mcmuffin

@ellette-giselle

Omc where do you find all these quotes? I love them!

@ellette-giselle

Oops I forgot to mention that I deleted the scene with her not wanting to talk to the Great One…so now it’s just the scene with her and Lilitu pretending to be animals.

I really liked it so I put it into the “scene recycling bin” if I need it again, but for now it’s not in the draft.

@everyone

Sixth Chapter!!!

Chapter 6

A Voice

Lir stretched out as far as the eye could see-the crown jewel of Andromeda, the pride of the Pythonos.

Sef stood on the hilltop, overlooking the city, taking in the sights and smells as if she were starving, though she knew she’d never be able to partake in the beauty of it all.

Paynes w…[Read more]

@esther-c

I honestly don’t know XD

Here’s the link you can use (but there’s not a lot of “new chapters”…and the first couple “new” chapters need a lot of redoing, but you can read ahead if you want! Just keep in mind that if you critique them, I’ve seen a lot of the problems already. The new chapters I’m talking about are…[Read more]

@hybridlore

Aww tysm girl that means a lot!!!

And so true!!!!!!

@ellette-giselle

😀 XD

ooo the other boards look good too! The temporarily misplaced quote is funny XD

Oh that’s ok. I was more looking for general response as a reader, not so much critical  feedback as of yet. (though it’s always welcome.)

Ah, ok! 😀

@ellette-giselle

I think it’s good! Intriguing. I don’t really have any thoughts in a critical sense, and I’m not the best person to ask… but I do like it! The last part was pretty sad to read!

Ugh, I’m sorry that it took me a while to respond…😓😓

(also I love the board!)

@ellette-giselle

Mm. Yeah, I guess it’s not bad at all then! 🙂🙂

@esther-c

Livia

“I’m an Aquino,” she shrugged. “I was born with it.”

She formed a miniature waterspout over her hands and watched it whirl, then letting it fall into a small puddle at her feet.

@ellette-giselle

woah….

It definitely does sound interesting.

I feel like them talking out all of their plans for a whole chapter/prologue isn’t the most… eye catching… at least in my opinion…

But then again, I feel like this could set up for the following chapter pretty well—especially if the next one jumps right in a bit.

I also agree with…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Oh no! I’m so sorry again…

I need to spend some time with my sister, we’re about to do a Bible study!

I feel sooo bad, but I have to go….I’m sorry!

It’s writing nonstop until whatever time you set. Like I usually go for fifteen to thirty minutes, and write about 1-2K words if I get enough inspiration.

If you want, you can…[Read more]

@grcr

Aww thanks girl <3

@ellette-giselle

Don’t be sad!!!! I only thought of it because the whole scene felt winter and cold and dead to me. Like those feelings just mirrored Sef’s. It was you writing her so well that made me think of it. Actually, the other day i was thinking, “Man, she is so good! Look at hers compared to mine!” lol.

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Oh no I’m so sorry…I didn’t see this!!!

Could we maybe still do it now??

I understand if you can’t XD

@ellette-giselle

I like that!!!!!!

YES I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THE COVER

@savannah_grace2009

I like this chapter a lot! (And the one you shared before it—I meant to reply to that one but I didn’t have a moment 😅)

Cassian is a good friend! 😍❤️❤️

Um… I know you were asking Ellette… but I don’t think your chapters are cringey.

@ellette-giselle

I would love to! I don’t know if I’ll have much time but I’ll try!

@jonas

Yeah, you could do them as separate chapters, and that should work. But also, be careful about waiting too long before launching into the bulk of the story. I don’t believe we’ve even reached the inciting incident yet, and you don’t want the reader to be thinking “let’s just get on with it!” You probably still have a little bit of wiggle r…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Ok, that was just a cringe for me me because of the way our country is trying to use that to justify some really horrid stuff. What if the line was,

“No, not like me,” Cass laughed. “Be like the Great One, Birdie.”

After all, Christ is our example.

Good point. I wasn’t trying to copy the people who are like “be yourself” or “fol…[Read more]

@jonas

Okay! I was just playing around with the idea of jumping ahead as quickly as possible yet keeping a few similarities. So should I made each it’s own chapter after adding more to it?

I could use them as flashbacks!

But idk, I also like them in my book…I have to think about that.