HighScribe

Realized I had forgotten all about Alan’s horse, Trace. Whoops! I’m going to have to go back and fix that.

@theducktator

Thank you for the typo fix!

@highscribeofaetherium

Nice fox. I think this looks very neat!

@ellette-giselle

Please be honest as y’all read this, because saving the boys is going to be a HUGE change. However, I think it may be the right one, and some interesting things happened that makes me think so. However, I am still on the edge, and I want to know in your honest opinion which direction seems best to take. (of course we all love A…

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@grcr

I love that!! I love how you can see so much personality in each person! <33

@loopylin

So cuteee! Yesss, she needs to become a new character!!

@highscribeofaetherium

That looks soo good!!!

@elishavet-pidyon

The humor in that chapter is so good. lol.

@elishavet-pidyon

Good, good. I’m glad this is better.

Yesterday we reached Acts 12 in a sermon series at our church, and I almost started laughing because it was pretty perfect. So yeah, that’s where I got my inspiration.

@raxforge

The ship.

The way you interact with one another would be very awkward if you weren’t.

Just saying.

@ellette-giselle

Hey, he can’t hear me. 🤭

Okay, cool. Looking forward to the next section!

@hybridlore

Asher would not appreciate you bringing that up again. lol.

No, not much to rewrite. Just a little.

@ellette-giselle

Gotcha. Yeah, no problem. He did faint, so there obviously was enough blood lost for that. You’re good! So, does this mean you’ll have to rewrite a lot of what you already have, or not much since you’re about to have Joseph leave?

@hybridlore

Okay, I see what you mean. Eric was just teasing when he was being formal.

I’m envisioning a much larger cut. As I said, a “gash”And actually, depending on where the cut is, you can bleed out.Maybe not from something like that, though. That might be overdoing it. This is my first draft of this section. 😉

@ellette-giselle

Overall, it was pretty good. Some of the dialogue towards the end felt a tiny bit clunky, though.

Very well,”” Eric sighed. “I shall bare the displays of emotion for tonight, but by tomorrow hugs will be limited to once a month.”

This is funny, but it sounds old-fashioned all of a sudden. Is Eric just teasing? Does he lapse i…[Read more]

@hybridlore

So, now that I’m going with this version, do you have any overall thoughts about the section?

@rae @raxforge I was kind of shipping you guys in my head already, but I didn’t want to say anything in case it was completely wrong. That’s cute though. 🥲💕

@hybridlore

Okay, that’s reasonable.

You win.

@ellette-giselle

1. It gives the reader more hope in a happy ending.

2. It’s more interesting because you play on the past events of the book to make readers think Asher and Eric will die, but then defy the stereotype, keeping them on their toes.

3. It saves Asher and Eric. 🤗

@hybridlore

No, you can’t just say that. Give me a literary reason why I should do this rather then the other one. Why is this better?

@ellette-giselle

YES! Much better. Thanks so so much!

@hybridlore   @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @grcr

ALTERNATE NEXT SECTION!!!!!

Please be honest as y’all read this, because saving the boys is going to be a HUGE change. However, I think it may be the right one, and some interesting things happened that makes me think so. However, I am still on the edge, a…[Read more]