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Alright, I’m finally starting to post chapters of my WIP up for critiques. This is going to be a Google Doc link with restricted access, so if you want to read it (and you’re not already added) just request access and I should be able to approve it. This is a first draft (rough draft), so right now I’m not looking for line-by-line critiques, but I would still love to know your guys’ overall thoughts about everything. So excited to hear what y’all think! 🥰
It’s currently at 23,000 ish words, fourteen chapters. The link I’m about to share has the first two, and I’ll probably slowly add in the rest later. Here’s the moodboard and the blurb for the novel:
Denver, 2053
Aspiring journalist Sara Bauer has synesthesia–a condition which, for her, gives words color and shape, texture and personality. She dreams of a career writing for DenNet, the local government-monitored news platform, as a powerful voice informing and spurring others to action. But the murky depression and lack of purpose she struggles with make her wonder if her words will ever matter.
When a classmate invites her to an underground church meeting, she starts to wonder if Jesus could be what–or who–she’s missing. But her twin brother, Cole, isn’t so sure that the meetings are worth the risk. A new law threatens to turn the opposition against religion into persecution–and with their graduation approaching, one wrong move could jeopardize their entire future. Is the hope Sara’s found in Christ worth risking everything–even her dream?
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
@ellette-giselle @koshka @elishavet-pidyon @kyronthearcanin @whalekeeper @savannah_grace2009 @esther-c @theducktator @grcr @jonas @linus-smallprint @anyone-else-interested!
Here’s the link:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1pSXTTsloPa9NeeYjCJlK_Q5-6Ryc0cWlqdUWnst4oBw/edit?usp=sharing
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
Sorry to the people who I sent out the wrong link to 😂 Working on fixing that
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
@rae @trailblazer @freed_and_redeemed @mineralizedwritings @keilah-h @theshadow @the_lost-journal
@esther-c Awesome! 😁INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
Also, please excuse the cringiness of the first chapter. It has absolutely no point other than to establish the characters and setting, and it will probably be the first thing I rewrite 😅
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
I’ll check it out, but I have a lot of stuff that I should read but I haven’t gotten to because… *cough* procrastination *cough cough* so maybe I’ll get to it. Request sent.
Why do I change my signature so much? DJT!!!
#AnduthForever (Lord Willing)I have a feeling you’ll enjoy some of the underground church chapters, or maybe be able to help me with some of what the pastor says.
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
This sounds great, I’lol look at it tomorrow.
"No! Monkeys should have pets, all monkeys should have pets!"
OH MY GOODNESS!!!
GIRL!
I knew you could write but I didn’t know you could write!
MAN! How do you do that!
Also, please excuse the cringiness of the first chapter. It has absolutely no point other than to establish the characters and setting, and it will probably be the first thing I rewrite 😅
*screech!* No!!! NONONO! Whatever you do, LEAVE IT! You did what I’ve never been able to do. You established your world and characters in one of the best ways possible and it works so well! I know your character’s personality, I know Cole has asthma (or something close to it), I know their likes and dislikes, I know their world…..
Man, this is so, so good and I’m completely DYING to read more! So well done.
I actually have a critique, but It’s for the blurb. I would suggest removing the part about the church meetings…. or else making it more vague. I went into the story not having read the blurb, and I really like how it’s unfolding for me. Then I read the blurb and I was like… oh. Well, okay. Now I know where this is going.
I wouldn’t add that part.
I can work with you on some blurb ideas if you want. Or you can keep it. Up to you. Just my thought.
Anyways, I can’t wait for more!!!
Man is born for the fight, to be forged and molded into a sharper, finer, stronger image of God
I have a feeling you’ll enjoy some of the underground church chapters, or maybe be able to help me with some of what the pastor says.
REALLY!?! Awww, yeaaaah! I’m going to enjoy those chapters :}
Why do I change my signature so much? DJT!!!
#AnduthForever (Lord Willing)Awww, I’m so glad you like it!!! That means so much to me 🥰🥰 Honestly. Thank you so much for reading it.
Welll….. 😅 I didn’t really know where I was going with it when I started, I just knew I had to start. I’ll probably keep it as like, the same scene, but I still need to rewrite parts of it. It’s also super short compared to what I’m aiming for with each chapter now, so maybbeee I can leave most of the scene that’s already there and then just fix the ending and add on.
For the blurb, I get what you mean. That doesn’t have to be the final version, but it was the one I settled on most recently. I understand the no-spoilers thing, but I really don’t know if I can give an accurate picture of the book without mentioning the church meetings because Sara’s conversion is one of the main points of the book. You get what I mean? And then the end of the blurb shows her inner struggle, what she’ll have to overcome. I’m up for changing it eventually if I can find something that works as well, so if you have specific ideas about how much you would want to see in there without spoiling too much, I’d love to see them.
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
Awesome!! I think the first one is… *checks* Chapter 7. So only a few more to go.
INTP 🧡 Homeschooler 🧡 Violinist 🧡 Current WIP: TCoH
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