The potato army WIP.

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  • #197589
    Potato reporter
    @the_lost-journal
      • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
      • Total Posts: 966

      Should I tag some people!? I guess so.  ^^^^^^


      @keilah-h
      @rae @ellette-giselle @theducktator @grcr @linus-smallprint @raxforge @whalekeeper @loopylin @arcticanimals @esther-c @jonas

      hello, hybrid lore told me to tag people if I wanted them to give feedback over my stuff, so if you guys wouldn’t mind, could you judge my story? Thanks! 😅

      (it is on the previous page)

      "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

      #197598
      Cloaked Mystery
      @jonas
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 2876

        @the_lost-journal

        Super creepy, but interesting! Is this the entirety of the story, or is there going to be more? Either way, the mystery remains effective: if there’s more, than this is effective for piquing the reader’s interesting; if not, the questions it leaves unanswered are intriguing in and of themselves. I also liked your use of repetition.

        🏰 Fantasy Writer
        ✨ Magic System Creator
        🎭 Character RPer
        📚 Appreciator of Books

        #197603
        Potato reporter
        @the_lost-journal
          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
          • Total Posts: 966

          @jonas

          That is just one of the 6 stories in it (it is the shortest one) Other stories in A Cellar’s tales are about a lot of different things, here are some of the names:

          Security logs

          Hallucinations

          Friendly face

          and two other

          But I heard it does connect to the other stories. So the questions will be answered! But in some of the other stories!

          . I also liked your use of repetition.

          Thank you! The point of the story is Joey is seeing this banshee, but everyone around him thinks he is insane, but he keeps saying to himself that it is real.

          "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

          #197604
          Linus Smallprint
          @linus-smallprint
            • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
            • Total Posts: 1014

            @the_lost-journal

            Sorry I took a while to get back to you.

            Of the projects you shared, The Kingdom of Kaimor sounds the most interesting to me. (Like Keilah, I like animal-hybrid races) Horror/Thrillars aren’t my thing, so A Cellar’s tales and P.I.-C.A.F.E are probably the least appealing. I did read that bit of A Cellar’s tales that you shared though. It was fine so far, I didn’t find it too creepy and more mysterious. It might be a little too quickly paced.

            Sometimes it is necessary to paint the sky black in order to see the stars.

            #197606
            Potato reporter
            @the_lost-journal
              • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
              • Total Posts: 966

              @linus-smallprint

              Thanks for getting back! I will try to make it slower! 😁

              and I will only share the other projects!

              "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

              #197608
              Linus Smallprint
              @linus-smallprint
                • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                • Total Posts: 1014

                @the_lost-journal

                You’re welcome!

                Sometimes it is necessary to paint the sky black in order to see the stars.

                #197626
                Potato reporter
                @the_lost-journal
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                  • Total Posts: 966

                  @linus-smallprint

                  😁

                   

                  "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

                  #197628
                  -GRCR-
                  @grcr
                    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                    • Total Posts: 1474

                    @the_lost-journal

                    Sorry I’m late in getting back to you.

                    Yeah, that was a creepy story. I don’t have too much to say about it—I agree with Linus about the pacing. I, too, like your use of repetition here. 😊

                    in my reached up to my ears, to feel them blood… leaking out of them…

                    I think I get what you’re saying here, but I had a bit of a hard time understanding this…??

                     

                     

                    I don’t like to read horror either, though. I’d love to read your other works if you post scenes, but I’d prefer not to be tagged for the scarier stuff. 😅 Sorry…

                     

                    If you pluck them, they explode. Goro.

                    #197632
                    Potato reporter
                    @the_lost-journal
                      • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                      • Total Posts: 966

                      @grcr

                      oop huge typo 😂 I forgot to type a lot of stuff 😂😂

                      Thanks!

                      "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

                      #200320
                      Potato reporter
                      @the_lost-journal
                        • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                        • Total Posts: 966

                        Hello whom ever cares

                        But I think I might just quit writing. I am not very good exceptional at it. My writing is bland, a brick wall has more depth than my characters. My story lines make no sense, and my pacing is faster than sonic the hedgehog.

                        "There is never nothing, always something " - ME 😁

                        #200325
                        Keilah H.
                        @keilah-h
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 6034

                          @the_lost-journal oh don’t do that! you can get better at writing by doing it and sharing it.

                           

                          and even if you do quit, will we still see you around? you always have funny things to say, and I like hearing them.

                          "When in doubt, eat cheese crackers."-me to my charries who don't even know about cheese crackers

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