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@ellette-giselle well I enjoyed the boxcar series for a while when I was younger, I think the thing was that I never really took them as particularly realistic anyway lol
The original series was written at a time when the market wasn’t oversaturated with “kids always know better” content, so it wasn’t as bad then, but yeah I can see problems in the modern time where there’s a ton of that already.
The Baker Family Adventures sounds really interesting, I’ll have to look them up! And honestly, even if it weren’t trying to reinforce the theme of “parents exist for a reason,” I feel like child detectives having contact with their parents as commanders just makes logical sense, y’know? Like, adult detectives usually are in an organization above them and have leaders and whatnot, right?
(also…..LOL the bit about the phone dying, that’s a trope in EVERY story where you have a leader who has to communicate with your characters from a distance)
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
(also…..LOL the bit about the phone dying, that’s a trope in EVERY story where you have a leader who has to communicate with your characters from a distance)
I know! 😀
there was literally a seen when Phil’s brother Andy was like, “Hang on Phil, before we don ANYTHING check your battery.”
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
@ellette-giselle haha that’s hilarious!!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
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@ellette-giselle
I promise both of you that I do not agree with the “kids always know better” thing either. I have been annoyed a bit that my book is this way, with characters who either disagree with their parents (like Martha and Tyn), or are separated from their parents (like Alan and Oliver). One day, I’ll try to write a book where the character is a child who is not separated from his parents and has a good relationship with both. But I promise you, we will see some examples of a parent being the right one or correcting their child (we have already seen a hint of this in Chapter the 7th – The Cook). The reason why Martha is going against her father’s wishes is not to show that she knows better. My only hint for you at the moment is that this has to do with the title of the series.Also, I was planning to get the next chapter to you today, but my cousin and her husband visited my family unexpectedly yesterday, so had to visit with them. (I had not seen her for 8 years and had never met her husband, so I to put off my writing to hang out with them.) I will try to get the chapter to you today, but I am a little stuck on a couple of things in it, so don’t be surprised if you don’t get it until next week.
Yeah, honestly, if you were to show some good parental interaction along with the bad, and show as the author that you don’t believe the while children know best thing, then I think you’re set.
Oh that’s awesome! I bet that was so fun to see her again! And her husband too. Hope you had a great time! I’ll probably have to cut back this weakened because I’ve got friends coming in for my 18th birthday. I don’t expect I’ll do much writing tomorrow because we’ll be getting ready for that.
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
@ellette-giselle @keilah-h @loopylin @stephie @theshadow
This week is a little busier for me. I still have time to write, but chapters may arrive a little later than expected. My church does a camp for families this week and I may be going out there for a couple of days. Also, I am a little stuck right now, trying to figure out how to introduce one of my characters and how to sort out something else. My goal is to at least get Chapter the 13th – The Self-Proclaimed Guardian to you by Friday and hopefully start working on Chapter the 14th – The Wizard.
No problem.
I’m willing to listen if you want to bounce ideas btw.
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
Okay. The problem I am having is that I am introducing a character who is supposed to be laid back, indecisive, and put things off (he is Martha’s brother, Eric). However, since he is supposed to lead Alan to his father, he comes across as more decisive than he really is, and sure, he might be more decisive at times, but it gives the wrong first impression of him. (Also. what makes his seem even more decisive is that Oliver requests that they sneak out of the town so that the other soldiers don’t wounder what he is up to. Don’t forget, Oliver stands out in Klaw, so Eric managing to sneak him out of the town would require some experience and skill.)
Why must you do this! (It’s not like I did the same thing with a character just a little while ago!)
Ok, this can be tough, cause yeah, you do need some decisiveness for this.
Hmm, is procrastination a character trait? If I’m reading the above right it is. Since that is so, Alan (and maybe Martha) can get a little annoyed at the fact that he’s not taking this whole thing seriously.
How old is he? I’m picturing someone around their age or a little older.
Here’s an idea.
They have a little meeting in the barn and Alan and Martha are all upity about this and trying to plan it out in fullest detail. Oliver will be a little more easy going about this, and Eric is going to be sitting there chewing on a piece of hey and doing a lot of shrugging when they ask this, or else not worrying about things that Alan or Martha thinks he should be worried about. Martha seems to sense risk in this so show that she’s got an underlying nervous tension which will make her pick apart every idea for flaws. Alan has a HUGE amount at stake here, so have him be pushing for this to fast and smooth. Eric is going to get on both of their nervous because neither of these things are a factor for him. And, if he is aware of a big risk, he’s not reacting the way Martha thinks he should be reacting.
Also, why is Eric the one who comes up with the idea to sneak Oliver out. If I were Alan and had been kinda on the run a good amount of my life, I would know a lot of clever ways for getting in and out of towns unseen. If he can get Eric to take this seriously and give him a good layout of the direction they will take, Alan can figure out how to get Oliver out.
Now, if you want an under-current of a brave and smart guy and/or strong leader in Eric but it’s not seen, then you can still have them, get annoyed and have him seem too at ease, but betray the truth through the way he remembers everything they say, and maybe a facial expression, eye movement, or the fact that he really does end up getting them all there safely and he really did know what he was doing, but at the time you can cause us, (through Alan) do believe that he is going to fail.
Any of this helpful?
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
Hmm, is procrastination a character trait? If I’m reading the above right it is. Since that is so, Alan (and maybe Martha) can get a little annoyed at the fact that he’s not taking this whole thing seriously.
Yup, I don’t think determined and heroic Alan is going to like Eric much at first.
How old is he? I’m picturing someone around their age or a little older.
Eric is 17. Martha is 18. I’ll get you a picture of Eric right away. I don’t have one of Martha ready to go yet.
and Eric is going to be sitting there chewing on a piece of hey
Eric might actually find this repulsive. He’s a bit of a germaphobic.
Also, why is Eric the one who comes up with the idea to sneak Oliver out. If I were Alan and had been kinda on the run a good amount of my life, I would know a lot of clever ways for getting in and out of towns unseen. If he can get Eric to take this seriously and give him a good layout of the direction they will take, Alan can figure out how to get Oliver out.
Ah, of course! When Oliver mentions his dilemma, Eric is unsure what to do. He knows how to sneak around a bit, but not that well. Alan eventually gets fed up with waiting, and takes charge, asking Eric for directions, but leading how they sneak around. Think I will use that. Thanks!
Now, if you want an under-current of a brave and smart guy and/or strong leader in Eric but it’s not seen, then you can still have them, get annoyed and have him seem too at ease, but betray the truth through the way he remembers everything they say, and maybe a facial expression, eye movement, or the fact that he really does end up getting them all there safely and he really did know what he was doing, but at the time you can cause us, (through Alan) do believe that he is going to fail.
There could be some of this in Eric. He suffers from some imposter syndrome (belives he is lacking in some skills he really does have.) Eric also has a good eye for detail.
Thank you for the help!
Picture of Eric added. Fun fact: All of my characters are me in some way, but Eric is probably the most similar to me personality-wise (Which is not entirely a good thing). He also is the character that looks the most like me.
Eric might actually find this repulsive. He’s a bit of a germaphobic.
Oh goodness. I dislike germaphobic guys. 😛
I’m glad this was helpful tho! Sometimes I just need people to give some ideas and it helps me come up with new ones. ;D
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
OH MY GOODNESS!! I love the picture! I think that’s your best one yet!!!
Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”
@linus-smallprint wow great picture!!!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
@linus-smallprint that’s ok!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
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