Gwyndalf the Wise

@jonas

Mr. Gregory 

“So, will you fight? Or do you yield?”

“False dichotomy,” Gregory grumbled.

“What was that, tyrant?”

Several students had stopped dancing and were now watching them, some curious and some nervous.

“The rules are in place so that these students can enjoy their dance as much as possible, I’m sure. You are not only breakin…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

I think you’re writing her pretty well except she probably isn’t completely calm rn. But she would be pretending to be Babs’ sake, so nvm, it’s good.

Felicity

“Like… angsty depressed teens? Or people who pretend they aren’t depressed, but then you look at them and you can clearly see that they… Ohhh wait, I think I see one.”…[Read more]

@freedomwriter76

Oh I’m so excited for this!! I joined kp after you started the fanfic, so I didn’t get to follow along from the beginning.

@whalekeeper

Felicity

“Hey, wait, hold on.” Felicity held both of Babs hands in hers and looked her in the eye. “Whatever’s happening, it’s not one bit your fault. Marcel’s not a child.” She quickly scanned the room, trying to spot Calvin or Lois. “Would looking for him help you feel better?”

@hybridlore

Yeah, that totally makes sense! And you’re welcome, I really enjoyed reading it!!

For buildup, I’m not quite sure. Maybe Mason has a big decision to make, and something about the king helps him make that decision? Or maybe to keep it more line with what you have so far, something big rests on the identity of the king?? I’d have to…[Read more]

@hybridlore

Okay, I’m finally here!! XD

So, I was digging pretty hard to find something to critique, so I’ll do my best…

“A hint of fear is smothered in the master’s gruff tone.” – why the fear?? Just because of the curfew?

I agree that it was pretty obvious the man was going to be the king.

In first person it’s really easy to use “is” a lo…[Read more]

@jonas

Mr. Gregory 

“If you would like to keep your boots, and you are not going to dance, I suggest you then step outside.”

@jonas Don’t worry, he won’t fight Riina.  I’m going to do something else

@jonas

He’s a grumpy old war veteran who can use magic but prefers to use weapons. He’s also the best sword fighter from his world. He only teaches math at this school to keep an eye on Felicity and Lois, my other characters.

@jonas Mr. Gregory. He’s also known as the General to people from his world.

@lydibug Yeah, sure! They can be at the practice now. Should I rp, or do you want to?

The General would definitely win a duel, but I don’t think I want him physically fighting a student XD

@jonas  @highscribeofaetherium @rae

Well this escalated quickly…

OH! And I have Hallie and Easton who I have not RPed for yet but will do so now…

…

Easton

“So, are you glad you came? You seem very confident with that waltz now.”

“Yep!” Hallie flashed him her signature smile. “I’m glad you came along.”

Easton bobbed his head in a small laugh. “Anytime. But…” he peered over the heads of students. “Looks lik…[Read more]

Oki. I don’t know how y’all want to switch it up, but I have Fynn, Callista, Lukas, Ami, and Ev available for any other charries to dance with rn. XD So take your pick, lol.

@savannah_grace2009

Ooh, I love it. 😁 I love dogs too. 😝

@rae

Nahimmmm!!! 😭

@hybridlore

I like it!! I can’t really think of any thing else to add besides what the others have said. But there was one paragraph that I was a little confused at:

My gaze snaps back to the ground. The source of the voice stands beside me—a man, maybe in his thirties. From his clothes and his unshaved face, he appears to be a worker of some kin…

[Read more]

@trailblazer

Oh yeah, our tree is super full every year. And Mom and Dad don’t even put all of their ornaments on it. XD

Yessss! I’m in! Now that the holidays are over, I should be able to get back into a normal routine of writing again. (:

Actually, I might not actually add those new characters…