Linus Smallprint

@ellette-giselle

We do NOT want a solution. In fact, we often hate the idea of a solution because then we feel like you guys are just viewing us as a problem to be fixed.

This makes no sense to me.

Have you ever seen the video “It’s Not About The Nail.” ?

That was on my mind as I was typing up my response.

Yeah, that could work……. Do you think it…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

So the emotions I see emerging the strongest from Aaron right now are stubbornness, jealousy, and frustration.

I should clarify, that these are more of the negative emotions. There will be grief in there as well.

Another thought. Different guys have different ways of expressing anger. Some punch things, some start accusing others…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Hm…

Of course, every guy is different, so it is a little tricky to answer this question. I have thankfully never lost a friend or family member who is close to me, so I am not even entirely sure how I would respond, but I do have my guesses. I would likely be upset with what happened, but I am not a very emotional person. I…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I think i might leave it alone, because the majority of my readers are fine with it, and I have also read many books that do this and have never had any complaint with them.

Okay, that’s fine then.

Might just be best to show you…… it’s basically a collection of images pulled off the internet that have things to do with your chara…

[Read more]

Congratulations @ellette-giselle!

@keilah-h, thank you for the challenge! It was fun to try to draw in a more Clone Wars style than my usual one.

Also, anyone interested in character aesthetics?

Sorry, I’m not sure extatically sure what this means.

@ellette-giselle

Oh, you killed off some major characters. Somehow I knew right when Aaron started calling for Turin in battle that he would find his friend dying. Major blow to his faith there. Poor Sabina and Aaron. And now there is no royal heir for the country either.

do it’s an alternate reality. For instance, the Empire is Rome set in t…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

HEY, THANKS SO MUCH! You know, that’s the first time anyone has ever said that to me.

It is a flaw of ours that sometimes we grow proud of our beliefs. Knowledge puffs up (1 Cor 8:1). I don’t want to let this pride get in the way of seeing the truth and then misleading people. This is why I am willing to listen to any c…[Read more]

@keilah-h

so yeah, I’m terrible at deducing characters’ future reactions and intentions

Hey, this just means that when things you do not predict happen, you enjoy the story more. Being able to properly guess what is going to happen all the time ruins stories. And maybe you are right, maybe you aren’t. Don’t assume you are wrong until the story’s end.

@ellette-giselle

Just finished the last two sections, and they are fine. I find that the more the Bible is referenced and the more that characters just accept Israel as a place, the more I want to know where this place is in the world. It is clear that is connected to our world, but I want to know how and why Aaron can openly talk about the Bible…[Read more]

Also, @ellette-giselle, I would encourage you to continue to share your beliefs and convictions. I do want to know what you have to say, and I want to make sure that my writing does glorify God and not glorify anything wrong.  I have already made some changes to my story from the first draft because of some concerns I had, and if need be, I am…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I disagree with Oliver. I think There is no excuse for doing evil.

Good. Don’t. Oliver may be friendly, but he is a bit of a worldly wiseman… er… wisegorb.

Oh because Martha’s father is the one who found the wizard in the woods, and the wizard was Alan’s father! It’s all making sense now! If I’m right………….

I can’t say now,…[Read more]

I don’t have a problem with holding hands before marriage either, it’s just mainly the way Aaron thinks about it.

@ellette-giselle

My dad said that it’s the natural way for a guy to think, and he has to overcome that through God’s grace. Is it a bad scene? I can cut that thought if you think it would be better…….

Maybe just remove that one thought where he wonders what holding her hand will be like. I don’t have a problem with him thinking she looks pretty.…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle @keilah-h @loopylin @stephie @theshadow

Next chapter. I wrote this faster than I thought I would, so you are getting is several days early. In exchange, you will be forced to wait after a cliffhanger that was more exciting than the previous one because I will likely not be writing much on the weekend. (I know, I know. I want to…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Now the stakes are rising. I feel like the war and Aaron’s mission are closer tied together now that the prince is a Christian and the war is causing Aaron to doubt.

Yes, I do think Aaron’s character is improving with his growing doubt. It does make him more relatable. He is also starting to show some pride issues. Use these…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Ack! Awkward romantic moments!

See the mettle armor?

I think you mean ‘metal’ here. Good to see armour thought, it always helps things feel more medieval.

So Aaron has managed to work his way up to the prince. I wonder where this will go, but I feel the prince may eventually become a Christian as well, though it could go the…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

You used “whipped” instead of “wiped”

Not the first time I’ve done that. Alan has had his memory whipped by before (which I guess means he was whipped until he forgot what he was supposed to? I don’t know), but as my friend said when he noticed that, “when there’s a whip, there’s a way.”

So, you have the next one?

I am going t…[Read more]

Some tags decided not to work again. Let’s try that once more:
@keilah-h @loopylin @stephie @theshadow

@ellette-giselle @keilah-h @loopylin @stephie @theshadow

Next chapter. As Ellette predicted, things start to get messy here.

Chapter the 10th: (https://editor.reedsy.com/s/T1bLc1N/c/ZqPt_58SO73q86vE/chapter-the-10th)