!

@rochellaine  Hi!

Yep, KPA again. I want to get it done by March, so I’ve been working at it a lot

At least I have an idea, a vague one albeit, of what’s going to happen!

What are you working on?

@Sam-Kowal ooh I really like it! Super cool concept. I think I’d definitely pick it up and read it.

On a more writerly note, the synopsis itself is well written, but it does seem a little choppy in places. It may simply be a case of too many fragments. Also, this is bugging me a little and it’s probably just me. But the voice is inconsistent……[Read more]

@dragon-snapper  @catwing  @aislinn-mollisong  @rochellaine  @skredder  @audrey-caylin  @waterlily  @anyone

Let’s see if I can get more writing done… Care to join me?