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July 19, 2023 at 2:15 pm #151506
@freedomwriter76
Sorry life is rough girl…I’ll be praying for you 💖💖💖
Tysm! <3
And girl…tysm for just…being here…it means so much to me. 💗💗💗💗
Yw! Glad to be of help, it means a lot to me to talk to you too. <3
How’s life otherwise? Any writing or exciting things? Or not exciting things lol?
Alright I guess. I mean, it’s good, it is…but it’s just hard too right now, y’know? idk…it’s just hard. I’m doing okay tho, and it helps knowing that I have friends to talk to, both on here and elsewhere, and it’s easier to do so with my in-person friends and even my cousin with having a phone now. 🙂Writing’s going pretty well tho…idk, I seem to write even better when I’m emotional 😂 Freedom’s Fire is at 50k+, and it’s made me pretty happy. 😊
Same lol. I write so much better when I’m emotional! Lol. 50k is great! 🙂
The puppy is outside, and he’s sweet…and he’s been a sense of comfort some days too 💖 Texting my best friend has really helped as well, and I’m making it through. <3
I’m glad you’ve had some help! Puppy does sounds great lol. I wanted a kitty for the longest time.
Oh I finished Layson’s backstory too! It’s not edited yet.
Tauren leans to the side, stretching out his tired back.
I can’t believe it’s only lunch.
He sighs, righting himself. His back pops again, settling into place.
“Heyyyyy!!”
Tauren glances over at the boy coming up the hallway next to him. He smiles wildly, charging through with unlimited energy.
“Hi Layson.” Tauren smiles tiredly.
Layson takes off his helmet, shaking out his long sweaty blond hair. “How’s it going?”
“Not bad.” Tauren says, quickening his pace to keep up with Layson. “You?”
“I get my braces off soon.” Layson stuffs his helmet back on his head.
“Cool.”
“I got an idea last night.” Layson says, rubbing his hands together.
Tauren raises an eyebrow. “And who is it this time?”
“Oh! Well…” Layson pauses. “I know Camella really well… right? We’re friends n’all? I want to ask her on a date—we could like– go to the Saturday dance together or something… I dunno.”
Tauren narrows his eyes. “Are you asking for my opinion?”
Layson furrows his eyebrows. “No.”
“You should.”
Layson lets out an exaggerated sigh. “Ok fine.”
“I think she’s going to say no, and you shouldn’t do it.”
“Dude…” Layson makes a face. “Talk about glass half empty approach.”
Tauren sighs. “Well it would only be logical, right?”
Layson furrows his eyebrows. “Man! That’s just messed up.”
Tauren shrugs. “I didn’t mean it that way. I just… if something has a near proven result, why keep trying? I’m just saying I think you need to just… wait a bit or something… I dunno what I’m trying to say. I didn’t mean to put a damper on you.”
“No, it’s ok. Maybe I needed to hear that.” Layson sighs. “I just wish it was different. I’m so good at making friends y’know? I could be a professional friend!”
Tauren laughs.
“But yeah… that’s the only side of social skills I have.”
“Making friends is good.” Tauren turns down the main hall. “You gotta be friends with her first, right?
“Yeaah.” Layson chuckles. “I know. Does Lesli like you?”
“No way!” Tauren laughs. “We’re just friends.”
“Apparently your mom thinks otherwise.”
“Yeah, I know.” Tauren laughs. “That’s just my mom being herself.”
“Well anyways, thanks for the awesome advice.” Layson says sarcastically. “I suppose I’ll just be a bachelor my entire life.”
Tauren shrugs. “Hey, you asked for my opinion.”
“Barely.” Layson says, turning into the breakroom.
Tauren smiles, looking over the small, crowded room for Lesli.
I first met Layson in 5th grade. Lesli was in a different grade band than I, so I didn’t have any friends. He was super friendly. Layson skipped back a grade, he’s actually a year older than me. I think it made him a little bit of an outsider. I was feeling really odd about being in school without Lesli. I’d always been her little shadow, and now I was exposed to the lights. If Layson has one outstanding skill (other than being a professional friend maker) it’s playing cards. I frankly hate the game, but having somebody to hang out with was enough make me learn.
As we got older, Layson developed a keen interest in girls. He had a lot of friends that were girls, one which he particularly liked. I’ve never been in any kind of a rush like Layson, so I would watch his antics from the sidelines, giving well thought out advice where I thought it due. Girls in Layson’s grade hardly had enough respect for him, and the ones in our grade saw him as their silly friend. I know it was disheartening for him, so I tried my best to be a good friend ad say what I thought would help.
“You should stop asking them.”
Sure, he was doing nothing wrong. But 9th grade is considered pretty early for most. I tried to give m best advice without getting involved, and was often present when Layson was going about whatever plan he had. The time he asked Kendel. And Esther… and Riley… I was present almost every time.
“Maybe you jus aren’t old enough.”
“yeah…”
Nadine was really nice. She was fast becoming Layson’s best friend, and I thought he might have actually had a shot this time. Not that I supported him trying to get a date at 9th grade… I just wanted to stay out of it while being a good friend.
“Nadine…”
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure!”
“Can we go on a date?”
“Oh…”
“I’m not old enough. My parent’s won’t let me.”
And that was that. End of story. Layson stopped trying. Everything was fine.
Until that one walk home from school. We saw Nadine from a distance, waiting in front of the mines entryway. She smiled and waved, though not in our direction. A young miner came out and took her hand. The youngest of the miners were helpers, only a year older than us. I wasn’t shocked at all, the world has all kinds of surprises for us. Layson was. He considered Nadine his friend, and the thought that she would lie to him instead of just telling the truth… I think it might have broken his heart. He didn’t say anything about it until a couple days later. And just like the faithful shadow I always was, I caught heard the whole thing.
“Nadine… you could have just told me you didn’t like me.”
“Oh, but I never said that!”
“I saw you with another guy… and I mean that’s ok… but why did you need to lie about it?”
“Oh… I just wanted to stay friends. I mean if I would have straight up said no, you might have I dunno… not wanted to be around me or something?”
“I don’t know what you intended, but friends don’t lie to each other like that.”
“Well, I’m sorry, it’s called preserving a friendship.”
“…Sure.”
I’ve tried my best to be a good friend throughout it, but who knows what the right thing to say is. We’re really different. I don’t pursue my dreams like he does, and I know his biggest dream is to have a family someday. It’s a lot less petty than it used to be, not just some game of getting a girlfriend. Now that I work with Lesli, I’m not sure I know Layson as well as I used to. We cross paths sometimes still… but he always comes around eventually to share some crazy idea he’s come up with.
- This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by MineralizedWritings.
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:09 pm #151517@mineralizedwritings Nice!
One thing: I like how you alternate between the character’s thoughts and the scene around him, but it’s probably a good idea to be consistent about that throughout the whole book, y’know what I mean? Like, don’t have that be the only long thought train in the book, otherwise your readers will be like “whaa? why is this so long?”
But if they’re used to it–like, if it’s a feature of the book–they won’t mind.
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 3:09 pm #151518@freedomwriter76 wow!
His wife died? That’s so sad!!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 3:09 pm #151519@esther-c awesome!!!
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 3:17 pm #151521Lol it is a little confusing! Here’s a picture of where the inspiration from that comes from. (Manga, reads right to left). There’s the large boxes of narration and then the dialogue from the scenes… it’s one of those things that doesn’t translate into words but works great when drawn out. This is from haikyuu btw, great series but don’t recommend unless you have a older sibling to screen like I did lol.
I’m going to post the pic below it’ll be eaiser
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:19 pm #151523"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:20 pm #151524"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:21 pm #151526Idk if you see what I mean, but it has a really different emotional impact then the straight text. And I agree that consistency will definitely help it flow smoother.
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:22 pm #151527@mineralizedwritings oh, ok cool!
It’s not like I don’t like it. I think it’s cool how you’re effectively switching between first and third person. I just wanted to point that out.
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 3:47 pm #151530Thanks!
Yeah Ik it’s a little weird 😂 XD
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
July 19, 2023 at 3:47 pm #151531This is completely random…..
but I wanted to know if anyone else does this.
Do any of you look for one reference image/quote but end up wasting like 30 minutes reading memes instead?
(too lazy to tag anyone lol)
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 3:56 pm #151532depending on what I’m looking up, probably 😅 I get distracted on pinterest sometimes, because of all the recommendations for stuff I like xD
WE ARE REVIVING THE PROTECTION SQUAD! *steals Joseph, Julian, and Sabina from Ellette*
July 19, 2023 at 4:10 pm #151533Um… no… definitely… not…??
*eyes shift back and forth*
Any noun can become a verb if you don't care enough.
July 19, 2023 at 4:13 pm #151534@hybridlore ha ha, yep it happened to me a few days ago.
@HighScribeOfAetherium lol…..Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
July 19, 2023 at 4:13 pm #151535I think we’re all guilty of it sometimes…
Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.
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