Home Page › Forums › Fiction Writing › Critiques › Novel Critique Requests › The Color of Hope
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hybridlore.
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February 27, 2025 at 8:21 am #198595
Oh, this is unrelated, but by the way, how is Challenge 4 going? What are you planning to do for your senior thesis? (I saw you were sprinting to work on it.)
You’ve seen that already? I haven’t figured out how to make a slack account yet. 😂
4 is going well! Classmates have been a little emotional, though. The first day this year, one of the guys started crying because he was ‘proud of everyone.’ That was one of the best moments so far. Normally everyone’s trying to kill each other with jokes.
My thesis is about how films processed WWII during the fallout years. I’m fascinated with the rise of Godzilla and its origins in Japanese lore, for example. And there’s a lot of stuff in America to look at too, since Hollywood had to recover from their war propaganda.
Thanks for asking! Which Challenge are you in?
"If I don't like something, it's probably sanctification. Ugh." -E.C.S.
February 27, 2025 at 8:24 am #198596The only problem is, I’ll have to figure out where that belongs in Cole’s character arc, since the timing on that is a little uncertain. I’m planning for this to be a duology, so that might be a great idea for the second book. I’ll just have to spend some time figuring out when I want to repair their relationship.
Ah, so you want them to be distant for much longer than I anticipated? 🥲 Glad I was of some help, anyway.
"If I don't like something, it's probably sanctification. Ugh." -E.C.S.
February 27, 2025 at 8:26 am #198597Wait… you posted in the spring channel here, I think. Are you joining KDWC?
Lolol! Yeah, senior year is kind of crazy.
Normally everyone’s trying to kill each other with jokes.
🤣🤪
Oh wow. I’ve never really thought about that before, but it must be really weird and interesting. What’s the coolest thing you’ve learned so far?
Yeah! I watched the senior thesis presentations last year for the CC we were at. I’m in Challenge 3 rn, but we’re still trying to decide whether or not I’m going to do 4.
EDIT: Eep, missed you because of lag. Yeah… let’s just say that Sara becoming a Christian isn’t going to help their relationship much. But it’ll be ok in the end 😉
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This reply was modified 1 month ago by
hybridlore.
"Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C. S.
February 27, 2025 at 8:40 am #198600Wait… you posted in the spring channel here, I think. Are you joining KDWC?
Oh yeeaah, I did. Okay, makes more sense that you knew. 🤣 Yep, I signed up! I think I’m in Brookside Stories?
Lolol! Yeah, senior year is kind of crazy.
All of the kids are really smart and empathetic, but that also means they know exactly how to make each other laugh. So it just goes back and forth… I don’t think I can survive another week. 😳😝 And the teacher puts ME in the trouble chair.
What’s the coolest thing you’ve learned so far?
Godzilla origins are pretty cool. Having watched some quality anime, I can see how Japanese film uses more metaphor than story arc. The first Godzilla film was pretty open about its inspiration, but still. Another thing I’m interested in is Studio Ghibli. One of the filmmakers experienced bombing, and it partially inspired Grave of the Fireflies, which is said to be the saddest animated movie of all time.
But it’ll be ok in the end 😉
Okay, good. 😂
"If I don't like something, it's probably sanctification. Ugh." -E.C.S.
February 27, 2025 at 10:43 am #198628I don’t think you are going overboard with different aspects of Sara’s character. The different aspects of her character aren’t distracting from each other. Her synesthesia gives he a unique perspective on the world. Her depression is a flaw she is seeking to overcome. Her love of facts interests her, and as my editor says, ‘interesting characters are interesting.’ I’m not getting the feeling that you’ve treated her like a bucket (just adding stuff you like to her at random without considering how it fits together, creating inconsistencies.) Instead she feels more like a magnet (when the core of the character attracts or repels different aspects of character so that it all fits together.). Her synesthesia just by its nature just makes her seem more thoughtful. She seems to pause and appreciate the different colors. So it fits well with her love of facts. She pauses to consider stories instead of jumping to conclusions. I think her depression could tie into this well, as she is pausing to consider life, and it just feels empty to her.
(I also like complicated characters.)
@whalekeeper’s suggestion is good. If I recall correctly Cole has been the one who has been more concerned that the twins are drifting apart, so it makes sense that he would make the first move.Sometimes it is necessary to paint the sky black in order to see the stars.
February 27, 2025 at 4:02 pm #198701Normally everyone’s trying to kill each other with jokes.
That’s how my class works too. XD
To err is human; to arr is pirate.
February 27, 2025 at 4:12 pm #198702@whalekeeper “twin telepathy” lol people still say that’s a thing?
my twin characters, of which I have several, completely lack anything resembling that trait haha
"When in doubt, eat cheese crackers."-me to my charries who don't even know about cheese crackers
February 27, 2025 at 4:41 pm #198706I know a pair of twins who say they have it, but they’re probably joking. XD I and my younger sister sometimes have telepathy moments too, so I think it’s more of a close sibling thing.
"If I don't like something, it's probably sanctification. Ugh." -E.C.S.
February 27, 2025 at 5:21 pm #198709@whalekeeper yeah it seems that way. My brother and I are pretty close, so maybe we’ve had something like that all along but have never paid attention to it.
Or called it “telepathy.” Really seems more like intuition with me. Twintuition. Lol
"When in doubt, eat cheese crackers."-me to my charries who don't even know about cheese crackers
February 27, 2025 at 5:22 pm #198710(My brother isn’t my twin, he’s four years younger, but ehh.)
"When in doubt, eat cheese crackers."-me to my charries who don't even know about cheese crackers
February 27, 2025 at 5:31 pm #198714Oh yeeaah, I did. Okay, makes more sense that you knew. 🤣 Yep, I signed up! I think I’m in Brookside Stories?
🤣🤣
Oh, awesome!! I guess I’ll see you on there, then! 😉
I don’t think I can survive another week. 😳😝 And the teacher puts ME in the trouble chair.
The trouble chair?? XD
Godzilla origins are pretty cool. Having watched some quality anime, I can see how Japanese film uses more metaphor than story arc. The first Godzilla film was pretty open about its inspiration, but still. Another thing I’m interested in is Studio Ghibli. One of the filmmakers experienced bombing, and it partially inspired Grave of the Fireflies, which is said to be the saddest animated movie of all time.
Today during class our whole debate strand was just WW2 talk 😂 Since we’re reading American History. We talked about propaganda and stuff a little, and how the Japanese were so, like, fight-to-the-death mentality and refused to surrender. It’s probably a really interesting topic, not just in WW2, but also just throughout history and in the past how popular movies/books have been influenced by big world events.
"Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C. S.
February 27, 2025 at 5:35 pm #198715Wow, your depiction of her personality was really cool to read. I hadn’t even thought about all those things together like that–like how she pauses to consider different things–but you have a good point.
Awesome, thank you!! I’m glad it doesn’t seem to be too much for you guys.
"Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C. S.
February 27, 2025 at 5:36 pm #198717I and my younger sister sometimes have telepathy moments too, so I think it’s more of a close sibling thing.
Hey, that happens to me and my younger sister as well! We’re almost 2 years apart, but spend a good amount of time together (as homeschoolers 😝). We’re always trying to say the same thing or making the same connections.
"Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C. S.
March 1, 2025 at 5:56 pm #198867Going to catch up soon, but I noticed you used the word “glanced” a few times in one chapter (can’t remember which). It was just a little repetitive, not at all big though.
“Our house is full of ducks!!!!”
March 1, 2025 at 7:26 pm #198879Yeah, that sounds about right. (It’s one of my favorite words 🤪). I’ll try to be mindful of it.
"Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C. S.
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