Writing a child with Autism?

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  • #130884
    Gwyndalf the Wise
    @gwyndalf-the-wise
      • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
      • Total Posts: 404

      @freedomwriter76

      Okay, take #2, let’s see if this works. XD

      Cool that you’re considering having a character with autism! *curiosity returns* May I ask what inspired you to consider that?

      So, autism. The word autism comes from a greek word that I don’t remember and means “self-centered” or “self-absorbed”. Autism used to be considered a type of childhood schizophrenia. So, the diagnostic criteria has changed a lot since then. For your character to be diagnosed in that time period, your character would probably have to be a level three but you might be able to get away with a level two… This is because autism level one used to be called ‘Asperger’s Syndrome’. With your research into WWII and Nazis, you may or may not be familiar with Hans Asperger, whom the syndrome was named after (even though he wasn’t the first person to recognize it). I don’t know where your character lives or when they live so…that could be an interesting way to tie in a bit of history, but it could also be really tragic and sad. On another history sidenote, this character’s parents are probably going to get accused of ‘neglecting’ or ‘not loving’ their child enough (also known as the ‘refrigerator mother theory’), because that was a common belief back then.

      So, symptoms. People’s symptoms don’t actually go away. But, there are ways of making the symptoms less obvious. Masking is the dominant way, which is basically taking the advice “fake it till you make it” and applying it to every aspect of your life. Yeah, it’s not good, but it gets results.
      Also, keep in mind that if this character has a personally relationship with the Lord, the Holy Spirit is capable of getting them to understand whatever He needs them to understand in the moment, so that can be a way to bypass that. Though I’d be careful about over-using it or it’d seem unrealistic.
      Sensory Issues: There are two different types of sensory issues, but most people have a combination of the two. The first type is sensory avoidant. They can’t handle loud sounds, certain tastes, smells, bright lights, hugs, etc. (Although the hugs thing isn’t necessarily just autism related, people can have a clump of nerve endings by their spine that are really sensitive and if you touch them it shoots pain down the nerves, or at least that’s what my doctor said.) The second type is sensory seeking.  So, someone who enjoys super loud/vibrational music, hugs too hard, loves strong tastes and smells, etc.
      Self-Stimulitory Behaviors (or Stims, Stimming, for short): Everyone, regardless if they have autism or not. Drumming your fingers on a table, messing with your hair, fidgetting with a pencil or pen, are all stims. The difference with autism is that that the stimming is excessive and unusual (at least while they’re little). As Loopylin talked about, people with autism struggle with regulation, whether that be emotions or sensory processing. Stimming is a tool for helping regulation, so we’re more likely to stim when emotional or overwhelmed. Sarafini, Loopylin, and GodlyFantasy have already given you some examples of stimming, but here’s a list: Hand flapping, rotating your wrists, spinning (think little kids going in circles), pacing, walking in a pattern, the cassinette snap (snapping all of your fingers instead of just your middle one), drumming your legs while seated, moving your pencil through your fingers, repeating words or phrases (either aloud or in your head) (although that can also fall under echolalia), rubbing your neck or face hard, rubbing your thumb over your knuckles, rocking, watching sand timers or lava lamps or falling glitter for a long time and not doing anything else, listening to the same song on purpose on repeat, etc.
      And that’s by no means an exhaustive list…XD
      Literal Thinking/Black and White Thinking: These aren’t the same thing, but I think it’s easier to talk about them together. Everyone thinks literally until a certain age. Because autism is a neuro-developmental disorder, figurative thinking is delayed, or in some cases the person doesn’t reach that point of development. So, we have to work to think abstractly. Because of this, we can struggle to understand what isn’t concrete: metaphors, idioms, sarcasm, etc.
      Black and White thing, also known as rigid thinking, is the struggle or inability to understand others’ points of view, the fact that there is more than your own view, and over or under generalizing things. The Sally-Anne Test is really good at showing this as long as the person hasn’t taken it before. Here’s an example: Santa Claus. My family has never celebrated Christmas with Santa Claus as a part of it. We were taught that S.C. was fake, and a tradition that other families liked to do. Well, in third grade, I met a girl that was very passionate about her belief that Santa Claus was real. At the time, I thought the girl was blatantly lying to me and my friends, and I was mad. I told her so, and an elementary school war broke out. (Yeah, it wasn’t great. *sighs at younger self*) This is also an example of over-generalizing, as I thought everyone knew that Santa Claus was fake…
      Trouble with social interactions: This is partially because of the previous symptoms. The other part is struggling or not being able to read body language, not knowing how to start or end conversations, not realizing that if you talk for more than five minutes straight you’re taking over the conversation, leaving seemingly abruptly, etc.
      So, there’s more symptoms then this, but…XD This reply is already too long.

      Resources for you:

      #1. Stephanie Bethany (it’s a YouTube channel by a Christian lady with autism and while it’s focus is more on level one autism, it does talk about level three)

      #2. Autism Family (it’s also a YouTube channel, but it’s also by parents who have three sons with different levels of autism)

      #3. *wishing I had more resources for you that weren’t just research papers because people don’t like reading research papers*

      If I’m remembering correctly, none of these need content labels, just use common sense. =)
      Also, I can give you the current autism criteria if you want.

      And I totally agree with Loopylin, Sarafini, and Godlyfantasy.

      So…yeah. If you have any questions, let me know. XD I know I just dumped a lot of information on you. Sorry…XD definitely can’t tell that I like researching about these things and have done it for a ridiculous amount of time…😅

      @sarafini
      Actually, having sensory issues doesn’t necessarily mean you have autism. However, you do have a higher chance of having it since you have relatives that do. Besides autism, people with ADHD/ADD, anxiety disorders, hyperacusis, and migraine episodes (but only during the episode) can have sensory issues…and I’m sure there’s more but that’s all I can think of right now. 😅

      "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
      (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

      #130890
      GodlyFantasy12
      @godlyfantasy12
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 6645

        @gwyndalf-the-wise this is so amazing/eye opening thank you!!! It really helps me with my baby Paxton too (and Also November just a bit) while they don’t technically have Autism they do probably have some sort of “disorder” and (I’m calling it that cuz idk what else to call it….don’t take offense I also have what someone might would call a disorder) and Paxton has PTSD that mimics autism, so this is very helpful.

         

         

        #IfMarcelDiesIRiot
        #ProtectMarcel
        #ProtectSeb

        #130901
        Gwyndalf the Wise
        @gwyndalf-the-wise
          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
          • Total Posts: 404

          @godlyfantasy

          this is so amazing/eye opening thank you!!!

          Of course!!! =)

          It really helps me with my baby Paxton too (and Also November just a bit) while they don’t technically have Autism they do probably have some sort of “disorder” and (I’m calling it that cuz idk what else to call it….don’t take offense I also have what someone might would call a disorder) and Paxton has PTSD that mimics autism, so this is very helpful.

          XD Honestly girl, unless you…I don’t know XD attack? yell at? words? me or something, I’m not gonna be offended or upset with you. =) If you say something that takes me aback or I’m confused on, I’ll just ask you about it nicely.
          And I’m happy to help! If you or @loopylin (or anyone else) have any questions too, I’d be happy to answer them or direct you to something that answers your questions if I can find one!

          @freedomwriter76
          XD Oh, I forgot to mention that we like things to be precise and accurate, XD if you can’t tell by the amount of times that I edit my comments, warn you that I didn’t think of the right word, get really frustrated when KP eats the posts I’ve been working on for hours….*didn’t realize how much I did this until you got me thinking about it*
          So schedules are a big thing. We like to do the same things in the same patterns. Typically because it’s soothing. Everyone dislikes change, but at least for me, that dislike seems to be upped a lot more than others. Probably because it’s anxiety inducing…so I’m not sure if that comes from my autism or anxiety disorder.
          However, if you do research into autism, you’ll see lots of things related to how we don’t like change, or how we don’t handle it well.

          "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
          (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

          #130968
          LoopyLin
          @loopylin
            • Rank: Chosen One
            • Total Posts: 2027

            @gwyndalf-the-wise

            drumming your legs while seated,

            Ah, yes. The notorious leg bounce. I have annoyed so many different people with that one.

            That was really interesting, and I think confirms my suspicion that my charrie Ellie has it. I don’t think that it will be at all the main focus of the story though.

            Thanks for posting that. It was really cool to read!

            Space Princess ✨🪐 intp artist

            #131021
            Gwyndalf the Wise
            @gwyndalf-the-wise
              • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
              • Total Posts: 404

              @loopylin

              Ah, yes. The notorious leg bounce. I have annoyed so many different people with that one.

              XD Same…

              That was really interesting, and I think confirms my suspicion that my charrie Ellie has it. I don’t think that it will be at all the main focus of the story though.

              Glad it helped you. =)
              Oh yay! *relief* Stories where the character has a disorder but it’s not the focus of the story are always better, in my opinion. 😅(The ones I’ve read that are solely about the characters having autism are just…either terrible sob stories that are…weird. Or, they’re badly written and the character isn’t a character anymore, they are the definition of autism.) …and isn’t that what biographies and medical research papers/journals are for?

              Thanks for posting that. It was really cool to read!

              Of course! XD I find this stuff fascinating and don’t really have anyone to infodump to in real life (…it’s always so weird to type that, y’all exist, y’all are a part of real life…just not my in-person life…), cause nobody’s that interested and wants that much information…XD

              "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
              (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

              #131056
              Anonymous
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 8156

                @sarafini. @loopylin. @godlyfantasy12. Again, thank all of y’all so much for all the info! It really helps!!!


                @gwyndalf-the-wise
                . Wow, that’s a LOT more information than what I first expected! Thank you so much!!! 💕💕💕💕

                So, this kid that I’m thinking about maybe having autism, it wasn’t realized that he had it until AFTER his family moved to America a year after WWII ended, in, like 1946. I’m not really sure what made me think about making him be autistic, tbh…😅 I just thought about it, and then I was like: “Uhm…I have NO CLUE how to write a child with autism…” 😅😂

                So I asked for help! 😉

                I will say that he’s probably not on a severe level of autism…so he’s probably not even diagnosed. 😅

                I can see how he’d be sensory seeking, and I can see how he’d have maybe a few stims, and I can ABSOLUTELY see how he’d want everything to be precise…he’s even like that when he’s a baby in my WWII book…😅😊💕 And when he’s older…that probably comes out even more.

                But, like, if he’s not on a high level of autism, would most of these things still occur, or not as much?

                (and the whole thing of accusing the parent, that can soooo play into my story…but that’s just sad! It’s not their fault! 😭😭😭)

                #131066
                Anonymous
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
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                  @freedomwriter76

                  Definitely the having things be precise. I have a friend who’s daughter has autism but hers is definitely a less severe one. However she’s very quirky and one of her quirks is having things lined up correctly. Not sure about the other stuff but this quirk is definitely possible. 😉

                  #131078
                  Gwyndalf the Wise
                  @gwyndalf-the-wise
                    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                    • Total Posts: 404

                    @freedomwriter76

                    Wow, that’s a LOT more information than what I first expected! Thank you so much!!! 💕💕💕💕

                    You’re welcome! XD definitely can’t tell that I’ve researched this for two years and never had a chance to infodump on someone

                    So, this kid that I’m thinking about maybe having autism, it wasn’t realized that he had it until AFTER his family moved to America a year after WWII ended, in, like 1946.

                    Ah, yeah…in that case he’s probably a level one…but he’d be considered to have Asperger’s Syndrome. Here’s a website that I think explains it pretty well: https://www.autism-society.org/what-is/aspergers-syndrome/

                    I’m not really sure what made me think about making him be autistic, tbh…😅 I just thought about it, and then I was like: “Uhm…I have NO CLUE how to write a child with autism…” 😅😂
                    So I asked for help! 😉

                    XD For me it’s always the opposite. I’m like *realizes I have a lot of characters with mental disorders* “I think I’m gonna make this one as normal as possible….” #famouslastwords
                    *proceeds to accidentally give this character a lot of autistic traits, despite purposefully trying to avoid that* *facepalm* *lives with it, they meet the DSM 5 criteria for autism anyways, so…shrugs*

                    I will say that he’s probably not on a severe level of autism…so he’s probably not even diagnosed. 😅

                    Yeah, for the time period he wouldn’t be diagnosed with autism. However, as I previously stated, he could qualify for Asperger’s Syndrome which did exist at the time. (although I’m not sure if that information was available in America at the time, so you might wanna research that.) I don’t know what his particular symptoms are, but he might also qualify for PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified). I haven’t done a lot of research into that one, though.

                    I can see how he’d be sensory seeking, and I can see how he’d have maybe a few stims, and I can ABSOLUTELY see how he’d want everything to be precise…he’s even like that when he’s a baby in my WWII book…😅😊💕 And when he’s older…that probably comes out even more.

                    Yeah….XD I’ve noticed that when people get older they start to care less about what other people think…so that can also play into how much he masks and stuff.

                    But, like, if he’s not on a high level of autism, would most of these things still occur, or not as much?

                    Yes. What seperated autism and Asperger’s at the time was that people with autism have more spoken language problems, like they may or may not be able to speak, delays in developing speech, etc. Also they were more likely to have intellectual disabilities, apraxia, dispraxia, seizures, etc. Also…toileting issues which I’m not gonna talk about because TMI. Other than that Asperger’s is very similar to  autism but they have average to above average intelligence, early readers, no/very mild spoken language problems or (other than understanding language and possibly weird tones of voice, depends on the person). Also people with Asperger’s are more likely to have alexthymia (trouble identifying emotions in themselves, others, and since they can’t identify it, trouble talking about/describing emotions) and high anxiety levels. Anxiety disorders are very commonly co-morbid (means occur along with) with autism level one, and so are depressive disorders, since as the Bible says (paraphrased) “An anxious heart leads to depression.”
                    If you’re gonna go with autism level one, Stephanie Bethany’s Youtube channel I think would be very helpful to you, cause it talks a lot about that.
                    XD Just realized I didn’t really answer your question, sorry. So…Yes, most of those things would still occur. As an adult they’d still occur, but he’d find ways of hiding it (smaller, less noticable stims, would be familiar with the metaphors, idioms, and sarcasm he’s been exposed to and would react correctly to those). More of his symptoms will be noticable when he’s HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, or tired). I could probably give you ideas on ways he could hide his symptoms if you want them to be more subtle, but I’d have to know what kinds of things you’re thinking about giving him.

                    (and the whole thing of accusing the parent, that can soooo play into my story…but that’s just sad! It’s not their fault! 😭😭😭)

                    I KNOW!!! It’s terrible that people believed that. I mentioned it because your characters are so guilt-ridden…it’s just another way to give them that XD we authors are so terrible to our characters…

                    Let me know if you got any more questions or need clarification on something, etc. =)

                    "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
                    (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

                    #132194
                    Anonymous
                      • Rank: Chosen One
                      • Total Posts: 8156

                      @gwyndalf-the-wise. Thank you sooo much for all that extra information!!!

                      Sooo…uhm…well…apparently he is gonna be a POV character in a book, but he’ll be an adult…so I may need even more advice. 😅🤣

                      I’m also wondering if he has ADHD as well or not…but I think he probably just has Level 1 Autism.

                      I could probably give you ideas on ways he could hide his symptoms if you want them to be more subtle, but I’d have to know what kinds of things you’re thinking about giving him.

                      Yes, that would be IMMENSELY appreciated!!!

                      So, I’m thinking (at least some!!!) of the symptoms he has are thus:

                      • Always wants things to be precise
                      • Doesn’t understand NEW idioms, metaphors, sarcasm, etc
                      • Doesn’t keep eye contact with people very well
                      • Fidgets when he has to sit still for an extended period of time (prob. drums his fingers on his knees a lot)

                      And…that’s all I can think of as of this moment. He’ll be, like 22 in the book where he’s a POV MC.

                      If you can help, I would greatly appreciate it! 😊💕

                      #132199
                      Gwyndalf the Wise
                      @gwyndalf-the-wise
                        • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                        • Total Posts: 404

                        @freedomwriter76

                        So…I’m not supposed to be on KP today…but I’m getting on here to let you know that I’ll definitely respond to this tomorrow and try to help you out. Also ADHD can also be commonly co-morbid with autism (particularly level one), so it’s possible that your character has it. Although I don’t have ADHD I could probably give you a basic explanation of symptoms and personal observations of friends/family members with it if you want.

                        "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
                        (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

                        #132454
                        Gwyndalf the Wise
                        @gwyndalf-the-wise
                          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                          • Total Posts: 404

                          @freedomwriter76

                          Sooo…uhm…well…apparently he is gonna be a POV character in a book, but he’ll be an adult…so I may need even more advice. 😅🤣

                          XD Feel free to ask any questions you want! If I have an answer for you, I’ll give it to you, or if I don’t think I can explain it well then I’ll send you to a source that does. =)

                          So, I’m thinking (at least some!!!) of the symptoms he has are thus:

                          Always wants things to be precise
                          Doesn’t understand NEW idioms, metaphors, sarcasm, etc
                          Doesn’t keep eye contact with people very well
                          Fidgets when he has to sit still for an extended period of time (prob. drums his fingers on his knees a lot)

                          Cool, cool. Um, so since your character is a guy, I’m gonna warn you that most males on the spectrum symptoms’ tend to be more obvious… but I’ll still give you ideas for hiding them.

                          Okay. Sooooo…

                          I thought it might be helpful if I gave you all the Asperger’s Syndrome symptoms instead of ASD level one since that’s kinda broad. So some of this will be a repeat of what I’ve told you but not all of it, I think.

                          #1. Minimal social interaction. This can seem to be stereotypical introvert on steroids, but we can be extroverted or introverted.

                          #2. Um…if we haven’t learned to not always infodump on people, we’ll only talk about things that interest us, or about ourselves. However, your character can learn to not infodump on people, but he’ll probably end up talking about a certain subject that he’s really passionate about for a more than socially acceptable time. But he could learn not to do that as much and not talk about what he’s interested in unless asked specifically to elaborate on it, then he might infodump.

                          I just learned I still do this cause apparently if you’re the one talking for more than ten minutes straight you’re taking over the conversation…whoops.

                          #3. Not understanding emotions. You may feel…something, but not identify it. If he really struggles with this, it could be co-occuring alexithymia. Also, not being very expressive. Like, with facial expressions and body language. Since we can struggle to pick that up, it can be difficult to do back, depending on the person.

                          #4. Talking in an unusual way. Some use one pitch unless they’re excited…or they struggle to control their volume because they don’t realize that they’re being loud (or too quiet). Since your character is sensory seeking, this would be more likely for them. That doesn’t mean they have to do it all the time, but it they’re tired or worn out or something and not purposely focusing on their voice, it’s more likely to sound off.

                          #5. An intense obsession with one or two specific/narrow subjects. This could be anything. For me, it’s stories (which is pretty broad, but eh) and researching psychological disorders. I know some guys and for them it’s video games. For one kid it’s legos. There’s one girl and it’s music, etc. Up to you what your character likes.

                          #6. Having a rigid routine. Now…how rigid this is depends on the person. But generally, it’s like “I have this this this this this this and this to do today” and it gives you some sense of control over things that may or may not overwhelm you. Not saying that this is a good thing, but yeah. It can be over the ‘small’ things too, like what color someone is wearing, or you gotta have breakfast before math instead of doing math first like you usually do, etc. Changing routines (for little kids especially) can trigger meltdowns. And since that is less likely since your character is 22, it can still happen. Unfortunately, meltdowns aren’t things that you outgrow.

                          #7. Memorizing preferred facts and information easily. XD This is a blessing and a curse. It’s nice to remember things you like (say, an entire marvel movie), but it’s not so nice when you’re trying to memorize flashcards about boring information (insert some boring school thing that I can’t think of right now). And how much they can memorize also depends on the person.

                          #8. Uncoordinated. Especially with small objects like scissors (it’s difficult for me to cut straight, but I’m also left-handed and that makes it worse with right-handed scissors XD), or picking up something like a small bead, eraser, pencil, etc. And although this isn’t specifically mentioned, this can also come from having issues with depth-perception. Having depth-perception issues is more common in guys, even if they don’t have any eye problems. This leads to seeming clumsy, but that’s because they don’t realize how far or close something is, they only have a general idea.

                          #9. I already talked to you about the struggle to understand people’s perspectives, so I’m skipping this.

                          #10. Already talked to you about sensory issues. Although one thing I’ll mention is that they can trigger meltdowns too.

                           

                          Sooo….since you’re going to be in this character’s head a lot, here’s things to keep in mind.

                          We tend to be very visual, and even more so for guys. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of Temple Grandin (I think that’s how her name is spelled…), but the way she explains her visual memory would be a good resource for that.

                          Some people don’t remember things in color. I don’t know how common that is, though, just remember hearing that from some people. (insert grain of salt)

                          We’re a lot more literal inside of our heads than outside of it. So, even if this is a metaphor he’s seen before, he’s likely to visualize it inside of his head (and maybe laugh at himself) and then give the person the proper response.

                          Low processing speeds are a thing. Unless you’re serious about your character having ADHD, that’s a whole nother situation. So…slow processing is like (especially in groups) *doing your best to pay attention to this person even though there’s lots of other things going on* *what words did they say* and then either *jumps to the conclusion that we have the same thought/skips perspective taking* or *jumps to conclusion, realizes that actually there’s a lot of different possibilities on what they could possibly mean* *has to consider all the options* *pick an option (or if they’re indecisive or unsure have them ask a whole list of questions asking what this person might possibly mean)* XD can’t tell what I do more often
                          *realize they’ve been thinking for ten – fifteen minutes and that the other person is getting bored or annoyed or is waiting on them* *and if they’re like me, panic, then proceed to apologize five times in a row*

                          I’m gonna come back with ways to hide symptoms, haven’t researched that in awhile.

                          "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
                          (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

                          #132473
                          Folith-Feolin
                          @folith-feolin
                            • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
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                            @gwyndalf-the-wise

                             

                            Ahh, yes, the glorious struggle of being left-handed

                            #132482
                            Anonymous
                              • Rank: Chosen One
                              • Total Posts: 8156

                              @gwyndalf-the-wise. Thank you for all that information! You are sooo helpful!!! 😊😁

                              #132486
                              Gwyndalf the Wise
                              @gwyndalf-the-wise
                                • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                                • Total Posts: 404

                                @folith-feolin

                                Indeed. Fortunately I have found fellows with familiar fates.

                                @freedomwriter76

                                Of course, glad I could help! =)

                                "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
                                (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

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