[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore

awesome!

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@linus-smallprint

 

Nooooo! I am losing my only guy feedback person! 😱

 

I understand that though.

 

A World War II spy story!

Funny you say that….. I currently am writing a WWII spy story. F.O.S. But no, this is not WWII.

 

 

@hybridlore

I plan on starting asap if I’m to get two books rewritten, edited, formatted, and printed by Christmas. That’s not very far away.

So I was hoping for next week (the beginning of June) on Monday. Is that too soon?

 

@koshka

Wow really! That is so encouraging!

 

 

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@koshka

Really?! Ah yay!!!

 

Wait, you think it needs to be published?! Woah!

 

Okay, so you’re saying you’ll only give feedback in email, not KP? Or did I misunderstand that completely?

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@jonas

Okay…… I put yes…. but that honestly depends on what kind of time I have. I may have to drop back to feedback…. or nothing.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore

 

Wait really!!!!

 

*jumps around cheering*

 

Yahoo!!!!

 

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@keilah-h

Oh, I write all of the above plus some. idk. The MC is a teenage guy in most of it, but then so were Joseph and Aaron. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@keilah-h

Aw thank you so much!!! I can’t wait. Yay! One member has joined the team!

What do your brothers love so much about it?

I hope you can discover that, because I don’t know…………

 

 

 

 

 

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore    @keilah-h

 

Thank you, thank you, thank you very much. *twirls hat dramatically because for some reason that is the mental image I have* Feedback like this is always super helpful.

 

In answer to Hybrid’s question, this book is about the length of the first one with the middle two being the longest. I just submitted really big section because I was trying to pick up the pace.

 

Ooo, interesting picture ideas. We shall have to see.

 

@hybrid @ Keilah      @freed_and_redeemed       @koshka     @keilah-h       @elishavet-pidyon       @linus-smallprint

 

Okay. So the thing that I have in mind that is gonna make y’all run or attack me is this…….

 

There is another series.

It’s two books.

Book 1 and book 2.

It was another that I wrote several years ago, but it’s got a plot line I just don’t want to let go.(Actually, I might survive not publishing this, but my brothers wouldn’t)

When I wrote it, they read it out of my notebooks and loved it. When I did the first rewrites, they loved it more. When I did the third and fourth re-writes, they would go and stand by the printer waiting for the next chapters.

Every time I talk about publishing they beg me to publish them.

 

So, here is my crazy plan. I’m going to release them simultaneously as a Christmas special which will rack up some sales for my business, and I can surprise the boys by giving them the two books for Christmas!

 

Such a good plan, there must be a catch.

 

There is.

 

It is in desperate need of another rewrite, and in even more desperate need of fresh eyes to come in and rip this thing up and just tear the mess out of it, because I feel like I’m stuck in a rut. I have axed the MC out of the second book and completely changed the premise, and I feel more confidant about it, but the MC of the first book is good, and I think I’m sticking to the outline, though I will pull some things from book 2 into book 1.

 

Now y’all can see where this is going…..

If I am to have it printed by Christmas I need help. Big time.

Anyone who doesn’t wish to join this is totally fine to back out now. If no one wants to help…….. I’m not sure what I’ll do. 😅 We’ll see if that happens.

 

But, for those of you who will help…. that would be awesome!

 

Your mission, should you chose to accept it, is to analyze, read, tear into, and help me figure out this book. It’s going to be a tough grind on my end, but I think I can pull it off if y’all would be willing to help. If I could also have some grammar Nazis nailing this, that would be wonderful, because then I could skip a few of the editing levels. As always, should you or any member of your team be caught or killed, the secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions. This message will self district in five seconds. Good luck.

 

So yeah…… anyone willing to give it a shot?

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@freed_and_redeemed      @hybridlore     @koshka     @keilah-h       @elishavet-pidyon       @linus-smallprint

 

 

 

QUESTIONS!

 

 

Characters:

~Which character(s) did you find the most compelling/relatable/believable and why?

~ Were there any character that need to be more engaging? If so, how would be some good ways for me to do that?

~Where the characters believable?

~ Were there any characters you wanted to see more of?

~ Do you feel like by the end of both books, the MCs, (and important side characters to some extent) reached he places they needed to be, or were their any character arcs that felt unfinished, incomplete, or contradictory.

 

Note: Please keep in mind that I can’t full develop every character within the story, otherwise there wouldn’t be enough spotlight on my MC. My MCs are Julian and Leon.

 

 

Storyline:

~ Was the plot solid?

~ Did the pacing feel consistent throughout the book? If not, where did it lag or feel dull?

~Was there anything that seemed unbelievable or forced?

~ Were there any plot twists or surprises that stood out to you?

~ Was the ending fitting and satisfying? (not only for this book, but as a close to the entire saga?)

~ Were any parts of the story confusing or difficult to follow?

~ Were there any unresolved plot threads you wish had been dealt with in this saga?

~ Was the balance between action, dialogue and description smooth in the story?

 

Theology/Message:

~ Any theological concerns for the story?

~ What would you say my world view was?

~ What would you say was the message of the story?

~Were the characters’ struggles dealt with effectively?

 

Extra:

~ What was your favorite part of the book overall?

~What was your least favorite part?

~Who was your favorite character?

~Who was your least favorite? (if you have one)

~Is there anything that you would say needs to be changed?

~ Which scenes would you want to see illustrations for?

~ What would you say the target audience of this book would be?

~ Favorite book in the Saga overall?

~Favorite character(s) in the entire Saga?

~Did this Saga flow well from beginning to end, and did it have a good end?

~Any favorite scenes in the Saga that you can remember from over all four of the books?

~ Any other thoughts

 

Aaannnddd I think that’s all. Phew.

 

Okay, I’m tempted to say something that’ll make y’all kill me.

I might wait.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@linus-smallprint

I will. It’ll be a bit odd this time because I feel like I already asked most of them on LOS. I should have a few though.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@linus-smallprint

 

Yay!!! Linus saves the day. Why didn’t I think of that with Flavia? 🤦🏼‍♀️

 

Good. Good. I’m glad the time skip works.

 

The person was an acolyte of the priests who saw what happened.

 

Thank you for sharing your series with us! If I remember correctly, it was just about a year ago that you started posting the first book on here, right?

Aw, you’re so welcome!

Thank YOU for all the help. All of you have been so kind and helpful. Never could have rewritten this without help.

 

Yeah… I think so! A year sounds right.

 

 

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore

Okay, I only got one.

 

idk if you saw my email, but it won’t let me past your safety measures.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore

Where are the links?

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@keilah-h

Lolol. You’re welcome.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Ellette Giselle]

@hybridlore

Oh yay!! I was so sad when I went to comment and realized I couldn’t.

Fires will rise to testify that 2+2=4. Swords will be drawn to prove that leaves are green in summer

[Author]

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