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@booksandbeakers
What was the little girl doing when she was sitting down? Taking a break? It just kind of seems like she’s not doing anything (which is fine too), but it kind of seems like she’s just waiting for her father to call her.
What part of the girl died? Did she play music too, and now she can’t?
Ohh, suspense!! Why is she going to break out! (ar; audience reaction. This is my reaction, and whenever I do so ar, you don’t need to comment on it. It’s positive feedback!)
A little description of everything might be nice. I like how you described the school as sad and dark. She gets happy towards the end of the school day, which would change her thinking from ‘everything is sad and dirty,’ to ‘the flowers were dancing in the wind, and the clouds chased each other.’
Woah, that past! I like it. Although, that significance does it hold? That the Kershaw’s are rich and mean? If we know this, but the MC doesn’t, it just kind of feels a little off.
(Sorry, I got halfway through this and commented some more, but my other comments got wiped away. I might finish reading this, it really is good!
Hi! That sounds amazing! Although, historical fiction has never really been for me. I did try it once. XD But I love reading about medieval stories, like Ivanhoe.
@booksandbeakers
Of course I will! Thanks for the tag! I was looking through the comments, and it seemed like you had a few questions (although I don’t have a solid understanding of which ones). Would you like me to give some critique?
@booksandbeakers
Thank you!
1. I really like the False Prince, by Jennifer A. Nielsen.
2. Definitely swimming, although I used to do Gymnastics.
3. My favorite color is in a battle between orange and purple. I can’t decide. XD
How about you?
Good to know! Thanks! XD I hope everybody doesn’t think I’m ignoring them . . . I really like Where No One Goes too!
XD Already in! This is my 4th time doing it. I’m part of the Reindeer. Thanks for the invite, though! <3
I actually do have Of a Flock out to read in two websites! Wattpad and Archive of Our Own. I’m Gold_Hummingbird in both of those too, just with a mechanical yellow jacket for the pfp. Can you post works here in Kingdom Pen too?
Hi, Michrophage! It’s nice to meet you too!
1. My favorite subject in school is English.
2. I like to write fanfictions and later change them into my own OC books. XP
3. Yes, I do have fanfictions! I have three of them! And I have a finished book for two of them, and I’m about to finish another book for my newest fandom. My three fandoms are ROTTMNT, Alan Backer, and Dream SMP.
4. I used to absolutely adore HTTYD. Now, I enjoy it, especially since dragons are something I love, but it wouldn’t become a fandom.
Aww, thanks! It always gets me excited when people love my works. X)
Right now, that fanfiction Of a Flock is about Dream. Later, though, because it’s not seeped with Dream SMP lore, I’ll change the name and most things around to make it my own story.
Actually, that story idea sounds amazing! Definitely something I would want to read. 🙂 (Is Luca or Teilo the prince?)
Ooh, another CWW! XD
1. I would honestly like to go to Germany. They seem like cool people to me.
2. No writing limitation? I pretty much have that anyway, so sometimes I write a chapter a day, and sometimes I write 15 words.
3. Hmm, lemmie find a loophole . . . I think I would rather publish one bestselling book. If I personally can’t publish any more books, then I’ll find somebody who can put their own name on it, and just give me most of the credit. 😉
Hello! I love volleyball too!!
0. We met each other a few days ago, during a Crazy Writing Week that is currently going on. It was @godlyfantasy12 who actually told me about Kingdom Pen.
1.  I love cats.
2. My dream vacation would probably be to either go to Hawaii or Germany.
3. I love fruits better. 😉
4. Honestly, I really admire Jennifer A. Nielsen and Gordon Korman. They both have such amazing books that you just can’t put down.
Hi!
1. My favorite theme for books is action and adventure, sprinkled with humor.
2. Yeah, I like snakes! Some of them look awesom!
3. Boom, by Italobrothersmusic, the German kind.
How about you?
Thanks!
1. My dream job is to be an author and an animator (Meaning I draw cartoons, memes, ect. and post them on YouTube.)
2. (Lol, I am currently writing an avian book. Avians are half humans and half bird.) I think I like the Violet-backed Starling. They look so pretty with their shiny wings!
It’s a fanfiction right now, but I will change it later.