Lightningmouse

Everyone stares at me expectantly. I look around, waiting for someone to talk. The man with red hair folds his hands on the table.
“Whenever you’re ready,” he says, impatiently.
I slowly rise from my chair. “Um…well, to be honest, I’m not really sure what’s going on here.” I glance at the big man, and his expression is confused but also cold.…[Read more]

“Of course we have!” she replied, looking at me as if I was out of my mind. Which, at this point, it wouldn’t surprise me if I was.
“Come sit,” she told me, and she put her stiff hands on my shoulders and guided me to a chair. As I was pushed down on my seat, I noticed everyone else at the table was staring at me. I sheepishly grinned, and…[Read more]

Writing: because going completely insane is not something I relish; because it gives me an excuse to indulge in flights of fancy without being called mentally crazy; because I’ll never fight orcs or armies of evil dwarves in real life; because the Truth needs to be hear everywhere; because I care, maybe too much; because God has given me a gift…[Read more]

Wow. Did I ever need this forum to happen. I just read through my stories’ beginnings, and most of them have almost no hook at all. Peter Pan might like that, but my readers will possibly find them a little dull!

Anyways, this beginning was one of my favorites. It’s from a Marvel fanfic that I’m not really working on right now, but just wanted to…[Read more]

You know you’re a writer when you are so attached to your characters that you wish they were real people, and then you start imagining the conversations you would have with them.

This is a great topic! You’re the complete opposite of crazy, Kate!

I love books where the first sentence is a quote that a character says. To me, it just gives immediate curiosity (Also because I am better at writing dialogues than descriptions/scenes. 😛 I know; not good). It feels like you’re immediately put in the action, and if it’s…[Read more]

This is a great topic! You’re the complete opposite of crazy, Kate!

I love books where the first sentence is a quote that a character says. To me, it just gives immediate curiosity (Also because I am better at writing dialogues than descriptions/scenes. 😛 I know; not good). It feels like you’re immediately put in the action, and if it’s…[Read more]

YES! Love opening hooks! 😀
This is one of my favorite ones I’ve done:
“My wormhole experiment took a little bit to actually start working. Which was great that it worked at all, but the thing was that it started right in the middle of class.”
*sigh* I need to write more on that… someday.
Also, there’s a kids’ book one that I love:
*plain, white…[Read more]

Ooo, I like it @zoe-wingfeather! Like other people noted, I would watch out for info-dumping. For example, the writing in bold below, to me is a bit info-dump-ey…I struggle with the same thing, by the way. 🙂

I sigh. Work is so boring. I’m a secretary for a big computer company, and pretty much all I do all day is file papers.

The story is r…[Read more]

LOVE IT MY GOODNESS. 😀 So fun!
The info dumping wasn’t as huge of a problem for me, but I think most of the stuff you said could probably be interspersed as its relevant to the story.
That, and probably make a few more paragraph breaks near the beginning. Just… less intimidating than a huge chunk of text, if ya know what I mean. XP
Give us…[Read more]

I’m back! 😛 Sorry. Meant to carry this on sooner…

My feet come to rest on a carpet I most certainly haven’t seen before. Expensive Persian fluff. No one in their right mind would ever let me near that sort of thing. Though that thought does no favors to any idea of how I got here…
It has to be a dream.
But, standing up and promptly stubbing…[Read more]

@anna-brie
I’d look into the functions more if the regular test isn’t working out for you. It’s a bit more specific that way.

@zoe-wingfeather
I’m not sure, having never used blogger. But on wordpress, usually if I copy and paste a blogger into the “follow new blog” thing it works just fine. (Though the posts are delayed about a day or so to show up in the reader.)

Now that I just looked back at the beginning of your chapter, it’s really just that paragraph that starts with I glance over to the mirror on the wall… that has a lot of info. 🙂

@zoe-wingfeather
Hmmm…I am very interested! Hope you don’t mind if I point out one thing that I noticed: I think the beginning is good but the reader is given a lot of information in just a few paragraphs. (And by the way, I struggle with info-dumping…like, majorly!) Other than that I really liked it!!! 🙂 Nice job, Chloe.

C’mon, guys. Should I write the next part, too? Restart?