Abigail.M.

(Paris) “Why’d i need to do that? the gravitys low and I spent more than you’re worth on those bionics.”

(Jake) “point taken.”

(Jake, irritated) “Better be prepared to spend more money if i fall.”

(Ok to preface the next 2 pages (7&8) they’re both different versions of the same part, but I accidentally put them both in. I was thinking of keeping both somehow as a way to help indicate the travel of Jake)

(Paris) “Is it behind some mountains?”

(Jake) “Yep.”

“Did you pack me anything for climbing?”

(Paris) “how’s the nav?”

(Jake) “I’m about to find out.”

*taps side of helmet*

“I see the target.”

(Jake) “travel successful.”

“ansible working?”

(Paris) “positive.”

*portal turning off in background*

I want to convey that going through a portal is a bit jarring to go through by having the character stumble through it.

I was thinking of merging this page with the one under it and doing a full-body shot of the character coming out of the portal

I liked the idea of opening this with an establishing shot of the moon this story is taking place on, slowly panning to an isolated portal. (there because the portal had no structure built around it yet)

You’re fine! FINALLY figured something out lol!

I was thinking of going with Exiles as the working series name, Ice as working name for the arc, and calling this first part episode 1